21 mo NW for hours!

[ccue89]

Hello,
I need some assistance! Recently, my 21 month old daughter has been waking up in the middle of the night and is fighting going back down to sleep. She started sleeping through the night about a year ago, and for the most part, she has always slept through, or if she did wake up, it was a quick binkie pop in and lay her back down and that was it. Lately, she's waking up and screaming, and will stay up for upwards of a half hour- crying the whole time. The last 2 nights have been terrible! On Saturday night, she was awake for 3 hours- from 1-4am SCREAMING. Nothing I could do would soothe her. I generally try to keep her in her crib and not pull her into my bed, but I even offered that, and she didn't want anything to do with it. My DH eventually got her to sleep by shushing her for about a half hour. Last night was more of the same (up from 2:30-4:30am). I went in and replaced her lovies and binkies multiple times, but ended up just having to let her cry it out. When I would go in, she would immediately quiet down, but as soon as I would turn to leave, a blood-curddling scream would errupt from her.

Her EASY looks like this:
wake: 7:30ish (milk and a small graham cracker to follow)
breakfast: 9am
activity:9-11:30 (snack mid morning)
Lunch 12pm (light play to follow)
nap: 1-1:30pm to 3ish (milk and snack when wake up)
dinner: 6pm
quiet play, bath every other night
bedtime routine: 7-7:15
In bed 7:15-7:30. Usually plays in her crib for about an hour or so.

Any assistance is appreciated! The last couple of nights have been terrible for everyone. I don't mind waking up with her once in a while during the night, but 2+ hours of screaming is hard on everyone. I know she knows how to fall back to sleep on her own, I just need some suggestions on how to remind her how to do it.

When I go into her room in the middle of the night, I always tell her its still time for night-night and mommy and daddy are just in the other room, I love you. I try to remain calm (no matter how frustrated I feel inside!) and speak gently and quietly to her.

Thanks!
Cara

[Buttonbobs]

Hi there Cara. To be honest your routine looks good. Any chance she's teething? We've had awful wakings the last month or so with my 22MO and I'm fairly sure it's teething related. Could you try medicated to see if that helps her to settle?

[ccue89]

It's possible, but I'm not sure. She has all of her teeth except for her 2-year molars and she's giving me no other indication that she might be bothered by her teeth. Also, the other night we preemptivly dosed her with Motrin and she still screamed for 2 hours! I was hoping for that to help.

The good news is last night she slept for 12 straight hours (7:30-7:30) so we're all feeling a bit more rested this morning. I just wish I knew what tonight was going to bring!

Thanks!

[Buttonbobs]

It could be a bit of OT together with the teething, so perhaps the meds on their own weren't enough. Maybe try again tonight?

[ccue89]

I'll give the Tylenol a try next time she wakes up. She woke up last night around 10 and it took her about 20 mins to settle back down.

How do you recommend correcting the OT? I wish she would settle down sooner after I put her to bed, but how do I facilitate this? Our routine is to read a couple books, sing a special song, then sit together and say good night to everyone in our family. I put her in her crib awake, tell her I love her and leave. There is a ladybug light that projects stars on the ceiling I turn on also. Overall I would say that the routine takes about 15-20 minutes. She is then awake in her bed for up to an hour or so. Generally quiet and happy in there, but awake.

Thanks-
Cara

[Buttonbobs]

Hi again, I totally missed from your first message that she wasn't actually sleeping at BT until about 8.30, sorry for this. This could make quite a difference.

At this age and with a good 1.5-2 hr nap, a twelve hour day might not be long enough. It's possible that she's going to bed UT but by the time she actually goes to sleep she is a little OT. Could you try starting the BT routine half and hour later and seeing if this makes a difference? My DD is 22 MO and we have been in a phase of moving BT later for a while to preserve sleep in the day and at night.

Alternatively, you could think about capping the nap a little if she prefers a 12 hour night and shorter nap. This could essentially be the very start of the 1-0 transition, but very early days so no need to do anything too dramatic.
Have you read this: The 1-0 transition...Advice and Tips to help you through.

Whatever you decide to do I wouldn't necessarily change too much too drastically, perhaps a bit of tweaking a this point will be enough. What do you think?

[ccue89]

I wasn't sure if she was ready for a later bedtime, but I think we'll give that a try. I really think she needs the 1.5 hour nap during the day- and I'm not quite ready to start phasing that out!- but it makes sense that maybe by now she needs a little bit later of a bedtime. Hopefully she'll fall asleep faster if she's more tired.

Thanks!

[Buttonbobs]

Let me know how you get on x

[ccue89]

So for the past few nights we've move bedtime to 7:45 and have worked to give her a bit more of a wind down period before putting her to bed, but it's still taking her upwards of an hour to fall asleep. The good news is that she is barely crying anymore and seems very content in her crib up until the time she falls asleep. She has also been sleeping through the night for the past 6 days or so which has been great. Maybe she just needs the extra time to quiet herself down at night?  I don't want her OT but I'm not sure how else to attack the problem.
Thanks!

[Buttonbobs]

I would say if you're getting a good stretch of sleep at night time and she is not crying before sleep then that is an improvement. I would stick with what you have unless the situation deteriorates again or if she becomes OT overtime. Hugs xx