Help! 10 week catnapping through the day

[babiiprycess]

Today hasn’t been a good day, naps are 25-45 mins all day...I’m exhausted from trying to resettle. He did great with his morning nap the last two days. There’s so much more work when it’s short naps!

[becj86]

There’s so much more work when it’s short naps!

Absolutely!
Sorry to read you've had a rough day. You will have plenty of days when things just don't go to plan, so try to roll with the punches and know that tomorrow is another day. You're heading for growth spurt territory, so definitely if he's demanding food 'early', feed him and try to stick with the EAS order of things - it really does help to have that predictability. Hugs xx

[babiiprycess]

There’s so much more work when it’s short naps!

Sorry to read you've had a rough day. You will have plenty of days when things just don't go to plan, so try to roll with the punches and know that tomorrow is another day. You're heading for growth spurt territory, so definitely if he's demanding food 'early', feed him and try to stick with the EAS order of things - it really does help to have that predictability. Hugs xx

Thanks! The last few days have been a lot better. It's good to know I have a place to turn too when things do go bad! I noticed he's now taking 1.5 hours nap in the morning (it could be more if I didn't wake him!) and I am thrilled!

I do have a question and I'm not sure if you are familiar with other books out there. Why do they emphasize a longer lunch nap and BW has long naps throughout the day? I actually tried another program which is very similar to that but for the life of me could not get my LO to sleep for 2.5 hours during lunch hours. With the BW program I am much happier now...especially letting LO let me know what he needs instead of forcing him to this specific schedule.

[becj86]

I noticed he's now taking 1.5 hours nap in the morning (it could be more if I didn't wake him!)

That's awesome You don't have to wake him bang on 1.5hr of sleep either, you can allow him to wake on his own or wake him ~2hr if you prefer.

My understanding is that other people who advocate strict schedules tend to be all about making the baby fit into your life and a long lunchtime nap fits within that paradigm. I think also perhaps they're looking forward towards toddlerhood when a child takes one long nap about lunchtime and they then advocate trimming the other naps through the day and keeping that long nap solid throughout babyhood.

I'm so glad things fit better for you now. BW does advocate a method that means you listen to your baby, provide him/her appropriate opportunities for eating, playing and sleeping. We don't suggest that baby should rule the roost, however, so you're still the parent. Your job is to be consistent and by doing that, your baby has the best chance of self-regulating and taking the food, sleep, etc. that he needs. I think one of the potential cons of BW is that the routine changes up reasonably regularly as A times increase (~15mins every fortnight or so from 3 months to 6 months) so planning things a long time in advance can be tricky but we tend also to just know we can wing it for a day here and there as long as we have a plan to get back on track.

[babiiprycess]

My understanding is that other people who advocate strict schedules tend to be all about making the baby fit into your life and a long lunchtime nap fits within that paradigm. I think also perhaps they're looking forward towards toddlerhood when a child takes one long nap about lunchtime and they then advocate trimming the other naps through the day and keeping that long nap solid throughout babyhood.

I'm so glad things fit better for you now. BW does advocate a method that means you listen to your baby, provide him/her appropriate opportunities for eating, playing and sleeping. We don't suggest that baby should rule the roost, however, so you're still the parent. Your job is to be consistent and by doing that, your baby has the best chance of self-regulating and taking the food, sleep, etc. that he needs. I think one of the potential cons of BW is that the routine changes up reasonably regularly as A times increase (~15mins every fortnight or so from 3 months to 6 months) so planning things a long time in advance can be tricky but we tend also to just know we can wing it for a day here and there as long as we have a plan to get back on track.

Ahh that makes sense! Thanks for all your help and encouragement.

As for the awake times, this is something i should gradually extend or will my baby let me know he would like to be awake longer since he won't be showing sleepy cues. Right now he's pretty much at 1hr and 20 mins and he'll be 12 weeks this Friday.

[becj86]

I find those people who extend A times gradually by 10-15mins each fortnight tend not to be the people who post about things going awry. People who wait for the signs often miss them - they are:
- baby sleeps shorter naps (they often gradually get shorter from 1:30 to 1:25 to 1:20, etc.)
- baby wakes frequently or for a long time, generally happy, in the early hours of the morning (3, 4, 5am)
- baby takes longer to fall asleep for naps

Babies can get really in the habit of sleeping at 1:30 A time if they do it for 1.5-2months then they seem OT if you increase their A time by even 5-10mins and really they are capable of staying up and will sleep better if they do but people get very scared of this type of short-term OT without knowing about the chronic OT they're setting up with lots of shorter UT naps.

Long story short, just increase gradually every couple of weeks and if he sleeps a 30min OT nap, be there to resettle and know he'll grow into that A time pretty soon or go back to what was working again for another few days.

[babiiprycess]

Ok the past few days, naps have gone to pot again. I’ve noticed he’ll wake 10-15 mins into a nap. He did so well last week giving us 1.5-2 hrs and it was really easy putting him down. LO just turned 12 weeks and is in leap 3, does this affect his naps? Now it takes him awhile to settle and go to sleep but he is clearly tired. He also did really well with putting himself back to sleep and now when he wakes he gets frustrated and starts crying. Just when I thought I had it down...

[becj86]

LO just turned 12 weeks and is in leap 3, does this affect his naps?

Yes, leaps do affect naps.

It sounds like he's waking from the jolts that happen as he goes from light sleep to deeper sleep. Have you read about hold through the jolts? That can help and you'd just hold his arms and/or legs in that time when he's jolting so he can stay asleep. Swaddling can help too if he's not already rolling, so long as he doesn't escape the swaddle - then it doesn't help.

Sorry to say this, parenting is not a job when you'll ever "have it down", in fact, you'll usually feel like that just before something changes. Children are constantly developing and new challenges come along all the time. What you've done is absolutely great though, you've had success with getting a routine that works for him and you've noticed the change and sourced information about how to help him with his new challenge. This too shall pass xx

[babiiprycess]

Yes I did read holding through the jolts but I haven’t done it in awhile and he seemed to do fine without me holding the jolts. I’m just wondering what the change could be? I’m still swaddling him, he’s in a love to dream swaddle right now since he still has the startle reflex, and he hasn’t rolled over yet.

Thanks! I do realized they are constantly growing and going through leaps. I sometimes tend to be hard on myself.

[babiiprycess]

We’ve had 30 min naps these past few days and I don’t know what I’m doing wrong! He has dark room, white noise, swaddle and he sleeps in his bassinet. I tried the wake to sleep method yesterday with success yesterday morning but that was it. LO is wide awake at 30 mins. I tried to increase his awake time to 1hr 30 mins with no success. Yesterday we even had a shorter nap at 25 mins. I usually leave him for 10-15 mins when he wakes since he doesn’t cry (usually whimpers) and giving him a chance to fall back asleep but he doesn’t. He’s napped for 1.5 - 2 he’s before so I know he can sleep longer. Should I increase his awake time even more? I feel like he’s constantly overtired. He does well at night so I don’t understand. 

[becj86]

His A time should probably be about 1.5hr now, so I'd keep it there consistently for 3-4 days. Is he hungry when he wakes? This is an age for a growth spurt and it can play havoc with naps.

Try the extra A time and see how that goes - you may need to go in a bit earlier to help him back off to sleep if he's not getting there himself. His sleep cycles become more pronounced around this age too, so he may just be needing a bit of assistance to help him learn again. How did you go with hold through the jolts?

[babiiprycess]

I’m still keeping his awake time at 1hr 30 min. He’s usually fed an hour before he goes down so I don’t believe he’s hungry. I usually feed every 2.5 hr and he seems content. He still wakes up even when I hold the jolts and starts looking around. I’m continuing the wake to sleep method to see if that might work.

[becj86]

Here's hoping this phase passes soon and you find something that works

He may need a touch more A time - you could try an extra 5 mins if you want to and see if that helps.

[babiiprycess]

Question - when resettling does that count as awake time?

[becj86]

Question - when resettling does that count as awake time?

I tend to just count the whole lot as nap time. If you've not gotten LO up from bed and have just resettled, I'd count that as sleep.