EW for last few months with 10 month old - loosing the will!

[rla0402]

Hi there,

My DS is 10 months and has been waking between 5-5.30 for the last few months (since around 7 months). Occasionally he'll wake 6-6.30 which I'm happy with. I'm back at work in a few weeks so starting to panic about the exhaustion and going back to work. A friend of mine has a 4 year old boy who still wakes at this time!! 

I've tried EBT, late bedtimes etc but can't seem to crack it. Its rarely hunger and I leave him until he whinges and then keep resettling until 6am not that he ever does.

Here's a typical day:

WU - 5.30
Bottle around 6ish
Breakfast - around 7.15ish
9-9.30 - falls asleep on school run and transfer to cot for anywhere between 30 mins - 1.5hrs
10-10.30ish - snack
12ish - lunch
1.30 - nap (around 30 mins to 1 hour)
5ish - dinner
6.30-6.45 bottle and bed

A few days last week he refused his afternoon nap after having a long morning nap (1.5 hrs) and didn't sleep until I left to pick DD up from school so it was 30 mins tops.
If he does have a late afternoon nap because the morning one was long, I have to wake him up to do the school run.

I've read lots of other posts and was thinking along the lines of reducing the morning nap and brining the afternoon one forward so its longer? Any advice would be greatly appreciated as I don't think I can continue like this for much longer!

[candieshop22]

Hi. Your issue is simple. You are putting the baby to bed too early. If you move the bedtime to about 8:30pm they would sleep till about 7ish the next morning. This is going to take some time to introduce but give it a couple of weeks and you will see a change.

[rla0402]

Hi, thanks for your reply. Everything I've read says the opposite though because of overtiredness etc By the time it gets to 7pm he's shattered.  How would you recommend making the bedtime later? I'm guessing it's something which needs doing gradually?

[jessmum46]

Hi, sorry you're struggling with EWs.  They are horrible aren't they?!

We'll all have a different perspective on this I'm sure, and certainly a later bedtime (as in effectively shifting the whole day later as you would for DST) can be one way of getting the morning WU time later.  That said, I know that a 10.5h night (7-5.30, or 8.30-7) for my kids has usually been the result of over tiredness and they don't do well on a night sleep that short in terms of behaviour and mood.  They are all different though - as are families!  (Anything post-7.15pm here is ME time and there's no way my kids are staying up to 8.30pm!! - but we do get up for the day at 6.30am which would be hideous for a lot of people!!)

I've read lots of other posts and was thinking along the lines of reducing the morning nap and bringing the afternoon one forward so its longer?

This is a good idea I think.  It sounds like you are hitting the beginnings of the 2-1 now and so making sure that LO can't make up for a short night with a long early morning nap is pretty important.  I'd be tempted to make that morning nap 45 mins and wake him if not already up, and then bring your lunchtime nap earlier to try to get through the afternoon with him more rested.  On days he doesn't nap well you can give an early bedtime a try - it worked well for my DD (she would do 13-13.5h nights sometimes!) but not so for DS who tends to max out at around 11.5h. 

The alternative is keep the long morning nap but keep him up on the school run by whatever means possible and push his nap to at least 10am, not before.  You risk pm nap refusal doing it this way round (long am, short pm) but if he can be persuade to catnap in the car/pram it can work. 

It is very confusing because there are lots of reasons for EWs - all you can do is try something and stick to it consistently for at least a week and preferably two then reassess.  What do you think?

[rla0402]

That is so helpful, thank you very much!! Completely agree with anything past 7-7.30ish as me time otherwise I'd be up until the early hours trying to get sorted for the next day! As for wake up time, anything after 6am would be a bonus. Great - I'll crack on with the shorter am naps and see how it goes. Totally different baby to my DD who was 7-7!

[jessmum46]

Yup, they really are all different!