21 week old waking up every 2 hours at night

[Gretaa]

Hello, been having this problem for a while now. She knows how to self settle during first two naps and at bedtime but not during the 3rd-4th nap and in the middle of the night. I tried feeding her everytime she wakes up but that doesnt change anything so im back at feeding her every 3-4hrs at night. She falls asleep in her crib which is near my bed. I usually let her cry at the first waking for 10mins or so to ser if she falls back asleep and she sometimes does when she doesnt i bring her to my bed and we cosleep for the test pf the night because then when she wakes up i can put my hand pn her legs and she settles back to sleep. Now... what is happening? Is this separation anxiety, still in wonder weeks? She still wakes up a lot in my bed its just much easier to settle her because putting my hand on her legs does nothing when she is in her crib. We had really bad sleep for about 3 weeks now, she never slept through the night but she used to wake up only once or twice sleeping for 3-6 hours.

[newkidontheblock]

Hi there and welcome Could you share your routine in EASY format? If she settles independently, then it could just be a routine adjustment is needed. Xx

[Gretaa]

Thank you.
7-7:30 - wake up
9-9:15 - 1st nap
10:30-11 - wake up
12-12:30 - 2nd nap
13:30-14 - wake up
15:15 - 15:30 - 3rd nap, shorter 30mins up to an hour
16-16:30 wake up
From this time she refuses to sleep but has always done this
If she sleeps or our routine shifts and she wakes up at 17:00 or so then i dont even try to put her to sleep.
Im following her cues more then the clock but for now she is awake for 1,5-2hrs, usually 1,5 and sleeps for 1,5-2hrs for first 2 naps, then 30-1h for the 3rd nap.
19:00 bedtime routine start
19:30-40 in crib
20:00 falls asleep

Im having a lot of trouble from 16 till 19 to get her to catnap, she cries in her crib and she cries in my arms and if i get her to sleep she usually falls asleep at 18:30 which is too close to bedtime in my opinion. But as i said, we always had this problem and she would sleep alright. Even if she falls asleep at 18:30 she still keeps waking up every 1,5-2 hra at night

[newkidontheblock]

Hey. Sorry for the late response. Waking up soon after before can indicate overtiredness, which seems to be a case here. Since baby is 4 months old, you would be slowly moving to a 4 hour EASY at this point. As you stretch out those A times, your last nap should end closer to 4-4.30. You could then go for an early bed time of 6.30 to avoid overtiredness. As your routine settles and baby is able to handle a slightly longer gap to bed, you can slowly push to 7. What do you think?

[Gretaa]

I dont know, i cant figure her out anymore. Her night waking have improved a little bit but her naps are suffering right now. They are different every day. For example she slept 2hrs yesterday for her 1st nap and today her 1st nap was only one hour long even tho her awake times were  the same. And its always like this. Even if her A times are the same her naps are from 30mins to 2:20h long. Not to mention her A times can go from 1:30h to 2:15, i never know when to put her down now cause if its too early she will start crying after 10mins or so, if its too late she has a really hard time falling asleep at all. For exaple i put her for her 2nd nap after 1:40 A time and she couldnt settle even with my help for almost 2hrs. Im really lost.

[newkidontheblock]

Have you taken the BW Know your baby quiz? This was super helpful to me. https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=52283.0

My daughter was spirited and honestly, even 5 minutes here and there made SUCH a big difference. Figuring out your LOs personality type would definitely help in understanding her. Figuring out A times can take a bit of trial and error. It's not only the amount of time but also how did she spend that time, you know?

[Gretaa]

Well according to that test she is angel and textbook baby. Which isnt far from the truth. We only have problems with sleep.

I had to take away her swaddle because she started rolling over before sleep. Went cold turkey, took her 3 days to fall asleep without crying, which is great. We even had a night where she slept for 7 and 5h but naps are now max. 50mins. First two days without the swaddle she cried a lot before falling asleep (not alone, i would stay with her with my hand on her belly and would move away from her bed when she was calm) but would sleep for 1.5-2.5h and today is 5th day without the swaddle and her naps are just gtting shorter and i dont know how to extend them because she cries when she wakes up and the moment she sees me she thinks its time to wake up and is all happy. If i try to get her to sleep some more she just ends up crying for half an hour or more. If shes happy maybe thats all she needed, i dont know.