Teaching my 2mo to nurse

[grace annes mommy]

J had a rough start (heart surgery and feeding issues afterwards) so we are only now getting to the point where she is ready to try breast feeding.  She is 10 weeks.  I'm working with a lactation consultant and am motivated, but progress is slow and it's hard work.

Anyone btdt and want to share your story with me?

Or just want to hold my hand and root us on?

[becj86]

So glad she's doing so well! Happy to hold your hand and cheer you on xx

Not sure I can be of much help, though Does she root for a feed?

[koe2moe]

Here to support.  What seems to be the problem?  Rooting?  Sucking? 

[ENMS]

Here to hold your hand

[grace annes mommy]

Thanks, ladies!  I need the moral support!

Mostly, she just cries at my breast.     Before surgery, I only had 2 chances to try to get her to latch and they were both unsuccessful.  She was intubated for the surgery which created an oral aversion plus vocal cord parysis which affected/affects her swallow.  6 weeks ago, she was getting most of her feeds from a NG (feeding) tube and now she's taking it all by bottle, so we've come a long way.  We've gotten her over her aversion and she happily takes a paci or bottle.  And her vocal cords have done a lot of healing, but still are not 100%.  However, she's moved away from the preemie nipples now, so she is coping with regular flow much better.  We are using Avent Natural bottles and I am compressing her cheeks to help her learn the suck needed at the breast.  And I'm using a nipple shield since she's used to the silicone.  We've had random successes.  A handful of times, she's latched on and nursed for a couple sucks to a few minutes.  Last Friday was our biggest success - she took half her feed by breast and even dozed while she nursed.  Since then, she pretty much hasn't latched on...    I think mostly she struggles with the flow.  It's either too much or too slow.  I also struggle to find good opportunities to get her to latch - she's either too hungry or not hungry or too tired, etc.

[michaeljacknnugg]

Cheering you on, you have come such a long way!!

Can you do a lot (like an awful lot) of skin to skin with her? Just hang out and let her decide on whether she wants to try or not?

Also, we're trying biological nurturing and finding it really relaxing compared to the more traditional holds. Might be worth a try?

[cath~]

cheering you on here too   you guys are doing amazingly well

no btdt advice but this would be my suggestion too:

Can you do a lot (like an awful lot) of skin to skin with her? Just hang out and let her decide on whether she wants to try or not?

if she's struggling with fast flow at times, you could perhaps try some of the suggestions here:
Oversupply and Overactive (Forceful) Let-Down

[koe2moe]

Since then, she pretty much hasn't latched on...   

What do you mean by that?  She couldn't stay on? 

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

No btdt but here for the moral support!

[grace annes mommy]

Since then, she pretty much hasn't latched on...   

What do you mean by that?  She couldn't stay on? 

She cries every time she's near my breast...  I did lots of skin to skin and offering the breast at our last feeding just a bit ago, but she just gets really mad.  Just wants her bottle.  I wonder if I should take a couple days off and start fresh?  She's obviously averse to the breast right now for some reason...

I just looked up biological nurturing.  Very interesting.
And thanks for the forceful letdown link.  Will have a look.

Some of the challenge with skin to skin is she's not very comfy on her tummy.  There might still be some soreness on her chest but also she just doesn't love tummy time.  So I find it challenging to get us both relaxed and comfortable.  She also doesn't love being cradled in my arms.

[koe2moe]

She cries every time she's near my breast...  I did lots of skin to skin and offering the breast at our last feeding just a bit ago, but she just gets really mad. 

If she did latch successfully the other day, it sounds like there is something else.  Have you tried letting her find the nipple?  Perhaps lay her on your chest and let her find it when you are laying down?  Or try both lying on the bed and you on your side?

Just my 2 cents, I am no expert at it.  Lots of vibes xx

[grace annes mommy]

yes, I've tried just letting her hang out near my breast hoping she might just nuzzle into my nipple and latch, but she either shows no interest or gets annoyed.  It gets frustrating bc she does latch on when offered every once in a while so I know she can but I can't figure out why she won't do it again.  There's something she doesn't like and usually even if she latches, she'll pull off after a few minutes and cry.  That's why the other day was so successful bc she was calm and even dozed off.  But since then, no go.  I don't get it.

[koe2moe]

Have you just recently changed soap, skin care products, scent or eaten something she doesn't like? 

[ENMS]

Have you tried to offer when she is very sleepy? It may help to get her used to it, while she is relaxed?

My son refused the breast for about a week after having his tongue tie clipped. Not exactly the same situation as you, but I was able to get him back on the breast by offering when he was calm, like just after a bottle feed, or when he was dozing off. It took many days, and I think the key is not to be stressed about it as she will feel your stress.

I also second skin to skin and biological nurturing. Even if she doesn't like to be on her tummy, I would try to cradle her even if you're sitting on a chair, it's still skin to skin and it may help her feel more relaxed and then you can try to move her and see if she will latch?

[ENMS]

Also it may be helpful to pace the bottle so that she she gets a flow similar to BF when you bottle feed?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UH4T70OSzGs&app=desktop