4.5 month old is a disaster

[Alexian28]

1. He can roll back to tummy but not tummy to back, and being on his tummy is very stimulating so we have to keep him from rolling in his sleep via super swaddle hack.
2. He can't be unswaddled because sucking on his fingers is stimulating rather than soothing.
3. He has hardly any good nap schedule at daycare.
4. He's always been a low sleep needs child.
5. He slept 12 hours beginning at 2.5 months but now wakes multiple times a night (thanks 4 month sleep regression!)
6. He has a paci habit: goes right back to sleep at night with it.
7. DD is 3 and constantly wakes him on the weekends due to the shifting sleep patterns
8. He goes to sleep around 630 and will wake 1-2 times before df, then 2-5 times before he's up early at 5:30.
9. Morning is a mess because he wakes so early that he's ready for nap at 7am, while I can't get him to daycare before 7:45.
10. I can't give him more food in the day even though he drains his bottles because he spits up constantly.

So, how do I help him sleep while simultaneously weaning from the swaddle and breaking the paci habit? How can he self soothe if it's stimulating? We tried no swaddle, complete disaster. My daughter has special needs and thus didn't go through a true 4 month sleep regression.

Typical day on the weekend is:
1, 3, 4, 5 am paci plug.
Up at 6, bottle.
8-9 nap usually woken by screeching toddler
9:30 bottle
10:30-1 nap
1pm bottle
3-4 nap
4pm bottle
(Used to catnap here, dropped @ 3 months).
6pm topoff, asleep at 6:30.
9, 10 paci replug
1030 DF

All bottles are 5oz.

[FPT23]

Hiiii!!

So sorry for all the troubles your having! Hopefully it gets better!!! It's tough! Seriously, and your doing great I'm sure with everything else on your plate <3

IRT your questions about helping sleep... Removing swaddle and paci. Honestly, swaddle takes time and you also may want to wean one thing at a time. I would perhaps start with the swaddle! 1 arm out for a few days, or even legs to start as you say his arms stimulate him! It's very possible he may not be ready to wean but I know once they start rolling, it's best to start as soon as possible to wean as it could be a safety hazard. So why not give that a go?

The paci; they have a bad rep! but can be a useful tool! The paci may require a bit more work but maybe you can work on other ways of soothing in the meantime, aside the paci? Maybe a head rub or patting? again, one thing at a time might be easiest.

Removing props takes awhile and patience. I guess accepting that can help too ...and don't worry, one day he will sleep and all this will be a blur. I try to tell myself that with my current 11 week old! Even I have questions

Try weaning the swaddle during naps for now? For a few days/weeks. See how it works? it may seem as tho his fingers overstimulate and perhaps they do as he's so into them (what are these!? ) ..but it may become his method of self soothing in the upcoming months too he's exploring!

It's harder with other siblings around- my 4 year old disturbs our wind down at times and wakes too ...have you considered white noise to drown out the noise? Might help! xoxo