A few questions, 12 days old

[Renatapogacnik]

Hello, sorry to interrupt conversation... I also have a son 12 days old and i have a question... I Have to wake him up for every feed during day naps, but when i wake him up and give him E he is still sleeping, and when i want to put him back to nap he doesn't want to settle, he is kicking and moving in a swaddle. It is true that milk is poring into his mouth and he is a little bit more windy, but should i count the time we BF and he is half sleeping into A or into S time, i always need at least 30 min to get him to sleep and i rock him in my hands. I know i have to change rocking into something else. Do you think he might not br so sleepy as he sleeps during his E time. But he eats enough, he is gaining weight ok. Dont know when to start sleep training and how to burp effectively... Any suggestions? Does this milk production normalizes or it will be forever like that. Did you start sleep training with shhh pat? How long did it took you?
Tnx for any ideas... Love r

[lauradj]

Hello and welcome to BW!  12 days is still very very young and we typically encourage parents to wait until their LO is 3 months old before beginning sleep training in earnest.  There is so much going on for your new baby and this point that they need a chance to settle a bit into their new world.  In regards to your question, do your best to keep your LO awake during the feeding/activity time.  It can be quiet a challenge because they're so sleepy but it will help you ensure he's getting enough calories and also help him learn to distinguish between day and night.
One thing you can do is ensure he is unswaddled when you feed him.  If that isn't enough, you can feed him in just a onesie or even just a diaper if you're in a warmer climate.  Also, keep in mind that Activity time is from eyes open to eyes shut and at this young that may only include a feed and a diaper change, that's ok.
For burping, there are several different methods and you have to find the one that works best for you.  I placed my DS a little above my shoulder and gave him firm, steady pats or used a firm upward sweeping motion along his back with my hand.  Some moms prefer to sit their baby on their knee and rest the baby's chin in the V between their thumb and index finger so the head is supported and then pat or sweep.  Try them out and see what works best for your and your baby.   

Cheers,
Laura

[Renatapogacnik]

So until he is 3months i can do whatever to get him to sleep? Now i hold him vertically and shhh-path it is ok, but after few min he starts kicking with his legs and arms and sometimes gets out of a swaddle, than i have to swaddle again, burp again and start all over again. So after 45 min he is so fuzzy that i just swaddle give him paci and shhh path and he gets to sleep. And sometimes i miss the window as i have another DD and everything is so confusing these days. Today he WU from his nap and i BF him, burp and than he felt a sleep on our king size bed, there was no nappy change, no swaddle and the room wasn't dark. His A time as 30 min. Do you think that i always overstimulate him, because he is always so fuzzy that he needs paci. Today he just slept in without paci. I am so confused...Than sometimes he WU from his nap screaming, i think it's the air trapped in his stomach, but he burp like 2-3 times after each feed, mybe he eats too much, but i can't put him off the breast just when i thknk it's enough, right? I wake him up when 3h are around even though he is sleeping only 1h(because he napped later as i was trying to settle him down), i give him to eat, burp, change diaper and than birp burp burp until it is time for nap again. Is this ok? Because i have to wake him up for every meal during the day....
Also one question I can't do second cluster feed at 8pm an dream feed at 11pm because he is sleeping so tight that won't take breast. So if I clusterfeed at 6pm he wakes around midnight which is good, but at midnight he doesn't eat so much and goes back to sleep very quickly, and is up again at 3am...
 So how did you put your LO to nap or bettime in these rarly days?
Tnx for all the help!

[lauradj]

Tracy's motto was always "Start as you mean to go on", however it is completely understandable if you need to help your baby off to sleep for a nap or two, at this young age, by using a sling or some rocking.  If you're already using Shh-Pat and it's working for you, keep up the good work!  Especially with another child in the house, it can be challenging setting the routine down but it will be worth it long term. 
Is there a particular reason you need to burp your baby again after reswaddling him?  That might be stimulating him a bit and leading to a longer wind down.  I wouldn't worry if your baby is able to nod off in a bright room, that's actually a great sign that he's a good little sleeper.  A dark room is always nice for a really restful sleep but it's not always realistic. 
You definitely don't have to do the DF.  Some babies take to it, some don't.  Cluster feeding at 6pm and letting him wake when he's hungry is completely fine!  .  It sounds like you're doing a great job.  I've attached a few links below just to give you a little more information but try not to get too wrapped up in having his routine perfect just yet. 

Sleep Training  - the early days

How can I sleep-train a second baby when I have a toddler running around?

Average A times- BOOKMARK ME!!

Cheers,
Laura

[Renatapogacnik]

Thank you!
Yes i think i will go with EASY more slowly as he sometimes goes on 3h routine, sometimes doesn't. I have just one question when I swaddle him he becomes fuzzy, moving like he wants to escape out of swaddle. I can't seat with him 5 min to calm him down(4s) and also when he is swaddled it is hard to put him vertically so his face would be near my neck as Tracy said, it is quite impossible necause he has his arms in front of him swaddled. Do you think that rocking and paci won't do so much harm if I wait until let say 5 or 6 weeks? I am from today on eliminating all diary products out of my meals, my firs DD was also sensitive on diary so i was on diet from her 3rd to 9th month.

Thank you! You are such a support, it makes everything much easier!

[lauradj]

I am happy to help!  It's always a little overwhelming in the first couple of months 
Regarding using a pacifier and rocking, I don't think that will be a huge deal for the time being.  Tracy does recommend you get rid of props by 3 months, after which time they can start to get more set in their ways, so up until then, you're probably ok. 
You might find your LO prefers to have his arms swaddled at his side, which is the method we're shown here in Canada.  It also makes it harder for them to wiggle their arms out.  I ended up using a Halo Sleep Sack because my DS would also wiggle out of his muslin swaddle and it would bunch up around his neck!    Very scary!  Good luck and keep asking any questions you may have!   

[Renatapogacnik]

Ok, we are getting somewhere;) today DS is 3 weeks and as we have another DD of 2 y I don't have time to put him to sleep with shh pat, so i just calm him down and put him in his crib, give him paci and he sleeps, but sometimes i have to go in as he is crying and take him, so he burps and put him right back. But I don't know how will i teach him to sleep without paci when he is 3 months, i will have to take time, right? I just have a question sometimes he wu after 1h of napping and he is screaming. If i try to burp it is not going, if i gave paci eventually he falls back to sleep. But sometimes he just sleeps for 2,5h, how do i know if he is hungry? And if he wu earlier than whole easy for the day goes wrong.
Another question: i bf him around 6.45 pm, than bath and at 7.30pm he is sleeping and he wu around 1 am. I can't cluster f or dream f, because he is so asleep. Than next bf is around 4 am and at 7 am. Do you think i should try on to cluster and dream feed? I don't know if I will be effective...
Tnx!