does the first book advocate cio??

[micah'smom]

hi everyone,

i just need clarification. i lent out my first book (secrets of the BW) and i remember a chart where tracy explains different kinds of cries. one is the overtired cry and she explains what it sounds like...then i remember it saying, "if left alone, the baby will fall asleep."

what does she mean? ds is getting mobile and so his wind-down is really long, making him overtired. do i let him cry?

[Johno & Aurelias Mum]

Nope

No the first book certainly doesn't advocate CIO in anyway.

What the crying chart I think is describing is the whingy crying that some babies do to themselves as they start falling asleep.  Its not crying to get attention, its a kind of moaning really.

I think every baby is different, my DS has always just repeated the same sound to himself over and over again, some babies whimper.

HTH

[Maddy's Mum]

Hi there,

Jenny is right - the cry that the first book talks about is the mantra cry, which babies do when they are calming themselves down and its kind of a form of self soothing - it is not at all a desperate cry for help, just a rhymical cry.

HTH!
Dee
x

[micah'smom]

thanks!

[CaedensMama]

How can you tell when it is a cry for something versus the mantra cry? My son often cries as he goes to sleep - even when I am holding him, I cannot figure out what he needs - he is fed and changed and it is time to sleep - so best I can figure he needs to sleep...... but he often cries for 10 -20 even 30 minutes. After 30 minutes he will usually take the breast again for awhile, seems to be thirsty after all that crying.
It almost seems like a "mad" cry, not hurting, but not a whimper either - it's a full blown cry, often close to a scream.
Would you say this is a mantra cry or something else?
Thanks

[micah'smom]

jennifer,

caeden is adorable!

when micah was as young as your lo i couldn't tell either. but now he's 4.5mo and i can clearly tell the difference.

mantra cry sounds like it's coming from the throat, and it sounds like baby is complaining or moaning, not "real" crying. it also usually does not involve tears. it's called mantra b.c usually it sounds like the same sound over and over. "real" crying sounds like it's coming from the chest, screaming, and with tears. trust your instinct - if it sounds like baby needs you, he probably does.

how long are you keeping him awake? he might be overtired and therefore can't fall asleep easily. definitely try closing curtains/blinds, going into a dark room, swaddling. etc. or he might be going through a growth spurt.

hope that helps.
selena

[CaedensMama]

Thanks for the info Selena - very helpful.

I have been keeping Caeden awake about an hour - often though by the time he is done crying and fussing it is pushing two hours up. Honestly I have tried putting hi down anywhere from 45 minutes to 2 hours after his last nap and it really doesn't seem to make a difference in how much he cries or how quickly he falls asleep. I have been aiming for right about an hour maybe just a tad more as that seems to be the norm for this age.
It seems that he goes down best right after he wakes up in the morning, almost no A time, just a diaper change and visit with daddy and then I nurse him and he usually goes back to sleep fdor about 45 minutes. By then end of the say he is usually closer to 2 hours since his last sleep when I put him down for the evening.
He is going thru a growth spurt and I have been trying to stick to a wind down routine so hopefully we will see some improvement soon!

Thanks again!