Author Topic: Alert baby crys to sleep night/day in arms/sling/crib etc very hard to soothe  (Read 867 times)

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Offline EllieS

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My Lo is 3 months today, he was 3 weeks early. He presents with some silent reflux, not on any treatment for it but this has had significant impact on how we've been managing him. We have been holding him upright after all feeds, which means his A has been limited to chats with us.  We change his nappy before his feeds (EBF) to reduce the need to lie down following feeds. He is also hard to wind, too vigorously and we agrevate the reflux, not enough and he gets trapped wind. This has all improved in the last couple of weeks, not gone away though. He seems to be some combination of touchy and spirtited with a dash of grumpy.  He is very alert and interested in what is going on around him.  We had been using a dark room, low arousal interaction and shh tap as well as pupd and a swaddle to put to sleep, each added to manage his sleep as he got more alert. We are now finding that he crys inconsolably when we begin any sleep routine, night time or nap. Even if we are holding him, or he is in his sling during the day we are not generally even attempting to put him in crib. Just walking into the dark room or making the room dark, or putting on the swaddle, or getting on our lap can trigger it. Initially this seemed to be related to pain, back arching, and some of his reflux symptoms, but in th last couple of weeks it generally doe not seem to be that. Rocking walking, etc does not seem to help him.  During the day in the sling, he can be so tired but cry and not fall alseep, same in arms etc.  When he does get to sleep at night he has generally slept well and has one 5hr sleep. Naps only last if we happen to be driving or if he is being held and changes cause him to wake up other wise he might sleep for 40 mins to 2 hours, or sometimes he would appear to go longer on one of us if we let him, but then he can sleep past his hunger point. We use a soother and he can at times, grunt and rub his face into our body in a way that appears frustrated. Sometimes he will settle to sleep with his face in the crock of my husbands elbow, lying across his body. At night he will fall asleep on my breast and I can put him into the cot.  We've been watching for his sleepy signs and at one time I could see them and had him heading for sleep but now even if we do notice them and start the routine he crys. At the moment self soothing seems a step too far, any soothing at all would be good, any advice greatly appreciated.

Offline becj86

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Hugs xx You sound exhausted :(

How long is he awake before you try getting him to sleep? He could be associating bedtime with pain, but also perhaps he's just not tired enough or he's overtired.

Do you think the reflux is a factor? It sounds like it is, TBH - have you considered medications to help him? He can't justify the pain, he doesn't know it will stop, he can only say "this hurts mum!".

My spirited went through a stage where he just didn't want to leave the lounge where things were 'happening' but if I swaddled him and sang to him while he lay on the floor, he'd nap quite happily - it was the transition he struggled with and eventually I learned that if he could bring an item with him, he'd go more happily.

Offline EllieS

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Sorry for delay in reply, I had no access to Internet for a couple of days. How long he is awake varies, but between 1 1/4 to 1 3/4 hours. I try to watch for tired signs. The reflux is really reduced, and with our keeping him upright and other modifications that manages what is left well. Mess not been recommended by doc. We definitely end up overtired. But even when I catch the first tired sign he seems to nearly have to cry to relax. He does not have a sleep item yet but is swaddled. Will try adding an item associated with sleep. Thanks.