PU/PD for 9 month old - am I on the right track?

[sueyloo]

When do I leave her?

Hi
I posted on the EASY board about my (now) 9 month old who had stopped self soothing suddenly.

I'm trying to put her on a 3-4hr EASY schedule but she's really resisting naps and there's some NW as well. She's been using me as a prop so I'm trying to break the cycle. I've done a day of (a loosely 3hr) EASY using PU/PD at nap and BT but just needed some reassurance I'm doing the right thing.
What I've been doing is when she cries, I put my hand on her back and use key words - it's BT now. It's time to go to sleep. It's ok. Mommy's right here. I only pick her up if she's been crying for a long time or is very very upset. But I really try to avoid picking her up because when I do put her back down she is so upset that it reverts any progress I had made prior to the pick up.
My questions are
When do I leave her? Am I supposed to stay in the room with her until she falls asleep? Yesterday I left her fussing a little with two inanimate objects (plastic tops of ointment) which she played with until she went off on her own. She slept for about 1.75 hours.

She fell asleep in her car seat and woke up as I took her out. I did a short WD routine and again gave her those pots but she didn't go down. I then did the hand on back blah di blah for 40 minutes. During this time she stopped and started but just didn't settle enough. Now After 40 minutes of no sleep where on the EASY schedule do I start?

I ended up bringing her out of her cot. Let her play a little (cuz I didn't want her thinking her crying was being rewarded with a snuggle with mommy and lots of sweet milk 🙄) I then breastfed her after about 20-30 minutes A. Then another 10 minute A before doing a short WD routine to try for another nap. This time it took her less than 10 minutes to finally go off. I left the room just as her cries had stopped and her eyes were getting heavy.

Am I on the right track? Should I be picking her up? (When I tried that in the past she spent more time in my arms than in her crib because she would cry for so long whenever I picked her up).

[Skadiver13]

Hi hun, I am on a train but didnt want to leave you unanswered. When I get to to a computer I'll hope back on.

[sueyloo]

Thanks skadiver.
Just about to bf her as she's up from her nap. She managed 2 solid hours! But she's definitely still very tired from all the NW.

[Skadiver13]

Hi Hun, if your lo is 9 months she should be on a 4hr easy at this point. Can you post a few days of your EASY routine? If you posted on the EASY board have they been helping you with your routine? If she's not on a proper routine no amount of Sleep training/ pu/pd is going to work.

[sueyloo]

I'm actually starting to think that my EASY isn't right. We're having more NW tonight than we did the previous nights.

Yesterday this was her EASY
WU & E 6:25
A 6:45 - 7:45
E 7:45
A 8 - 9:15
S 9:15 - 9:35 (she fell asleep in the car) but resisted her nap when I tried transferring her to her cot
A 10:15 - 10:45
E 10:45
A 11
S 11:45 - 1:45(she was showing signs of tiredness)
E 1:50
A 1:50 - 4:50 (tried putting her down but resisted)
A 4:50 -6:30
E & BT routine 6:30
S 7

It's really helpful to post this actually. Definitely not a good EASY at all ☹️
I'll go back to the EASY board for more help.

[Skadiver13]

Hi hun, we try and not post on two different boards about the same topic given that we could give contradicting advice if we don't all have the same information about what's going on. Since we've sort of sorted out the Pu/pd issue and realized it's probably more on an EASY issue I"m going to lock this topic. But i'll hop on over to the EASY board and post on your thread there and between me, creations, and others we'll try and help you the best we can. Just realize that we are not magic fixers as much as we wish we were. We'll try to give as much advise as we can but ultimately you are home with your lo and need to do what's best for you even if you may not know exactly what that is.  I think you are falling into the same trap I did when my son was your lo's age. I just tried and tried and tried to tweak his easy and get him to sleep and I was all and i mean ALL over these boards trying to figure it out (driving the mods nuts LOL) and in the end I just needed to let go of the control a bit and listen to my lo. I took a week and just let him be. We can only provide the avenues to sleep but we can't make them sleep. We do the best we can but only they can decide if they are going to sleep. The more you try and dissect what the issue is the more you'll drive yourself nuts iykwim.