HELP????? 13 month refusing bedtime/won't stay asleep

[Avamama75]

I've got on here a couple of times in the last year for help and was always pleased, I'm back!   And after last night I need HELP!    My daughter is 13 months.  She is to say the least an easy pleasant baby.  For months she's gone to sleep between 7:00 and 7:30 on her own with not a peep.  Of course there have been random bleeps as any baby will do but she's so easy that it's quite an event around our house when for the last 4 nights she's refused to go to bed and won't stay asleep it seems.  This is her schedule or was her schedule until the last few days.

6:00 - 6:30am  wake up/cup of milk  (we're off the bottle)
7:30 - breakfast
8:30 - 10:00 nap  (she goes down for these still without much fuss)
10:00 - cup of milk/snack
12:00 - lunch
1:30 - 3:00 nap (also takes this one without much difficulty)
3:00 - snack again
5:30 - supper
6:30 - bath/lotions/quiet time/cup of milk
7:00 - bedtime (which used to be me laying her down and her never making a sound)

The last 4 nights when I attempt to lay her down she cries.  I always give her a couple of minutes to see if she settles but go back in when she doesn't.  I'm not one who can let her cry for long periods of time.  I think I shouldn't do this but I do.....I pick her up and usually take her back to the rocking chair to rock or snuggle a bit longer.  Which in the past hasn't been  an issue, she would generally go back to her bed and on to sleep by herself in 15 or 20 minutes.  The last 4 nights it has been repeated trips to the crib and 3 of the nights it was 9pm or later before she went to bed for good.  Last night however I made the HUGE mistake of laying down with her in my bed at 9:30, which I've never done before but as we Mommys know, I was getting tired.  She went to sleep of course, which makes me feel like there isn't anything wrong with her really, she just doesn't want to go to bed, or be away from me all of a sudden??  Anyway, at 1am I decided to move her back to her bed because I do not sleep with her next to me.  I've never started that and don't want to now.  When I moved her she woke up, cried when I layed her in her bed.  I gave her a couple of minutes but had to go get her.  I again layed down with her which I know is a HUGE no no but I didn't know what else to do.  She would not go back to sleep this time though.  She wrestled and played in the bed for almost an hour so I then took her back to her bed.  This was around 2am.  She layed down and didn't make a sound.  I began to celebrate and drift off myself but heard her in about 20 minutes start fussing.  I let her fuss this time for almost 10 minutes.  She wasn't really crying, just randomly voicing her dislike.  She did however work up into crying so I again went back to get her.  It's nearing 3am at this point and I still haven't been to sleep.  She finally fell asleep around 4am nestled up in my arm.  HELP ME PLEASE???  I don't want to make a night like this a normal routine around here.  She's been soooooooooo easy up until these last few days that I'm just totally lost as to what is going on or what I should do differently.    I'm wondering if she's napping too much during the day?  Is she needing less nap time?  I wouldn't think she would take both morning and afternoon nap so easily if she didn't need them?  Any advice will be GREATLY appreciated.

[anna*]

I think she's not tired enough. By this age almost all babies are moving towards one nap - although not necessarily there yet. She has really low A times for her age. I would push her first nap out to 4 hrs after waking, and cap it at 30 mins, and then a second nap a couple hours later, and make sure she is up by 3pm. So your EASY might look like

6.30am A
10.30am S
11am A
1pm S
3pm A
7pm S

What do you think? Then maybe in a month or two you can look at dropping the am nap and bringing the pm nap forward to 11.30 or 12.

[Avamama75]

Thanks for the advice!   I was also wondering if she was sleeping too much during the day and I am more than willing to try anything at this point.  She got up today around 6:45........so that means I should hold her off for nap until 10:45?  We'll see how it goes, she's tired already this morning but that is most likely from her "up most of the night" business.   Thanks again!

[Avamama75]

Hi again!  She made it until 10:10 which wasn't quite 4 hours but I could see that she was getting super sleepy.  Of course she didn't sleep what I would consider a good night's rest last night so maybe she's extra tired already?  I have family coming this afternoon right around the time she would go down for the 2nd nap.  I'm thinking of letting her just sleep as long as she will now (she went down without a fuss) because I know an afternoon nap probably won't be happening.  I hate to put her down for nap with family here that have driven just to see her.   I know that by this evening she will probably be a sleepy crabby bear but I didn't know how else to get around the "company coming over during naptime."  Hope it goes well!  Do you think an earlier bedtime tonight might work out?  If let's say she sleeps for 2 1/2 hours this morning?  I'm thinking she will probably be up by 12pm?  Tomorrow I'm hoping after a better night tonight I will do a 4 hour activity time in the morning, go for the 30 minute nap and then 2nd nap two hours later.  We don't have family coming over or anything to disrupt the nap schedule.  Wish me luck!

[Avamama75]

As I wrote yesterday we had family coming in the afternoon during what would've been nap time so I let the LO sleep from 10:00am until she woke up which was 12:15.  By 5:00pm she was falling asleep in the hi-chair.  I quickly finished up what supper she would eat, gave a fast bath, jammies on, sippy cup of milk ready.  She fell asleep in my lap at 6pm.  BUT when I went to put her down she woke up immediately and cried.  I walked out, gave her a couple of minutes but returned when the crying was hysterical.  I realize she was over tired by this point, she'd been up for 6 hours.  I've read about the pick up/put down on here which I've never really done or felt like I needed too because she's never been difficult to get to bed really.  WELL I made my mind up that I wasn't getting her and leaving the room with her.  Sooooo I began the pick up/put down.  Now, I don't know that I did it just exactly right but after 5 pick ups/put downs/walk back out the room she gave up at 7:45 and didn't make a peep until 6:15 this morning.  Today I'm doing EASY schedule you suggested yesterday.  4 hour A time this morning, followed by a 30 minute nap (which she is taking as we speak) followed by HOPEFULLY another nap at 12:30.  She will get up (or I will have to get her up I'm guessing at 10:30) so then the other nap should be 2 hours from that time?  Keep your fingers crossed!  I'm hoping and praying this adjustment to her napping gets us back on track for the "easy bedtime." 

[anna*]

That's great! Yeh, OT and overstimulated bedtunes are always hard but it sounds like you both did great.

[Avamama75]

Thanks so much!  I teach elementary school and have been off for Christmas break.  I go back to work on Monday and am hoping to get this bedtime situation fixed by then.   She's been so easy up until this last few days so I know we can get back to it.  I've kept her schedule the same even though I've been home with her.  I've made sure not to sleep too late and keep our napping/bedtime as close to normal as possible.  Then we hit this "blip" and I just wasn't sure what had happened.  Hopefully the nap time change will get us lined out!   Thank you thank you!