Not enjoying BF anymore - 5 weeks and becoming increasingly difficult

[Dairy Queen]

I am not sure this is the right place to post… but I read the FAQs on oversupply and forceful letdown and I think all my troubles might stem from BF.

DS was an angel for the first 3 weeks.  Good naps.  On EASY right from the start.  Gaining lots of weight.  BF was simple, just like with my 2 older children.  At 4 weeks, he started fussing in the evenings and would bob off the breast, cry and then continue to feed.  We noticed he burped and passed gas a lot so we assumed it was digestive troubles and elevated the top of the bed.

Now, for the past 4 days (week 5), BF has become really difficult.  For the daytime feeds, as soon as I have my letdown (some trickling and spraying), he’ll cry so hard his face will become totally red.  Then I spend the next hour calming him, patting him on the back, burping him and BF him (but he’ll only take 2 minutes at a time, and then the crying-calming cycle starts again).  He used to do this for the 6 pm feed only, then he added the 4pm feed, but now, it’s all daytime feeds.  No issues with NFeeds though, thank God! 

I tried different holds and the one where he lies on top me, or I am lying back, typically involves less crying (less clicking sound, better latch), but he also tends to fall asleep on the breast with this one and then won’t take a full feed (my breast will still seem fairly full).  Then I can’t get him to burp because he is in a deep sleep, I put him to bed only to have him wake up screaming less than 20 minutes later.  It totally throws off our EASY routine and then I have no clue why he is crying anymore (fatigue, hunger, overfeeding, gas etc) and our cycles vary from 3 hours, to 2 to sometimes 90 minutes!

I am assuming a forceful let-down is the culprit (thus causing the gas) so I also try to calm myself using breathing techniques during the letdown, and even get him off the breast during letdown (letdowns happened about 4-5 times during our previous ‘good’ feeds) which used to last about 20 minutes.

I’m getting really discouraged and now dread BFing!  In my mind (and probably is DS as well) BF is now being associated with crying and pain… instead of pleasure, bonding and comfort 

Now… my question… why is this suddenly happening?  Everything seemed fine with the BF at the beginning… why now, and what else can I do about it?  Not sure how much longer I can tolerate this 

Sherry

[*Ali*]

Hugs. that does sound tough.

Do you think he could have reflux? Check out this link for the symptoms Reflux 101 - General reflux information

[becj86]

I had issues with oversupply after growth spurts and that would make the over active letdown worse. Reclining to feed did help, I used to stoke DS' jawline to stimulate sucking and keep him awake to take a feed.

Agree with Ali, worth looking into reflux. OS/OALD often has similar symptoms. I know if I'd posted with DS' issues early on, I'd have had reflux suggested.

[Dairy Queen]

Thanks for the support.  I'll check out the reflux info.  Wish me luck for the evenings (they are the worst)!!

[*Ali*]

Are you doing all the things suggested in the FAQs like laid back nursing and catching the first flow in a towel?

[Dairy Queen]

The laid back position helps, definitely; crying still occurs but less frequently during the actual feed.  Feeds are now 2 hours apart though and putting him down for a nap is getting more and more difficult :-(

Also given that the new position requires way more effort, feeds now take 30 minutes (at least) whereas they used to be 10-20 min max.  Is this normal?  He also really often falls asleep on the boob because of this.

Question for you regarding reflux: would it just appear at 5 weeks if it happens to be a physiological issue?  I would think the symptoms would have been present right from birth, no?

[*Ali*]

No, reflux rarely shows from birth.  I'm sure I read that 6wo is the prime time for symptoms to emerge but hopefully someone more knowledgeable will confirm. Maybe because babies are more sleepy in the first few weeks?

[becj86]

It's about that age, Ali. Something to do with the damage from the acid getting worse and the flux hurting more on damaged innards than nice new ones, I think.

[C&B&E]

Yep, I've got two refluxers and although there were tell tale signs earlier on, it was after a few weeks that things got tough.  I have OALD too and with my DS I spent ages thinking that was causing the problem (screaming, gagging at the breast) but although it was not helping it was the reflux that was causing the real difficulties.  Once he was on meds the feeding improved, though we still had to work on it.  Wet hiccups, feeding difficulties, irritability, and struggling to sleep flat are some of the most telltale signs of reflux. 

[Fiver]

Agreed. Around 6w is when we noticed something was up with DS too

[Dairy Queen]

Ok, so I tried implementing as many of the tips as posible for both OALD, OS and Reflux as possible and today was a little better in that the crying episodes have decreased somewhat during the day and disappeared totally during the actual BFing, which is great!! Thank you!!  Thank you!!

These changes have impacted our routine.  Right now, I feed him once when he gets up from his nap (Australian position) and he sucks really hard and now the feed takes significantly longer (usualyl 15 minutes, and now takes 45 minutes).  Then, by the time I change him and burp him and put him down, he is hungry again and will try to fall asleep and then start showing all the hunger signs.  This is 2 hours from the 1st feed.  He'll then take another full feed.  Not just playing and suckling.  A full 30 minutes of drinking and swallowing.  Then, he'll have a longer nap (he might wake a few times, but I can generally tell that he is still tired and put him back to sleep).  Besides, he can't be too comfortable on a big full stomach!

I am wondering whether this is a result of the position?  Is he just using up a lot more enegry and therefore needing more calories?

Could it be his growth spurt already or is it too early?  He is 5 weeks and 2 days as of today...

Thanks again!

[becj86]

Could be a growth spurt, could be refluxing at that time after the feed and wanting to feed again for comfort, could also be that his tired cues are so similar to his hunger cues that you're confusing them. I know I did for ages. He is young though, so he could still be needing to feed that frequently.

He's probably pretty tired by 2hr from when he woke up and most babies this age are eating, having a nappy change and going back to bed, so they're only up for an hour and a bit between sleeps.

It's a good sign that the feed is taking longer, he's working for it rather than having his milk squirted at him at a rate faster than he can cope with. He will get faster.

[Dairy Queen]

I try to put him down when I first see signs of fatigue (about 55 minutes after he wakes) and then I swaddle and put him in his crib, sing a lullaby and then he closes his eyes only to open them 5 minutes later.  I pat hum gently and he goes back to sleep for another couple of minutes and then it continues 5-6 times until he gets really fussy and starts crying.  Then I feed him and by then, he's been up for 2 full hours!

I know it's really long for a newborn... But not sure what else to do?

[becj86]

Do you have any sure fire way to help him get to sleep? Sounds like he's wanting to sleep and not able to and then crying harder because he's OT. At this age, APing is fine, especially when he's possibly in pain, I'd say the difficulty sleeping for more than 5-6min at a time is related to discomfort.

[becj86]

accidental parenting, just whatever works.