Settling My Squirmy Worm!

[katiej9781]

My Textbook DD will be 12 weeks on Sunday. She's on a pretty solid 3.5/4 hour EASY, but like so many others, we've always struggled with wakeups at the 20 or 45 minute mark. This is of course throwing us into the OT cycle, which results in APOP to get her to sleep, which then creates even more problems!

The main issue I am seeing when she wakes mid-nap is that she has to pass wind and squirms and kicks her legs out until she is able to relieve it. This activity mid-nap pretty much wakes her up fully, and often times she can't relive the wind on her own and needs to nurse to pass it. She is EBF and I swear I have tried everything under the sun (shield to slow let down, burping, massage, simethicone, colic calm, etc) to no avail. My next step is to cut all dairy from my diet and try a probiotic for her to see if that helps. I should clarify she is not in pain when this happens (stomach gas bubbles/reflux)...just needs to push it out on her own and doesn't totally have the ability to do that yet! This is where the APOP comes into play as I sometimes nurse her to help her pass it and calm her down enough to finish out her nap...

Has anyone out there had this problem? It does not seem to bother her in the least during her A time. I go back to work next week and am really hoping to see some progress with all the work I have put in to get her in a good routine. I can't expect the sitter to feed her in the middle of every nap, but s far this has prevented us making much progress with her self-settling.

[jmwahlberg]

Can you post your EASY schedule for us?

Your LO could be overtired. Mine did the same thing and would wake up crying, swallowing air needing a burp, and could not settle on his own. We first burped him then laid him back down and sh/patted him back to sleep, every nap until we figured out the right awake time for him... Also, feeding mid nap could be the reason your LO has an upset tummy. They need a few hours to digest, and if you are feeding mid nap, and again when they wake up it can cause gas/upset tummies. Try your best not to feed mid nap and see where it takes you.

[katiej9781]

We are striving for the following EASY, although the mid nap wakings are proving it difficult! I do try to stick to only 1 hr/1:20 min A times after a feeding...but obviously there is additional awake time when she wakes early from her nap. In these cases I try to let her feed more leisurely or stay dozed off a bit post feed to "catch her up" on missed time from her nap. I know it's not exactly restorative sleep, but it does help with OT.

6:00 wake (E)
(A) 6:30-7:30
(S) 7:45 - 10:00*
(E) 10:00
(A) 10:30-11:30
(S) 11:45 - 2:00*
(E) 2:00 - 2:30
(A) 2:30 - 3:30
(S) 3:45 - 6:00**
(E) 6:00-6:30
(A) 6:30 - 7:30
(E) 7:30
(S) 8:00
DF @ 10:30/11:00
Up once to eat at night...
-----
* these are the naps we struggle most with at the 45 min mark. I don't usually nurse her back to sleep...only when she is exceptionally uncomfortable and needs to pass that gas. I've been APOP (holding, paci) to get her back to sleep to finish out these S times
** this late afternoon nap is NEVER continuous. We usually need to leave the house around this time to pick up DD1, so she will doze off and on during this time in the stroller/carrier/etc.

She's a bit on the young side for the 4 hour EASY, so I let things shift a half hour in either direction to account for hunger or other cues. She doesn't seem to have any other GI issues that would lead me to think this was reflux or anything, but she just can't seem to work through it on her own

[brummum]

Hi there, it's really common for little ones to struggle with sleep cycle transitions at this age so don't worry too much. How does she go to sleep? Are the first 2 naps in her cot/crib? Does she go down awake or is she fed/rocked to sleep etc..? If she has something she depends on to go to sleep when she stirs between sleep cycles she will probably want/need that to go back to sleep again.

Is she swaddled? I'm wondering whether a nice tight swaddle would help to damped down her movements and prevent them waking her fully during transitions. Silly question but are you winding thoroughly after feeding? We had to experiment with several different ways of winding as our little guy was very gassy. We found cycling leg actions during changes helped too. Even if you don't think there is any reflux going on it might be worth elevating the head end of her crib to encourage air being released.

The only other thing I'm thinking from looking at your routine is whether she is getting a little overtired. Little ones tend to struggle more with transitions in sleep cycles if they are overtired/undertired. The 'average' awake time for a 12 week old would be 1:20-1:30 so hers at 1:45 might be a little long. Have you tried putting her down slightly earlier? She also has a 14hr day. At this age you would be aiming for a 12hr day (give or take, some babies mine included, never do 12hr nights) with 2 long naps (1.5hr+) and a catnap late afternoon of around 45mins. I wonder if getting her down slightly earlier might help her get a bit more restorative night sleep making her more rested which usually has a positive effect on naps.

Just my thoughts hon. What do you think?

[brummum]

Tons of Wind! What makes this happen and what to do?

just saw this and thought of you, some more useful suggestions

[katiej9781]

Thanks very much, I will check that out. Here's some clarification on stuff I missed...

She is swaddled, which helps with her flailing arms, but not too much for scrunching up her legs which is what she does when she's trying to expel the gas.

Her A times are only an hour each, 1 hour 20 minutes tops. I usually take her upstairs at that time, change her diaper, swaddle, and then hold her until she's drowsy. Lately though the wind combined with OT makes it harder to get her to sleep, so sometimes in those cases I will rock her until she's down. She has been sleeping in a newborn napper in our bedroom (like a bassinet) with the room darkened. During this difficult sleep period though I have her in a co-sleeper in our bed where she is laying flat. Each has its pros and cons...she seems more comfortable in the co-sleeper completely flat on her back, but she is able to kick her legs around more which makes it harder to get back to sleep. The napper is elevated so her legs are bent a little upward which prevents her from kicking, but it doesn't seem as comfortable for her.

I'm really just trying to get out of this APOP cycle before it becomes a "learned" dependence for her! I am also going back to work next week and would really feel more confident if I knew she was able to sleep soundly at the sitter. She is such a sweet baby too, I just feel so bad for her when I know how tired she is and how much she wants to just stay asleep!

[mariamac]

We had similar problems with our little guy. He would also wake him self up from naps by pulling his legs up to try and pass wind. Sometime he could be working hard for up to 10-15 min just pass a small one. We took him to reflexology which had a huge effect. The first time he spent the rest of the day passing wind loudly along with a lot of badly smelling poo. After the second treatment he now permanently passes gas in a more relaxed manner without pulling his legs up. Sometimes he might stir a bit during a nap but only a short while then we hear him passing the gas and he just fall right back to sleep without even waking all the way up. It might be worth trying out. It is a noninvasive treatment which a lot of children benefit from. Just my thoughts. 

[katiej9781]

Awesome, I'll see if there is something in my area

I noticed today going through our EASY that OT plays a huge part in how this condition affects her ability to settle. Her morning nap she went down without a peep, and transitioned at 20 and 45 minutes with hardly a squirm. Second nap she fussed and squirmed going down, maybe slightly OT, and then wouldn't settle at 45 minutes without some APOP. Late afternoon nap was torture to get her to just "accept" sleep, and ended up as two disjointed naps that didn't do much to help her rest. Bedtime then was a nightmare and hasn't been too restful for her since

I'm really hoping she will grow out of this or we find a solution soon. I did not start BW with DD1 until she was 5-6 months old, so I was on the ball with DD2 until we hit this roadblock. She has the sweetest demeanor, so it's been difficult to find myself frustrated with her when I know she can't help it and needs me to help her through it! I appreciate the support from everyone, thank you!

[brummum]

Have you tried being there at her transitions and lightly applying pressure to her legs to prevent the flailing waking her? We had to do this with little man and it did seem to help prevent him waking up fully during transitions. Similar to hold through the jolts.

Awake time is counted from eyes open to eyes closed, how long has she been awake for when you have completed your wind down/change etc.. and actually put her down to sleep? If it's 1-1:20 it might be possible that she's actually undertired so resists. What are her nights like? Do you have any other NW's apart from the night feed?

Was she able to go down for naps awake and fall asleep independently before this rough patch? What do you think about accidental parenting at least that last catnap? At this age we had only just started to sleep train and we would do that for the first nap but then hold/use buggy for the others to avoid him getting overtired.

[katiej9781]

Ah, I see now about the A time!

Last night I tried an experiment of putting her down 20-30 mins EARLIER than I would have normally (due to a sleepless day). Lo and behold she drifted off to sleep easily without any fussing, and despite taking a bit to settle into a deep sleep, she only woke just before her DF (I was late getting to it) and once more around 3 AM. So far this morning I've put her down earlier than I had been previously, and she fell asleep easily for both those naps too. First nap was 1:45 unassisted by me, and nap #2 is in progress and I am hoping for the same success!

Could be that I was inadverently extending her A time which was contributing to OT...I'm hoping that's the case for the restless naps!  Now to tackle the wind issue that does still unsettle her, and I appreciate all the suggestions there. In going in to see a holistic doctor that was recommended to me, and also inquire about reflexology to help her with this problem

[brummum]

All the best hon, hope things keep improving for you.