6.5 mo nap nightmare (at home only)- HELP

[Kirsten~]

A little background: Our Spirited DD is about 6.5 mo, and about a month ago, DH quit his job so he could do work at our house. He now has DD 2 days a week, and the other 3 days she goes to the babysitter. Our babysitter is amazing, and our DD is the only kid she watching except her own kids, who are all school-aged.

For the last 3-4 weeks, we have been having a nap nightmare. When she is at home (weekends or home with DH), she will wake from naps at 30 mins on the dot (extending never works), and putting her down for naps is a nightmare. Depending on how much patience we have putting her down for a nap can take 20-60 mins. She will be rubbing her eyes and yawing, but as soon as we put her down with her lovey and paci, she is wide awake. Once we leave the room, she cries, once we wake back in the room, she stops crying and is wide eyed and smiling. Often times what ends up happening is we put her down, she cries, we go back in so she's calm, then leave again and she cries, etc. This can go on forever! If we pick her up "too early" she will push and fight us, but I have noticed that after several rounds of crying I can bounce her to sleep. But no matter what, she's back awake at 30 mins.
The interesting thing is that when she is at the babysitter's, she naps great. She usually takes 1hr nap in the AM and 1.5-2h nap in the afternoon. I've asked our sitter how she puts her down for naps, and she says she puts her down awake and sometimes puts her hand on her tummy if she squirms or fusses. We obviously, have not been able to repeat this success.
Her nights are generally good. She goes to sleep independently, and aside from bad teething nights she usually only wakes once to nurse (anywhere from 2-4am).

I'm desperate for help. My weekends have become completely stressful, and I hate feeling like I'm not enjoying my little time with my DD. Plus I'm worried about the clearly OT situation we're dealing with. HELP PLEASE!! 

[ZacsMumme]

Hugs, what does she do with the babysitter during the day? Do you think she is Under or overstimulated at home? Do you PD at the same time as the sitter does for naps?
Anything else different ie does sitter have dark room and you have light? - white noise? 

[Kirsten~]

Thanks for the reply, Sara. I have been racking my brain trying to figure out what could be different. We do use white noise at home, and the babysitter does not, but she sleeps at night with the white noise, so I"m not sure if that's the issue or not. I could try without it. The light, I think, is about the same, and she used to nap better at home.
We don't PD at the same time because on the days when she goes to the sitter's she has a 30 min car ride in the morning (around 7:15ish), and she usually sleeps for part or all of that car ride. Plus DH and I see her yawning and rubbing her eyes earlier than her morning nap time at the sitter's. We look for those tired signs from her, and try to put her down once we see those signs, but she stills acts like she is wide awake once she goes into her crib.

Your question about her activities is interesting. I hadn't thought much about that. I don't know exactly what she does at the babysitters. I know she gets some mat time to roll around, and I know she goes on the 2 school runs (short drives). At home, we read to her, have her on her mat, have her in her activity station, etc. I wonder if our house is louder because DH Often has the radio on. Maybe I'll see if he can keep things quieter and see if that helps.

[ZacsMumme]

Can you poss offer a 30 min CN at the same time as the car ride to the sitters? Would she take it? Maybe she likes the reverse EAS with a CN then 2 long naps X

[Kirsten~]

Thanks again, Sara. I could try that. I'm not sure she would go down that early unless we did some APOP like a car ride or time in the stroller. I will try that this weekend and see how it goes (DH won't try anything unless I can prove him that it'll work). DH isn't worrying about it because she wakes up happy from her short naps, so he thinks it's a non-issue.

[ZacsMumme]

It's certainly worth a go, just to see if that makes a difference KWIM?
So ... What is her EAS at babysitters and then at home? Could it be at home her As are just a bit too long?

[Kirsten~]

Yeah, I might try to APOP this weekend just to see how it goes. I like to take her running with me in the jogging stroller, and she usually will sleep there, so I can try that.

Her EASY on babysitter days is like clockwork:
E: 6:30 (WU)
S: 7:15-7:45 (this is the car ride....sometimes she only sleeps 15-20 mins here, but she usually falls asleep for a little bit)
A: 7:45-9:30
S: 9:30-10:30
E:10:30 (EBM), and then solids around noon
S: 1:30-3
E: 3 or 3:30
S: 5-5:30 (this is the car ride home....she sleeps less on this ride than in the morning, so this is hit or miss)
E: 5:45 (solids) and the BM at 7
S: BT is between 7 and 7:30 depending on the day and how tired she seems

At home (always a little hard with the short naps, but here's a rough example):
E: 7
S: 8:30-9 (we watch for tired cues, and she'll usually be rubbing eyes and yawning by now)
A: 9-11
E: 11 (solids around noon if she hasn't gotten too tired, otherwise solids come after her 30 min nap; some days I bump up her E to get down for a nap earlier)
S: 1-1:30
A: 1:30-3
E: 3
S: 4-4:30
E: solids around 5:30 and BM before bed
S: On the weekends with the short naps, I sometimes push her BT up to 6:30, but often seems like she ends up taking an hour to get to sleep those nights.

Like I said, she does generally wake up happy even from those short naps, and if I try to extend with her paci she just looks up at me with wide eyes.

[ZacsMumme]

I think her first A time is too short at home. Typically 6 mth olds can do at least 2.5 hrs A time, some do less for first A, but I doubt they are OT 30 min naps at the start of the day.
Her next A time is really long so probably OT....
What about trying something like this Based on 6.30 wu
Nap 9 if you get a good nap then
A 3 hrs
Nap ~1pm if you get a good nap then
A 3 hrs
CN ~5.15-5.45
BT 7.30

If you get a short first nap offer the next nap after ~ 2 hrs and see how she goes... What do you think?

[Kirsten~]

Thanks, Sara. I've thought the same thing because I keep thinking that she should be able to go 2.5-3 hrs for her A time, but we often get eye rubbing and yawning early after she wakes (around that 1.5 hr mark). Should I just sort of power through those moments and see how she does? I guess a shift of only 30 mins shouldn't be too bad. I'll see if DH will try on Friday otherwise I'll start this weekend and see how it goes.

Also if she wakes later (which sometimes happens on the weekends) should I just follow the same pattern (about 2.5 hrs from WU to first nap)?

[ZacsMumme]

I would sati k with A times, so yup if she sleeps in adjust Nap accordingly.
At is age tired signs are hard as they get a bit unreliable. Sometimes they seem sleepy because its what their body is used to, other times its because they need a change of scene or are bored or OS. Maybe try changing the scene if she is a. I fussy, and see if it helps her last a little longer ... Then gently push the nap later. X

[Kirsten~]

So DH managed to get (what I think) was a freak nap on Friday. She took a 3 hr nap in the afternoon on Friday! So on Saturday I did push her A time to do that first nap around 845/9 (she woke around 630), and she did sleep for an hour! I should also note that she has never slept more than an hour in the morning. Her longer naps used to always be in the afternoon. So she woke from her nap around 10. But by 12 or 1215 she was rubbing her eyes and burying her head into my shoulder. So I ended up putting her down around 12:30, and she only slep 45 mins. Should I push through those tired cues? They just seem like such clear tired cues, so I went with it despite it only being 2.5 hrs.

I also need to see if I can get DH to mind the clock a tad more since he just puts her down at the first sign of tired cues. Sigh.

[ZacsMumme]

Hugs! Is hard to tell sometimes, but at this age they do start to show tired cues for other things, and they can be unreliable.
Definitely give a longer A a go, distraction works well for an extra 15 mins, or a walk around the garden, gentle, quiet A time.
X