Help. 8 month old SCREAMS & SCREAMS at nap times

[dollster]

I'm really needing some help with my 8 month old dd who has recently started absolutely freaking out at nap times.  Not crying, really really screaming like your hurting her and needs total comfort.

About a month ago my dd was still waking up 3-4 times at night, so with help from the PU/PD boards, she is now only waking up once a night for a feed (yay!).  However, since her night sleeping has gotten better, her day naps have progressively got worse.  It's been the worst in the last two weeks.  She starts crying before we even go through her bedroom door at nap time and then literally screams at the top of her lungs when I put her into her cot, has real tears, looks totally fearful in her cot and is almost beside herself.  I've tried shush/pat, but she doesn't even stop screaming when I pick her up.   In the end, I'm so worried something is wrong, that I just either get her up and forget the nap or feed her to sleep. 

Prior to 2 weeks ago she was a totally independant sleeper with no props and almost never cried going to nap time.  She still goes to bed at night independantly and almost no crying.

I'm quite stressed and feel terrible for my 3 yr old who is also getting upset by the crying and screaming. 

I have no idea what to do.  She is also waking up earlier and earlier in the am, so pehaps a routine tweak is needed???

Here is her EASY from today
5:30am Wake up
8:45am Tried for 1/2 hour to get her for nap, but she screamed the whole time.  My 3year old was very upset, so got dd up for 10mins and then feed her to sleep
9:30-12noon Nap
3pm - Tried again to get her for nap, but screaming again for 1/2 hour.  Husband took her for walk and she feel asleep
3:30-4pm nap in pram
6:30 bedtime

please, any help would be appreciated!

[amayzie]

Hmm- what a tough situation!! Look- i'm wondering if she might be undertired going into those naps. The A time isn't overly high for her age. the crying might be more about her not being anywhere near tired enough rather than a settling probelm- especially as you say she's been independent. Can you try pushing the A times up by about 15 minutes or so and see if it helps things at all? It COULD help with the EW as well- 5.30 is a pretty awful time for you all to be up for the day!

[dollster]

Thanks for reply Amayzie.  Today was terrible.  I feel like my head is going to explode. 

So she woke at 5:45am.  Tried to put for nap at 9:15am (3 1/2 hour A time) and she just screamed again.  My husband tried to shush/pat and tried to comfort her, but she just got so worked up it was unbearable.  So, again I fed her to sleep and she slept for 1 1/2 hours. 

Then after another 3 1/2 hrs A time (she wasn't looking very tired, but I am so nervous of OT) I tried to put for nap, but again screamed the house down.  Tried to take her for a walk in pram but didn't fall asleep and then ended up screaming all the way down the street on the way home.  Put her to bed at 5:30pm.   She has woken at 7:00pm and 8:30pm, but both times just cried out once and then went back to sleep....

It's getting very stressful for everyone and I'm dreading every nap time now...

Will try and push out her A times by another 15mins and see if that helps.  That means her A time will be 3 3/4 hours - is this right for her age (8.5months)?

thanks again for your reply.

[amayzie]

at 8 months they can manage A times that are quite high- so that sounds fine. Also they tend to be more resiliant and less affected by OT, so dont panic if te nap is short

[dollster]

Hi again.  so things have been going better over the last few days since I followed your advice and pushed A times out.  Her first nap she goes down without too much fussing.  Her pm nap is still a bit more difficult but eventually she goes to sleep with more mantra crying than too much full on crying.  However, a couple of things.  Her pm naps are only about 30 mins plus she is still waking up very early 5:30am.  She also keep waking quite a bit at night (ie 11:30pm shush/pat to sleep.  1:30am feed.  5:30am awake)

I've pushed her A times out to 3 1/2 hours - 3 3/4 hours now.

I'm sure there is some links on here about how to deal with early wake ups, but can't seem to find them...

thanks

[dollster]

Arhh,  something is still not right, despite a couple of days which were better.

Her am nap is still good, but she is still screaming at her pm nap. 

What do I do??

Her EASY is now looking like this
5:30-6 am wake (A time3 3 3/4 hours)
9:45-11:30 nap
3:00 pm Try to put down for pm nap, but screams her head off.  End up either taking for a walk in pram or feeding to sleep.  Normally naps for 30 mins.  Or if goes to sleep in crib, nap is still only about 30mins.
6- 6:30 bedtime
She then wakes at 1:30am for a feed.

I'm wondering if I cap her am nap to 1 1/2 max and then maybe she will be more ready for pm nap??  but just concerned that her pm naps are only 30mins which indicates UT?

Any ideas appreciated!

[dollster]

any help?

Naps are still bad.  She screams and screams almost every nap still.  Even if I sit right next to the cot and try shush/pat etc etc.  I feel quite stressed about it.

[*Becky*]

Hi,
Is the am nap still ok?
Any signs of teeth or discomfort at all?
I f things improved when you pushed the A time I would be inclined to say she is UT for the pm nap but not if she is screaming for both naps.

[amayzie]

How is she during the A time? upset? does she only scream around nap/sleep time?

[skatty]

Have you ruled out pain? Could she be teething and if so could she be having ear pain when she is laid down? It may be worth trying to medicate  30/45 mins before a nap and see if it makes any difference.