Desperate- mummy about to go into hospital and 1 year old refusing bedtime

[josie30]

Hi,
I really hope someone can help! We have always been an EASY family (DD1 and DD2) and have put shhh pat and PU/PD into place successfully when both were young.
To cut a long story short I was diagnosed withb Cancer in April and was away for 13 weeks, amazing DH became single daddy. Next week I go in for bone marrow transplant and suddenly DD2 (aged 1 yr 1month) has started really playing up at bedtime. She always used to have bath, milk, story and go down beautifully but now she rolls about screaming, stands up in cot shouting etc. I've even tried reverting to shh/pat but it's nearly impossible as she's writhing about and trying to get up.

She has molars coming through and obviously family life has been very disrupted but I just can't figure out what could be causing this and what to suggest to hubby to do. Awful confession but we've reverted to the pram for 2 nights as its got so late!
I'm just so worried if he can't get her down my poor 4 yr old is going to be totally neglected and not get her proper bedtime routine

Ahhhhh

[Haribo2012]

Huge hugs honey sounds like it's very tough for you right now. I'd personally not worry about the pram at the moment if that's what it takes to make life a little easier then fix it later if that's what u want to do.

What's her day look like? Teeth do cause awful problems and can up the separation anxiety too, with all that's been going on it could just be a mixture of both.

She is a little old for shush pat and it can stimulate rather than calm, have you tried gradual withdrawal or walk in walk out? xx

[Mama2boys]

I have no advice but wanted to drop off big hugs and wish you well for the marrow transplant.

[babybarr]

I wanted to offer hugs too. I guess it's not surprising She's unsettled.

Is she still on two naps? She may need less day sleep? I know my boys only played up at bedtime when ut.

[josie30]

Her day is 7bottle, snack 10.30 ish. Lunch at 12 then sleep (1.5-2hrs) afternoon snack then dinner at 5. We then bath at 6 and try for bottle and bed at 7. This alters slightly when grandparents have her, I find she's much better after a nursery day as they have such a good routine.

[becj86]

It could just be that she's picking up on the emotion in the household. DS was a nightmare between my surgery and my pathology results. There's not much you can do about that apart from acknowledging that its hard to get to sleep sometimes. IIWM, I'd just APOP through knowing she is an independent sleeper and can return to that when things are more settled.

Best wishes for your transplant!

[Haribo2012]

I think her dat looks good really, I'd say just stick with it for now and concentrate on yourself. Her sleep will come good, she's just a little uneasy with things.

Good luck and let us know your ok x

[shresmummy]

Hugs Hun, I'm sure your little one will settle down soon. In the meantime all the best for your transplant. Big hugs and best wishes xx