Desperate for help - 13mo old massive sleep issues

[Kitsune]

Hello all, I am desperately seeking some advice/guidance on the sudden sleep issues I am experiencing with my LG.

She is 13mo and always been a good sleeper and self settler. About two weeks ago she began fighting her bedtime and also waking 5-6 times in the night, often staying awake for an hour or two.

It has now commuted to naps. She will cry hysterically the second we leave the room and it can take up to 2hrs to settle her. I've been so desperate for sleep I began sleeping in her room on the floor which worked initially, but now she still cries and just generally shuffles around in her cot unsettled. She won't co-sleep and likes her own space.

My HV suggested CC but there's no real progress and it kills me hearing her cry. The thing is even when I sit by her cot she just seems to assume it's fun and games and seems to become renewed with energy.

She has a good bedtime routine of bath, bottle and story. Eats well during the day and gets lots of play.

I'm at my wits end and feel so anxious and afraid. Please help.

[maybell245]

I am not one of the experts on here at all, but my DD starting waking from naps and during the night around 14 months and as a result I dropped from 2 naps to 1 slowly.  It was tough for a week or so, but once she adjusted everything with naps and night sleep was fine.

Could she need less naps?

Are her molars coming in and she is in pain?  That happened around 13 months for my DD too.

[Lindsay27]

Could you post a typical routine hun, or what her routine used to be before this started happening?  It could be that some nap tweaking needs to happen, or as pp said my DD got all 4 of her 1yr molars at 12/13 months.

[Kitsune]

Thank you for the replies x

She's certainly on/off droopy and chewy but not to the extent she's been with previous eruptions, however I've given Calpol on evenings her cheeks have felt particularly warm and red.

Her typical routine was/is;
Wake 0630-0700am - bottle on waking (cm)
Breakfast 0845
1st Nap - 0915 until 1030
Lunch - 1200
2nd Nap - 1330-1400 until 1500-1530
Tea - 1630-1700
Bath - 1800
Pjs, stories, quiet cuddles and bed - 1830-1845

Sometimes she'll have another bottle after a story but it's not and miss. She would always be happy to be left in her cot til she dosed off but now she cries the second I goto leave. We moved house last week but this began a week before out of the blue. I just feel so anxious and worried that I can't fix it. Am also worried it's SA.

[Lindsay27]

No worries at all hun!! I definitely think that the naps have to be changed, I'll post back later after my LOs are in bed

[Buntybear]

Hello, I would think you are on the way to dropping the 2nd nap now and need to think about capping one of them. It can be either really. We opted for a short 2nd catnap here. I would start to push the 1st nap later to start with x

[Lindsay27]

Yes I agree with pp, there could definitely be some separation anxiety at play, but it could also be that she is UT for naps and needs to start the 2-1 transition.

So what you can do is push that first nap out and cap it, and then do a long PM nap, or push the first nap out and let her sleep as long as she needs, then do an afternoon cat nap.  Regardless her morning A time needs to be bumped up, most at this age can easily handle a 4hr A time.  I found with mine if I let them have the long morning nap then they would refuse to nap in the afternoon together, so I would cap the AM nap.

Something like:
WU 6:30
Nap 9:45-10:15
Nap 1:30-3:30
BT 7

Or

WU 6:30
Nap 10:30-12:30
Nap 3:45 for 20-30mins (many have to APOP this)
BT 7

[Kitsune]

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply and advise, it's so much appreciated x

I will give these new nap timings a try as I was also starting to wonder if we were approaching a transition.

In terms of the SA, is it just a time/phase issue? I've started to play a lot of object permanence games with her like peek a boo and hide and seek, she's now stopped wailing when I leave the room, it's purely when put down in her cot now x

[Lindsay27]

In terms of the SA, is it just a time/phase issue? I've started to play a lot of object permanence games with her like peek a boo and hide and seek, she's now stopped wailing when I leave the room, it's purely when put down in her cot now x

I think what you are doing is great, and I really think that once you start the 2-1 transition things with the SA might improve.  I often found that SA when being placed in the crib was often just a sign of being UT/protesting sleep because they aren't ready to sleep yet if that makes sense?

[Kitsune]

Thank you so much x
It's been 3 days of being consistent and first day of altered naps and she went down so much easier, hopefully this is all promising, will see how she gets on tonight. Again thank you so much for the tips and support xx

[Lindsay27]

Sounds fab!! Let us know how you get on!

[Kitsune]

Nope. Back to square one.

Woke at 2:10am and screamed until 4am. Checked everything and even offered her some cm; nothing.

I hate the one good day you have and the false hope it brings.

[Lindsay27]

As the saying goes, Rome wasn't built in a day   

I would try to stick with the new nap routine for a few days, she may just need time for her body to regulate and adapt to changes.  How were naps yesterday?

Also, I can't remember, but do you think she's getting any teeth?  I know my DD got all 4 molars right around this age.