The Child Won't Nap!

[BabyBaggage]

 I'm losing my mind...

This is DS#2.  He is 12 weeks now. My first followed EASY to a T. We went through a few weeks where he only catnapped, but I figured him out quickly and the rest was a piece of cake. Classic textbook...maybe even angelic. 

This one...sheesh.

I have tried it all. Swaddle, no swaddle, bouncing, jiggling, swaying, rocking, dark room, white noise, no white noise, sssh/pat, crying it out...I feed him, I change him, we walk around...

You get the picture, right?

I've been able to get him to fall asleep, but it lasts 30 mins. Yesterday I managed a 1.5 hr nap. I've seen a couple 3 or 4 hour naps, but they are few and far between. We are all over the map!

I can tell he's tired. He wakes after 30 minutes crying and yawning. If I pick him up, he stops crying and rubs his face in my chest. He is exhausted...but then smiles and coos. He has recently found his hands and seems a bit obsessed with them right now. Haha.

He has been sleeping through the night since 2 weeks at least. It's the only sane time in my house. The past couple nights he has been down around 7:30 and sleeps until 6-6:30am. He used to go right back to bed after his first feed and sleep for a couple hours, but nowhere seems too alert in the morning. Plus, he still wouldn't really sleep the rest of the day so I thought I was doing something wrong.  I had a couple days where 1hr40mins was the magic A time and he had 3 naps in the day. But that changed quickly. I've tried reducing the first A time to 1hr20mins and it did nothing. I've tried less stimulation...more stimulation....bottles of formula...I've honestly tried it all to find the magic key and nothing is helping.

I'm so frustrated and feel guilty because my 3.5 year old keeps getting neglected when he's home with me.

I'd love to post our EASY schedule, but, as I said, we are all over the map. I just can't figure him out.

Please, please, please help. This has been going on for at least 6 or 7 weeks now.

[ZacsMumme]

How is he during the day? Do you feel there is any discomfort?
If not, it's likely a bit developmental, maybe OT as well or OS.
What is the first A time you are aiming for? - what is his personality type?

[BabyBaggage]

How is he during the day? Do you feel there is any discomfort?
If not, it's likely a bit developmental, maybe OT as well or OS.
What is the first A time you are aiming for? - what is his personality type?

He's not awful. Sometimes he will sit on his own for awhile...other times he wants to just be held.  He is full of smiles when I get him up, but he wakes up from his 30 min screaming, yawning, and rubbing his eyes in my chest. By the end of the day, he looks exhausted and his eyes are all red around them.

Maybe you're right. It's probably developmental. He's a pretty easy going baby...seems pretty textbook. I guess I'm just worried he isn't getting enough sleep during the day, and, as I mentioned, I hate that my 3.5 year old cant get his needs met because I seem to always have my hands full.

I had a couple days where 1hr40mins worked, but then that stopped. I've tried variations between 1hr to 2 hours for A.

For example, today- he woke just before 5am (though he doesn't do this often-usually its around 6-6:30am) ate, and went right back to bed until 8am. He was fully awake until about 5:30am...probably about 40mins or so. He was completely awake when I placed him in bed and he drifted off without a peep. So would that be a nap or a continuation of night sleep?  He went to bed just before 7:30 last night.

Then after he woke, he had his first yawn at 8:30am. It was only half an hour after he got up!  I stretched A time out for 1hr 20 mins. There were no more yawns and he sat quietly in his bouncy chair for a bit, so he didn't seem tired. I started to wind him down as soon as he started to fuss a little. He cried and squirmed in my arms while I did sshh/pat for maybe 5 mins, then I placed him in his crib when he calmed at had heavy eyes. I turned him on his side, continued sssh/pat for maybe another minute and he was out.

30mins later he was awake. This time he didn't wake screaming. I tried to sssh/pat him back, but he was wide awake and smiley so I got him up and started back at E. He seems quite happy playing under his gym mat now, so I'll see how the next nap goes.

[ZacsMumme]

That small A would be a continuation of night sleep

This is a rubbish Time for naps. You could try a cheeky w2s. Around the 20/23 min mark, it may not work though.
Have you ever snuck in to see how he is waking, if you catch him quick you could try popping the paci in (if you use one) or starting the shh/pat or apply pressure early on.

What are you doing in A time, keep him away from the TV if possible

[BabyBaggage]

So he has had 2 more 30 min naps since the first. He has now been up for 8 hours with only 1.5hrs of sleep altogether. I've had more luck today texting him down. He hasn't done much crying to go down and has fallen asleep quickly with some patting in bed. Now that the day is almost done, he is at the point where he is falling asleep while eating now. He's just too tired to stay awake and he will now have a harder time with being put down and will want to be carried.

He used to take a pacifier but now he just chews on it.

A time usually just consists of a diaper change, some facial/oral mimicking, laying under his gym mat (I've removed most of the dangling toys and left only a couple in his line of sight), the bouncy chair (I'm keeping lights/music/vibration off), or his swing (no lights or music)- he usually just stares at the privet point of the swing and chews on his hands. I don't do all of these activities in one A. I pick something and only switch him when he seems to fuss (ie. boredom?).  We havent really had the tv on either since ive been limiting the amount of time my other son watches it. I spend some time near the end winding down by swaddling him and walking around and talking quietly to him or singing. Once he seems pretty mellow and has stopped fidgeting we sit in the dark room for a bit before going into the crib. The winding down time usually takes but 15-20 mins.

[ZacsMumme]

Hugs, so tough. 12 weeks is a developmental leap too so this could be making things worse.
http://www.thewonderweeks.com/index.php/about-the-wonder-weeks/your-babys-10-leaps/mental-leap-3
I would try sticking with 1 first A time for 3-5 days maybe try 1hr40 (start WD at 1hr25/30) as it worked well before? - if you get a short nap and can't resettle try 1hr25 for the next one to prevent OT

[BabyBaggage]

Thanks so much ZM!

That developmental leap makes a lot of sense actually. I noticed this idea on two occasions this week. Once, I caught him practicing bringing his fist to his mouth. He repeated it over and over and over. Another time he was nursing and kept sliding his hand back and forth along my arm and watched how it moved.  Come to think of it, he has noticed the cat too....hmmm...

[ZacsMumme]

The wonder weeks developmental leaps were crazy for my first. He's touchy and was the 3 Cs all the time for a week. Then suddenly bam, he was doing new stuff! Amazing aye I have the iPad app for it. It's great!