3yr old waking crying/screaming at night

[amanda55]

Hello,

My just turned 3 DD has been waking in the night crying/screaming for last couple of months, we have had a lot of big things happen, dropped nap early February, Husband rushed into hospital for 2.5 weeks with bacterial meningitis mid march, started pre-school 2 days a week end of april, I started back to work last week and we've started potty training!.
  It is not every night but last night was not good, woke 10:30pm sobbing, sat up, I went in and she had laid down sideways and wouldn't let me lay her back on pillow and cover her but wouldn't let me leave room, kept crying saying 'stay, don't leave me'.  Husband went in and she really lost it, took ages to calm and wouldn't go back in bed, I got her into bed and she slept till 3am where woke crying again then again at 5and trying to get out of cot bed really upset, ended up she slept on her floor till 7:30 when her light came on. 

She has always self settled to sleep with her rabbit lovie, she now has a nightlight in her room.  Not sure if the shadows are scaring her or the fact that she now watches more tv.  Never  used to but I have a 1 year old and with her not napping now it is a quite time when he is napping to give me a break.

ON a good day routine:

7ish up
8 Breakfast
10:30 fruit
12ish lunch
2ish snack
4:30/5 tea, drink of milk after,
Bath, stories, song and in bed
7ish left in room, after 'change my water' 'another cuddle' 'make it lighter' etc.!

Is it just everything that's been happening and it'll sort itself out, how best to deal with these wakings?

[Martini~]

I am just thinking loudly that maybe she is tad OT? She just started nursery 2x a week and usually when kiddos start school or preschool they are definitely a bit more stimulated and tired. Have you ever tried an earlier BT for her to see if that helps? She dropped her nap not a long time ago.

[becj86]

How verbal is she? Can you chat with her about how she feels? DS' grandfather died 2 months ago and he's still dreaming about it and struggling to be alone, struggling to close his eyes or be out of my/DH's presence lest we disappear too, so yk, she could still be processing what happened with your DH. To add pre-school and nap dropping to that mix, it would be even more understandable for there to be sleep disturbances.

In your shoes, I'd be cuddling and reassuring where possible given she's had so many changes and scares lately. I would say this will pass.   

Something else to consider is whether she's waking feeling like she needs to wee - can happen when you start toilet training

[Katet]

Do you think there is any pain associated with it? could she have ear problems - I know with DS1 he never had problems during the day & it was only when he couldn't hear that we worked out he had heaps of fluid that built up pressure when he lay down, so we felt in hindsight it kind of accounted for him waking at night upset.

[amanda55]

Thanks for help and support

I suppose yes when you think about it she has been through a lot but I think it all started with her molars and I think it has been going on a while and only really worsened beginning of march with swollen bleeding gums as was up a lot every night and has maybe also learnt that we will go in so if she gets a bit upset escalates to shouting for me.  We did a couple of weeks ago just DH going in every night as then only woke that once and after a week she did 4 nights when heard nothing then he was away one night and I went in and started in earnest again. 

She is very anxious about pre-school, and every morning asks if going and if a yes, is upset all morning before goes (shes fine when there!).

She has more quiet time now as back a work I have less time to play so TV does go on when 1yr old has naps and we tend to go out in between to park, friends etc.

She is in bed left for 7pm and her light comes on at 7:30 in morn.  Sometimes light wakes her, sometimes sleeps through it and sometimes is up shouting/sobbing bout 6:15 (don't go in at that time as opening door would let light in from landing so would know its light outside!)

She does seem to urinate a lot at night as nappy very wet in morn, she does like a large glass of milk before bed which I know I need to cut down, it is around 5:15-30pm though so not reliant on it for sleep, I suppose I give her that much to fill her up as mealtimes are a farce at mo, lasts 5mins at table!