Very inconsistent nights with 10mo

[lcron]

Hi there
I've referred to this website so many times over the past 10 months however have never posted. But am now desperate for a full nights sleep so am sharing my difficulties in the hope someone might be able to help me out 
My LO is 10mo in 3 days and apart from the very odd occasion has never got into the 7-7 sleep routine. I never know what our night's are going to be like. Some nights she'll wake about 1am and be awake for 2 hours and other nights she'll sleep through until 5am but will be up for the day. When she wakes at night I'm not feeding her (she's EBF) but will do a feed if she wakes at 5am or later. I use a dummy which she can replug herself. When she wakes in the night she will initially just fuss but then after about 30 mins tends to start crying. When I go into her she's standing at the cot end and stops crying the moment she sees me. I then lay her down with her dummy and she'll be silent but 5 minutes later the cycle starts again.
This is our daily routine:
E: 5.30/6 EBF (usually put her back to bed and she'll either go back to sleep or play in cot)
E: 7am (solids)
A: approx 3 hours
S: Between 9 and 10 (depends if she's been awake since 5 or 7. I try not to put her to bed before 9)
E: 10.45/11 Snack
E: 12.30 Lunch and breast feed
A: Approx 3 1/2 hours
S: 2.30pm
E: 4pm (snack)
E: 5.30 (dinner
A: 6pm bath
E: 6.30 breastfeed
S: 7pm

This is a usual day give or take 30mins here and there. She is always asleep by 7.30pm and is an independent sleeper both during the day and night. She settles easily for most naps although will take about 5 minutes to wind down.
I just can't seem to understand why sometimes she wakes at night and other nights she has an early waking. It doesn't seem to matter what we do in our day but if there's anything that you can see needs changing please let me know.
Sorry to have babbled on but I wanted to try and include everything!
Thanks for any help 

[PaulsMom]

Hi there and welcome!

Hugs for the nw's and ew's. 

Around this age sleep can get a bit crazy as bubs get ready to drop a nap, mixed with some developmental stuff.  Here is some info 10/11 month old sleep gone wonky? Read this first!

In reviewing your routine, I'm assuming that your dd is taking a 1 hr am nap and a 1.5 hr pm nap?  Her first a is a bit short so I'm wondering if you can bump it put a bit so that eventually she will be up for closer to 4 hrs which is more common for babies of this age.  Her am nap can be shortened to 45 min.  I would leave her second A as is (or even shorten it just a bit) since she won't be as well rested from the short am nap.

To deal with developmental stuff, let her practice lots during the day (this will also ensure her body is physically tired at bt ). 

HTH

[lcron]

Thank you so much for your reply. That link was really helpful so will look at lengthening the morning A time tomorrow. Fingers crossed we start to see some changes in a few days 

[newbabe]

Hi... Interested in how your LO is doing now.. Same prob here but my DD younger (8 mts).. I'll post separately as age difference..
Hugs and understanding :-(

[lcron]

Well so far we've had two days on our new regime. First night was amazing! DD didn't wake until 4.20am then went back to sleep until 6.30  Last night she woke briefly at 10.45 then again at 4.50. She wouldn't settle so I gave her a quick feed then she went back to sleep until 7.30! Am just so happy about not having the long night wakings that although we're still getting some early morning ones I really don't mind. We'll work on those next 
I've been only allowing DD to sleep 45-1 hour max in the mornings so by 1.30pm she's ready for her arvo nap. She'll usually only sleep about 1 1/2 hours sometimes only an hour in the arvo so she's very ready for bed and will fall asleep instantly at 7pm. Think I'm going to wake her if she sleeps past 7 in the morning though otherwise her morning nap will get really late which will push the arvo nap back and I think she needs that longer awake time before BT IYKWIM.
So far we're seeing improvements so definately think the nap tweaking is helping. I still don't like waking a sleeping baby though and there's far less 'me' time  But would prefer a full nights sleep at this stage!

Hope you get to see some good changes too 

[PaulsMom]

Yay! Great update!  Follow this routine for a week or so and if she's still ew then we can try to tweak the routine a bit more.  I agree with waking her around 7 am otherwise things do get pushed out.  Totally know what you mean about waking a sleeping baby!

[lcron]

Hi there
Just wondering if you're able to offer any further advice. Our nights have been good since tweaking our routine. Still getting some EW and although I'm usually able to get DD back to sleep I wonder if there's anything else I could be doing to stop these? I was also just wondering how I keep extending her A time as I'm not sure how to fit everything into our day and still keep our 7pm BT. I'm waking her after each nap....is this ok or should I sometimes let her sleep as long as she wants?
Our current routine looks like this:
W 4.30 (went back to sleep after an hour awake time!)
GU 7
E 7.30
A 2.45/3 hours
S 9.50 - 10.40
E Snack then lunch
A 3-3 1/2 hours
S 2-3.15 (put her down at 1.40 but didn't go to sleep until 2)
E Snack then dinner at 5.30
A 3 1/5 - 4 hours
S BT 6.45/7

Does this look ok or should I be changing anything. I know she needs a longer A time before bed but she isn't ready for sleep before 1.45pm so I'm waking her just after 3pm.
Let me know if I should be posting this somewhere else but thought I'd start here as you've been so helpful so wanted to see if you have any more wise advice 
Thanks.

[PaulsMom]

So glad your nights are better.  I agree that the A time needs an increase.  Probably the best way to do this is to cap the am nap to around 40 min and then see if she will go for her 2 nap 3 hrs later.  Since she didn't have a fully restorative nap, she may be more tired and nap better in the afternoon.  This should bring the pm nap forward leaving a longer A until bt. 

There are also some sample routines you can look at chronological EASY samples, 10-12 months. 

[lcron]

Thanks for your advice. I tried it today but DD still seemed to fight the arvo nap and again didn't go to sleep until 2pm. She's still asleep now but will wake her by 3.30 so she would've had a 1.5hr sleep. Will see how well she settles at BT. I think tomorrow I may even just try a 30min morning nap and see if that makes a difference. Will keep you posted