5 month old EASY all off kilter!

[AlanaCYK]

I successfully had our 5 month old DD on a 4 hour EASY and now the entire routine is all over the place. We were having difficulty with numerous NWs and a moderator suggested shortening her naps. We shortened them slowly and that worked for the first few nights, but now she's napping for only 30 or 45 minutes at a time which throws off her routine to the point where some days she's AEAS and other days she's SAES. Her A times are all over the place from 1 hour to 2.5 hours and I'm carefully watching her sleepy cues (yawns, fussing, scratching head). She's also now waking frequently again through the night.
I have no idea where to start to get her back on track and I'm getting so emotional because I feel like I'm failing miserably 

[jessmum46]

Aww hun, you're not failing miserably.  This is a rough age for sleep, I found 4-6 months the worst.  I'm guessing she's got quite OT if you've shortened naps for a few days in a row.  Could you post a recent day or two in EAS format so I can see where you're starting from and hopefully help you with a plan to get back on track?

Is she an independent sleeper?

[AlanaCYK]

Hi jessmum! Thanks for the reassurance - we have a 5 year old DS as well and I had forgotten how tough the ST can be (he was a spirited/textbook baby so he was always throwing us for a loop with EASY!). She is not yet an independent sleeper - she's swaddled and I'm guilty of the paci prop. I've lost count how many times I've tried shh/pat when she wakes early from a nap, but she escalates from sleepy cry to full on awake crying when I tilt her to the side to pat her back. I've tried patting her arm or chest, but no luck and I end up resorting to the paci.
Here was today's EAS:

7:00am - wake & activity
8:00am - eat (she's never hungry enough to eat when she wakes up)
9:20am - sleep
10:50am - wake (this was a great nap; surprised us)
11:30am - eat & activity
1:30pm - sleep
2:00pm - wake
3:00pm - eat & activity
4:20pm - catnap
4:45pm - wake
5:30pm - tried for another catnap as she was showing all her sleepy cues, but she was too OT)
7:00pm - eat
7:30pm - in her crib for bedtime and asleep before 8pm
Her bedtime routine is the same every night - change into PJs, bottle in rocking chair with lullaby music on, then swaddled and I rub her head a little while. We don't do bath right before bed because she's gets really excited in her bathtub and has a hard time winding down afterwards. We do her bath earlier in the evening.
If she does what she's been doing lately, she'll cry tonight around 12:00am, again at 2:00am then eat at 3:00am, cry again at 5:00am, again at 6:00am and awake at 7:00am (all these times give or take 30 minutes). Each time she goes back to sleep almost instantly with the paci.
I'll post tomorrow's EAS too as I've already forgotten how Sunday went! Mommy brain :-)

Thanks!

[AlanaCYK]

Hi! Here is how last night and today went...

My DH did the first half of the night shift. He had to go in and settle DD 6 times between 10pm and 12am then he brought her into bed with him. I took over at 3am when I fed her and she stayed in bed with me the rest of the night. She slept until 8:45am with a few instances of resettling throughout the early morning.
8:45am - wake
9:15am - eat & activity
11:00am - sleep
11:45 am - wake
12:30pm - eat & activity
2:00pm - sleep
4:45pm - wake
This was a long nap and I assume she was very tired. She screamed in her sleep a handful of times during this nap, but never woke up. I resettled her each time because she did not seem ready to wake up.
5:00pm - eat & activity (bath)
7:20pm - bedtime bottle, lullaby music, swaddled, head rub
Asleep before 8:00pm

She is a very restless sleeper overall. She thrashes around a lot...she is only 14 pounds yet she thrashed so hard she knocked something off her wall from the crib hitting the wall. She lifts her legs in the air (swaddled) then pounds them down on the mattress a bunch of times in a row. She only does this in her crib...when she sleeps in our bed she's relatively calm.
Let's see how tonight goes!

[jessmum46]

Looks like you're headed towards some more A time and the 3-2 - great fun!! All about the 3-2 transition- 5/6 months

It looks like you may need to push her morning A time to 2h30 after a reasonable night as that 45 min nap today could well have been UT.  We were fully on two naps with 3h A time before 6 months so there can be some rapid increases in what they can handle at this age.  Well done on the long pm nap though

I would suggest thinking about earlier BT, particularly on days where naps don't go so well.  Yesterday was a good example - I definitely wouldn't have tried for a fourth nap and would have had her in bed asleep for the night by 7pm rather than 8pm.  Early BT is a really useful tool during transitions - the trick is to get LO to bed before they are overtired and that can make all the difference to the night. 

Do you want to do anything about the paci prop?  Or are you going to ride it out until she can replug herself?

[AlanaCYK]

I think you're right about the 3-2 transition. The last two days she has had only two naps and an earlier BT. With resettling the naps have been good, but the nights have been tough. We've had to go in and resettle her at least 15 times the last two nights. With nights being tough the morning A time is hard to stretch. She's so tired by the 2 hour mark.

I would love to work through the paci prop, but I'm not sure how that would go while simultaneously weaning the swaddle?  She's able to roll over now so the swaddling is a safety risk and I started with that over a week ago. We haven't got past the one arm free for naps stage and we are still fully swaddling at night - how do you know when she's ready to try the other arm out?

I don't know if I'm resettling unnecessarily. She makes sing song whining and gurgling noises and when I go in her eyes are half closed. I give her back the paci to settle her for fear that she'll wake herself up completely. Should I be letting her whine herself back to sleep and only go in if she cries?

I would really like to learn how teach her to self-soothe. Resettling her 15-20 times every night seems excessive and I'm becoming a zombie! lol

[jessmum46]

I'm probably more of a 'rip the plaster off' kind of person when it comes to props.  You can wean the swaddle, but with the paci it's either there or not.  Personally I would be tempted to get rid of the swaddle and paci altogether cold turkey, put up with a few wonky days of sleep while she figures out a different way of settling but then be done with it.  If you're going to have to go cold turkey with the paci anyway, you might as well deal with everything altogether! 

I wouldn't intervene with settling her unless she is fully crying for you.  If you are intervening too soon (which it sounds like you may be if she is just gurgling and not fully awake) then that's when props become a real issue.  You may find if you just hold back a bit more then she will surprise you and be able to drift off again alone.  If not, you can use shh pat/PUPD. 

Just one other thought though - with so many wakings is there any possibility of discomfort e.g. Teething?

[AlanaCYK]

Oh boy this is going to be rough. I tried no paci cold turkey tonight. The first time she started crying tonight around 10pm I tried shh/pat to get her back to sleep and she escalated into screaming. I tried PU/PD and everytime she stopped crying and I reached over the crib railing to put her down, she started screaming again. After 3 hours of crying and screaming in my arms with shh/pat she tired herself out and fell asleep out of exhaustion. I'm guessing this gets easier each day?

I honestly haven't a clue why she's waking so often, but it could be teething I suppose. If it were teething though, wouldn't she be in discomfort and fussy throughout the day too? I can try giving her Tylenol tomorrow night to see if that makes any difference.

It's now past 1am and she's been asleep for just over 20 minutes...I guess I'll try and get a bit of sleep before she wakes up again. I think coffee will be my best friend tomorrow! :-)

[jessmum46]

Often with teething pain there is enough to distract LOs during the day so they aren't too bothered by it when awake.  The other thing that seems quite common (from reading here) is that it seems to affect either naps or nights, not necessarily both.  Until the big 2y teeth arrived here nights were relatively unaffected but naps would always go haywire!

I hope the rest of your night went ok.  PUPD can be rough going (there is a specific PUPD board for support if you want it) but you should see some good improvements in 3-4 days if you are consistent with it.

[AlanaCYK]

Hi!
The rest of the night went better. After her 3 hour screaming session, she slept until 5:00am! I was able to resettle her fairly quickly with shhh/pat and pu/pd and she was back to sleep before 5:20am. She slept until 7:30am and woke up very happy. Here's how today went:

7:30am - awake & feed
10:00am asleep for 1st nap (2.5 hrs was the most she'd go as she was quite tired)
10:45am - awake (45 mins nap normally indicates UT but she was SOOO tired when I put her down - not sure what I should have done there)
11:00am - feed
1:00pm - asleep for 2nd nap
1:30pm - started fussing crying; resettled with shh/pat
1:45pm - started fussing crying; resettled with shh/pat
2:00pm - a loud plane flew low over our house (we live next to an air force base); she cried out and started scratching her forehead - she went back to sleep with me just putting my hand on her back and fingers
2:10pm - whining/crying; shh/pat resettled
3:00pm - whining/crying; shh/pat resettled
3:30pm - awake and feed
(she started yawning at 4:50pm)
5:30pm - bath
6:00pm - feed
6:30pm - BT; she started crying as soon as she was put down in the crib - I did shh/pat, pu/pd and some white noise for about an hour and she eventually fell asleep around 7:30pm

Am I resettling with shh/pat too often? I'm thrilled that she went though a whole day of naps and night sleep without the paci, but I'm scared I'm trading one prop for another? I'm scared to let her go too long with the whining and fussing because she escalates so quickly into crying and then won't resettle at all. I've been reading lots of posts in the pu/pd board and can definately see others are struggling too. I'm going to stay the course and not give up - I know it's for the best in the long run.

I must celebrate small victories!
3 days of no catnap - on the way to 3-2 transition!
2 days with no swaddling!
1 day with no pacifier!

Thanks for your support and guidance! I'll let you know how things go over the next few days - wish me luck!
Cheers

[jessmum46]

You're doing great!  Keep it up . Try to fight the urge to rush in if she's just fussing, but if you feel you need to intervene just keep it to the minimum necessary for her to calm down x

[AlanaCYK]

Hi jessmum!
Thanks for the encouragement! Gosh this is tough, but I know there has to be light at the end right? :-)

How do I adjust EASY the next day when nights are bad? For example, the night before last was bad and she was exhausted before 2 hours of being awake in the morning. Her first nap was long but early which pushed everything for the day ahead and she only had a 30 minute 2nd nap - I didn't know whether to do a catnap in the evening or an early BT. I opted for an early BT since we've gone 4 days without a catnap, but that made her BT an hour and a half earlier than usual (5:30pm) and she was asleep by 6:00pm. She had another rough night last night (worse one since night #1 of ST) and she was wide awake and fit to be tied at 6:00am. I caved and brought her to my bed and was able to shh/pat her back to sleep off and on until 7:00am, but she only made it to 9:00am for her 1st nap this morning.

I'm scared that a pattern is emerging and it's throwing off her ST and EASY. Do I keep up the early BTs?
Thanks! x

[jessmum46]

After a bad night LOs often need slightly shorter A time, maybe 15 mins or so, but I'd try not to go too short or you risk getting caught in a UT/OT loop again.  My rule in the transition was that if the second nap finished before 3pm I'd try for a catnap.  If it finished at 3pm or later I'd do BT at 6pm/3h A time. 

[AlanaCYK]

Makes sense. What do I do though if my LO can't go 3 hrs A time yet (especially after only a 30 min 2nd nap). Today for example she napped only 35 mins and was awake by 3:25pm. She was already fussy by 4:30pm. She made it to 5:15pm, but there's no way she would have made it any longer so I opted for a CN. It took awhile to get her to sleep because she was tired, but I'm hoping a short CN will break the super early BT habit and get her back on track.

[jessmum46]

If she'll still take a catnap that's a good idea . My LO got to the stage though where she would often refuse a CN so for us it was easier to just accept she'd be OT at BT after 3h A time, but not have to fight for a nap.

How is it all going?