34-month old still a picky eater

[hanna]

Hi,

My son, who will be 3 in 2 months, has been a picky eater since he started to eat on his own, at around 12 months. Lately he sometimes won't eat anything at dinner no matter if it's something he would normally eat. He starts to play with his food and throw it on the floor. He sometimes wants me to feed him. This evening, he had 1 macaroni. I knew he had to eat something before bed so after debating what we should allow him to eat, since he said he didn't like the other food, he ate half an orange, some yogurt and lots of cereal.
I don't want battles at the table and I don't want to force him to eat his food, which you can't really do anyway. But sometimes when I have time and patience and sit next to him, and feed him or count the food etc, he'll end up eating most of his food, so it's hard to know why he won't just eat.

Should I just let him leave the table or do I tell him he has to sit there even if he doesn't eat?
How hard should I be in trying to feed him the same meal later?
He doesn't have a big snack in the afternoon, so he's got to be hungry.

Thanks.

[Debsie2005]

Hi

I feel your stress! I also have a very sensitive (spirited) eater! And it's really hard to know what to do for the best is t it, as like you, I worry about him being hungry in the night :-( my son has never been a good sleeper so Ive always worried more about him being hungry in the night as it might make nights worse! Up until this last week, I used to wait a while and the offer toast, in the hope that he wouldn't see it as a replacement. However this week, he very cheekily refused his dinner and then asked for toast!!! I decided this week I would not give him a alternative. He just had milk as usual.

The advice in a book I have on spirited children (not sure if yours is) and I imagine most fussy eaters, is that you are in charge of what to offer them to eat and they are in charge of what or whether they eat it. That's all we can do! It says if they're sensitive then to offer a variety on their plate with at least 1 thing you know they'll eat. Sadly this doesn't work well for us! The other day at a toddler group, I put a few bits of fruit and a couple of breadsticks on a plate. I showed DS the plate and asked if he wanted anything. He picked up a breadstick, but it had touched a bit of pear and was slightly damp. He put it straight back and wouldn't touch anything. Sigh! Other times he will refuse his dinner if I've put a couple of carrots on the side. He also refuses anything he's not seen before, he's not a trier!! Sometimes I wonder, if I just let him get there in his own time, he will but then if I don't offer loads of variety, he won't ever get there! W

Anyway I'm sorry if I've rambled and not been much help! I just wanted to say I understand and it's not easy. Ill be following this thread for others advice too!!

[hanna]

Thanks,

That sound a lot like my son with not trying new food. It's difficult to increase the variety when he won't try. If I put a tomato or a piece of carrot on his plate, he will either throw it on the floor or give it to me. He loves rice and corn, bread, pancakes and some meat. Sometimes he'll eat hotdogs or fish but not always. I worry he's not getting all the vitamins he needs.

I've started to give him none or just a little snack in the afternoon. That seems to help at dinner time. I also limit his juice intake.

Do I let him leave the table if he's not eating? If we are sitting down together I don't think he should just go and play. He used to with a fork and or a spoon. Now he mostly wants to use his hands, depending on the food.

I got him to try Pediasure but he wasn't to interested..