Author Topic: 4 month old - trying to start a routine  (Read 1583 times)

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Offline haleytreat

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4 month old - trying to start a routine
« on: October 20, 2015, 15:55:12 pm »
I have a 4 month old (18 weeks) girl that I am looking to start a routine, as she has never been on one. I have tried to just follow her lead but that isn't working! I never know when she is hungry or tired! Here is a little back ground:

I am a first time stay at home mom. She is formula fed. Things were going ok until about 2 weeks ago. She slept ok but not great. I have always rocked or bounced her until she started closing her eyes and then I put her in her crib. Sometimes she would go right down and other times i would have to keep repeating. She is pretty attached to her paci. During the day is worse. Once she is out she does pretty good at night. But she wakes up at 4 and i either rock her back to sleepy or bring her in bed with me and then she will fall asleep without the paci or being rocked. And this week she is going down really well without being rocked every time. So i know she can do it at times. I realized i really don't let her cry. i really do intervene very quickly. Most days she will only nap for 30 minutes and i swear she is ready for another nap in 30 minutes. Or if i can get to her in time to give her the paci she will fall back asleep. So here are my questions:

1. Do i get rid of the paci since its more of a prop, especially during the day? I worry that if i don't then she will get confused when i do the pu/pd method at 4 am to get her to go back to sleep. Or should i work on the routine first and stopping the rocking before getting rid of the paci?
2. I have only read the first chapter in the book so far but it talked about how this isn't a schedule and to not watch the clock, but then the next chapter it says if your baby wakes up early to put them back to bed to stay on the 4 hour routine. So i am confused.
3. What happens when you have an appointment when she is suppose to go to sleep? For example i have a bible class i like to attend but it starts when she would take her nap. How do i tweak it?

I think that is all for now :)
Thank you


Offline creations

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Re: 4 month old - trying to start a routine
« Reply #1 on: October 20, 2015, 17:12:32 pm »
Hi Haleytreat, welcome to BW forums :)

It sounds like your LO hit the 4 months regression, which is why things became more difficult for you about 2 weeks ago. This is really common at this age, even for those on a routine.
I always found with my DS I knew when he was hungry, tired or something else because of our routine, I could rely on it to help me with the detective work. People say mums recognise baby's cries but honestly I didn't, I needed the routine, but I also know it appeared to the outside world that I knew just what he needed when he needed it :)

I can't answer your first question fully I'm afraid. I personally don't suggest dropping the paci cold turkey as the SIDS guidance recommend not to drop cold turkey until after 6 months old.  A paci doesn't go with PUPD method though if you chose this. There are other sleep training methods though if you decide to keep the paci.  You would probably need to be prepared to re-plug that paci for a while yet but eventually LO can learn to re-plug herself.

Routine versus schedule.  To get into a suitable routine Tracy recommended watching the clock more, this helps to establish the routine however even during this time it is not 100% strict on timings and there can be variability based on LOs needs and signals.  Once a routine is in place the clock isn't watched to the minute, for instance if feeds are at 11am and 3pm but you go swimming at 12.30pm baby is likely to be super hungry right after swimming. This would be a time where you wouldn't make her wait until 3pm for her milk but instead feed her right after swimming, even at 1pm, the calories used up for that swim would make her super hungry (and probably super tired so naps would likely change that day too), where as the general idea would be that if a baby is eating at 11 and again at 1pm, only 2 hrs apart (and doing this every day) she might be snacking or there might be a feed to sleep prop rather than hunger at that time.  My DS fed every 3hrs and was unable to move to the 4hr EASY as most LOs do. Tracy did mention some LOs don't manage to move to 4hr E until more like 6 months, this was exactly so for my DS (he was small so probably had a very small tummy, he also had silent reflux and couldn't take a bigger feed). I hope these examples help to show how the EASY routine allows for LO's needs and puts structure in the day without being rigid.

Getting out to things you care about dearly is good for your health. IMO it's worth working LOs routine around the class or changing the routine on that day to enable you to go.  I would first off look at establishing an age appropriate routine and then look at your class times to see how it might work.

hope this helps


Offline haleytreat

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Re: 4 month old - trying to start a routine
« Reply #2 on: October 20, 2015, 18:08:53 pm »
Thank you!

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Re: 4 month old - trying to start a routine
« Reply #3 on: October 21, 2015, 20:58:59 pm »
You're very welcome :)