3-4 hour with Spirited/Touchy Type

[Onewoman]

Hi there, I'm wondering if anyone has any ideas/encouragement about moving to the 4hr routine with a spirited/touchy type of baby. The problem is she can do the eating at 4hrs but can't do the awake time.

It is difficult to keep her awake for 1 3/4 hrs (let alone 2) as she gets so grumpy. She is then overtired and is more likely to do the 45 minute wake up and it is a lot harder to settle her. I feel like I may be undoing some of the good work I have done regarding her going to sleep on her own. I would nearly always be able to put her down awake and she would drift off on her own, but with keeping her up longer I have to spend quite a bit of time shh/patting in the cot or doing pu/pd and I usually have to stay with my hand on her until she is dropping off.

Also, the cat nap in the late afternoon just doesn't seem enough for her as she is grumpy until bedtime and has been difficult to settle and can wake a few times after bedtime needing to be settled again as she is over tired. I am trying to keep her as calm as possible, but it would be nice to be able to play with her a bit more!

This has been going on for weeks now and I feel like we are in a bit of a rut. She has dark circles under her eyes and so have I!

[Deb_in_oz]

i can relate to everything you have said.

i did not move Olivia to 4 hr until she was 5 months old and even now at 6 months she tends to want to take her best nap at the "catnap" time so often when she has done 2 x 45 min naps she will make up for it at that time (usually doing a 1 hr 30  nap).

at 5 months when i started 4 hr she was staying up between 1hr 40 - 1hr 50 (with an occasional 2 hr stint) i don't think you need to get fixated on 2hs up and 2 hrs down.  i woudl put her down for first nap around 1hr 45 and by the time she fell asleep 10-15 min later and then slept 1hr 30 (or rested if she did not stay asleep the whole time) i then got her up and she played for 15-30 min before next feed and so on...Sometimes you feed at 3hr 40 and others at 4hr... it all works out in the end.  I always did 3 1/2 hrs from 3rd to 4th(bedtime) feeds.

[BiancaB]

Hello,
My ds was a very touchy baby and he was just not ready for a four hour routine until he was around 6 months..my dd now 5 months (angel) is handling a 4hr routine well..
So if I was you I would just try working at a time space your dd can handle..maybe increasing to a 3 and a half hr where you can ..
Flexibility is the key, sleep is a big deal for these types so if your routine is impacting her sleep you may want to shorten your feed times again and try to go to a 4hr in a few more weeks.
Bianca

[Onewoman]

Thanks ladies, I will add a bit more but have to go out now. The reason I am moving to 4hr is that she is not interested in eating at 3hrs and is waking up at night after sleeping well.

[Onewoman]

Well I made it back to the board! Yes I think you are both right  I think I will go slower with her than Tracey recommends and just extend her awake time by 10 minutes for a few weeks and see if she can cope with that better. Also, I will do a longer wind down. I'll aim for 3.5 - 4 hr feeds, but at the mo it is mostly 3.5 which is fine. It's just getting the naps in which is hard as at the moment as she is doing 1 x 1.5 hr nap in the morning then 3 x 45 mins. And yes, just like your lo, Deb, she wants to have a good nap at 4pm ish. I will just go with this for now.

Thanks for your advice   I do get hung up sometimes on doing it by the book!

[jillybeansmith]

Hi...don't rush it...if lo needs a nap, it's better to let a spirited have a nap then get bent out of shape and over-tired...My lo is 9 months old, and on the 4 hr easy, but sometimes needs an extra nap...especially if we are in a busy enviroment...I would rather let him nap then let him get overloaded.

With spirited babies, they actually need their naps during the day in order to prevent overload and have them awake all night...

Try to stick with the 4 hr easy, but use the lo as a guide, sometimes they need an extra nap...