Some advice for 9 week old please

[Vally]

hi. My LO is 9 weeks. We are working towards a 630-630 routine to fit in with school run for DS1 and DD1. Bedtime going pretty well most evenings and his day works a bit like this:
E  630/7am
A 630/7 to 8am
S 8-9ish when on school run.

E  1030/11am
A  sometimes quite short due to short morning nap on school run do sometimes goes to sleep after this feed
S  varies often have to then wake about 2pm to feed before school run

E 2pm
A 2 to 3ish
S 3 to sometimes 430

E 5pm
A to 630pm

E 630pm
S 630/7

He will usually wake at midnight and 3am feeds and then usually again at 530am but I don't feed him them and just bring him into bed using Paci and he may drift on and off until 630/7am

He usually drinks 3-4oz at each feed. Sometimes on his bedtime feed at 630pm he will only have 2/3 ounces as he fed at 5pm.

Questions
- should I try and stop the 5pm feed and make him wait until 630pm even though he's pretty hungry at 5pm and usually has 4oz?

- am I creating a problem using Paci as I wander if this is why he wakes at 530am or do you just think he's had enough sleep by then? Should I be trying to get him to sleep without Paci

- is there any further advice you can give on our current Easy for his age?

Thank you

[creations]

Hi Vally
Sorry you didn't get any replies yet, I'm not sure how we missed your post.

Your EASY is looking good

- should I try and stop the 5pm feed and make him wait until 630pm even though he's pretty hungry at 5pm and usually has 4oz?

I would keep it in there. It is 3hrs since the previous E and he is likely ready to eat. It's fine to have the BT E less than the 3 hrs, often we call it "tanking up" or "cluster feeding" when they come close together like that.  I always worked feeds at 3hrs through the day but always gave the BT feed at whatever time BT was regardless of it it had been 30 mins or an hour or 3hrs since the previous feed.  Sometimes they take it like a top up before the night sleep (so taking less than a full feed but it still fills them up, looks like yours is doing this) and sometimes they will still take a full feed even though they not long had one because they just know it's BT (mine did this, BT feed was always big even if less than 3hrs). So, no problems there.

- am I creating a problem using Paci as I wander if this is why he wakes at 530am or do you just think he's had enough sleep by then? Should I be trying to get him to sleep without Paci

It really depends what you call a problem.  Paci use has some benefits and many people want LO to take a paci, others don't. Yes it can be habit forming, but so can taking him into your bed at 5.30am.  It doesn't mean you can't do those things but be prepared further down the line that if you set habits now you might not like them later.  You can tackle habits if/when you decide you've had enough of him coming into your bed at 5.30am, if that's now then yes go ahead and resettle him in his cot.
Do you think he might be hungry at 5.30am?  It's just that he might be finding it hard to get through from the NF at 3am all the way up to 6.30/7am for the WU feed.  I would maybe try a quick NF and see if he just goes back off in his own bed, like you do for the other NFs.  I know he does a good long stretch from BT to 12midnight but LOs only really do one long stretch between E over night.

- is there any further advice you can give on our current Easy for his age?

It looks like things are working well for you You've managed to work naps around the school runs which is great and looks like there are some longish naps happening too
I think the only thing that catches my eye is that it is quite a long A time before BT at 2hr to 2hr 30min or longer if the nap ends up a bit short.  You might consider another CN in there at 6 for say 30 - 40 min and that takes BT a little later more like 7.30/8pm.  He might go for the CN and later BT and that *might* move his night feeds a little later and shift that 5.30am WU to more like 6.30am.  Or he might do what many do which is refuse an evening CN.
It's up to you really, you could give it a go for a few days and see what happens.
Personally I would try it to see because I know I hated the 5am/5.30am WU, but if there is a huge fight against taking an evening CN there isn't much point spending a long time and lots of effort and frustration trying to make him sleep then.

hope this helps you

[Vally]

Thank you so much.

Last night he had to have a later bedtime of 730pm as the other two had tennis so he napped until 6pm. So he went to bed at 730pm woke at 1230am and 330am for feeds. He then woke at 5am so took him to our bed with paci and he stayed asleep until 730am. I'm not sure why he woke at 5am, I think maybe just came out of sleep cycle as it was about 415am then he settled after 330am feed. My other problem is that I wait until he's fast asleep before putting him down, should I be putting him down awake? I know that I will be then spending half and hour putting paci back in which is why I sit with him in my arms after feeding until fast asleep. I mostly do this as I don't want to wake the other two in the night. Any advice on how to start awake to sleep as it's difficult to try and do in the day due to his napping on the go? Thank you

[creations]

Hmm..I would say 7.30pm to 5am is not really a long enough night but 5am is a really hard time to fall back asleep from, it's when many LOs wake.  Do you have total blackout in the room? Even a chink of light can be enough to make some of them think it's morning when they go through the transition so they fully wake instead of going back to sleep.
I suppose though, as he is napping in your bed he is getting more than the 7.30pm-5am so it's probably fine - see mine when he woke that was it, up for the day!  Too early!

My other problem is that I wait until he's fast asleep before putting him down, should I be putting him down awake?

I ought to say yes.  To follow Tracy's guidance would be to make sure you teach him to go down awake. However you are taking everyone's needs into consideration and really it isn't a problem until it's a problem.  Some LOs can go down asleep in the night and it doesn't effect their ability to self sooth for the rest of the night or for day sleep, so it might not become a problem.
You could just begin with the BT put down though.  I assume your other kids are not already sleeping.  Or switch his routine so that he goes to bed earlier before the others and gives you a clear set of time to teach him without worrying about crying and fussing waking the others?  I think that's what I'd do.  In the short term your other kids miss out on you for 30-60 mins while you put him down, in the long term your other kids gain because he will not need you to hold him all the way to sleep and you will be generally more available.

WRT napping on the go - you clearly need to have him nap on the go so I would continue what you are doing. Maybe look into possible solutions to any problems which arise (I hear there is black out for a pushchair for example).  When mine was a few months old I had a thread asking if I should re-sleep-train into the pushchair as my DS would not sleep in it, ever! It made some things really hard for me. In the end I didn't go down that route but I realised how babies form habits and mine was in the habit of sleeping independently in his own bed.  My advice is to keep in mind that babies form habits, habits can be changed but that's when you have to do something about it, so if at all possible start the habits you want and don't start the habits you don't want.