I actually think your routine isn't too bad hun! The only thing I would suggest is to keep that first A time at a minimum of 3hrs, as a good first A is what is going to help stop any EW problems
If he's great at going to sleep by himself for naps and BT, then it's like you said, the NW are likely a result of the quick jump in to feed, and not allowing him to SS during those wakings. It is still absolutely normal for him to need to feed at night, especially if he is a bit slow to start on solids (not to fear, it will come!), however 1-2 feeds would be considered "normal". What I would essentially do is, if he can make it 4hrs between feeds during the day, then he can do so at night. So during those NW, if he wakes before the 4hr mark from BT feed, then I would first give him a few minutes to try to settle himself, if he can do it in the day, he can do it in the night...it's just a matter of teaching him and allowing him the time to do it. If he's just chatting, fussing etc. then I would just leave him to it, if he's crying and it starts to escalate then I would maybe try some form of shh/pat or holding in the crib, maybe some gentle rocking with your hand. Does he take a paci at all? You just basically need to commit to settling him without feeding. Sometimes it can be better if DH does it, as he may associate you with milk. If he wakes at/around the 4hr mark, then it can be safe to assume it could be hunger, then feed and right back to sleep, and any other wakings from that point to the next 4hr mark, resettle with no feeds.
It won't be easy hun, there will likely be a lot of crying, but the fact he can settle himself during the day is a fantastic start. He is just used to you jumping in and feeding at night, and the only way to curb it is to commit to resettling. It won't happen over night, and the first few nights will be the worst...so I would maybe try over a weekend or something, so that you and DH can possibly take a nap the next day if the night is really rough. What do you think?
