what is 'normal' for 2.5yo?

[badpixie]

Hi there
we are struggling we sleep at the moment, its a long running thing, but its recently got worse again.

We are all over the place the nearest thing we have to a routine is over a week rather than a day. Its something like this
wake up - anytime between 6 and 9!
if before 8am
try for a nap about 2/2.30 try to wake after an hour although its generally more like 1.5 by the time we have rouse him
Bed at least 6 hours from wake time, so between 9 and 10 - trying to get to bed before this just leads to bedroom hijinx because he is not ready to sleep.

if he wakes after 8, go for a nap free day bed by 11hrs after wake up time.

if rarely sleeps more than 11 hours, although after a nap free day he can, but he can't handle more than 2 or 3 of those a week and not one after another- we just tried 2 nap free days in a row and last night he was up every 3 hours which is defo OT.

he is not an independant sleeper, he has had periods where he has been, but never long lasting. The problem is he is highly spirited and tends to rev him self up until he is OT, so its just no worth leaving him alone to sleep in the long run. (he's been like this since he became mobile at 4/5 mo)

has anyone BTDT? is this something we have to ride out? Is there something we could be doing better? I've tried earlier naps, he just wont go down, we can waste hours trying. Later naps lead to later bedtimes, and longer days and OT build up. He's really bad with OT. I think he is generally LSN but he NEEDS that sleep.

Oh and he always wakes once in the early hours, but goes back to sleep. Always has. We have him on a double mattress in his own room and just go and get into bed with him so he goes back to sleep. Again the reving up thing can lead to REALLY early wake ups otherwise.

I think there may be some bad habits here, but not sure how to change things

 
thanks for reading

[*Becky*]

Hi there,
I think if it were me I would work on the independent sleep first as it can be really hard to figure out what is going on routine wise if that is not in place.
Does he have a gro-clock or similar so he knows what time it is ok to get up in the morning?
Does he go to bed at night by himself?

[badpixie]

hi Becky, thanks for your reply.

I've started GW at night since i first posted this, and it seems to be working. This is a first, because I've tried it a few times, at it's always been a disaster. Same with wiwo. He has no glo clock, he just gets up when he's awake, we can convince him to go back to sleep if we lie with him, so that's what we've always done.

He's waking every 3 hours at the moment, we are all very irritable at the mo I know I should probably leave him to resettle but we've got into the habit of just getting into bed with him at 5ish, so we are going to him whatever he time he wakes at the moment! I've installed a night light because I thought it might be because he's become scared of the dark, since his imagination seems to have kicked in recently, but it didn't work last night, he's still waking up crying that he wants me, even if I'm in bed with him!

Anyway hopefully the GW will work this time....

[becj86]

Is he exactly 2.5? L will be in 4 days' time and OMG, the sleep is AWFUL! He is going through something developmental, behaviour is shot, he cannot relax his body or his mind in order to sleep. BT has gone from a 15-20min routine to 2hr of stories, massages, cuddles, songs and then he gets so little sleep because he's awake "when the moon's gone" that the OT gets worse.

It does sound at least partly developmental from what you're describing, but independent sleep not being something he's achieved consistently yet, GW is worth another try.

[badpixie]

hi Becj86 - yes, he turned 2.5 yesterday in fact. I though maybe it was something developmental, but  I couldn't find any useful information on line. Glad to hear its not just us tho, although I don't wish it in others obvs!
I knew the independent sleep thing might become an issue eventually, but he's always been quite good at getting to sleep, taking about 15 mins. Never been good at staying aleep, which is why I came to BW in the first place. But recently he's been taking a hour to go off, which is quite annoying/boring. We go to leave the room thinking he's asleep and he's leaping out of bed grabbing our ankles and screaming! There have been periods when DP could leave him to sleep, and when I could leave him when he was almost asleep, but not at the moment.

Last night was better although he didn't go to sleep until 9:45! He woke at about 4 but resettled himself and then woke at 5.30 and was persistantly crying for me, and he was soaked. He's dry at night and refusing to wear nappies, so we have been putting him on the potty when we go into him at 5ish, but my sleep addled brain forgot about this! I should have gone and pottied him at 4 when he cried out. Then he was up for the day at 7;30 which is not enough sleep for him. Now he's gonna want a long nap which means a late night again!

Can't actually wait for him to drop this nap now, so we get our evenings back....