Author Topic: I feel so dumb asking this question...  (Read 1172 times)

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Offline mom711baby

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I feel so dumb asking this question...
« on: November 07, 2005, 15:30:39 pm »
but how long should I wait before I go into my daughter's room at night?  When she wakes at night, she fusses, she doesn't really cry.  Well, to be honest, I haven't waited long enough to see if she cries.  I think I already know the answer to my question, but, does "fussy" crying qualify as "she's crying, I gotta get in there" crying?  I just feel like the longer she's awake at night, the longer it will take for her to go back to sleep.  I have tried waiting to see if she goes back to sleep or if she really starts crying, but I don't want her to wake herself up too much.  So I always give in and go in there and give her a paci.  Most of the time she goes right back to sleep.  Should I just let her fuss for a while?  Where does the line cross from fussiness to real crying?  I don't want to let her cry, so that's why I am not sure if letting her do some "fussy" crying classifies as letting her cry.  Could someone help me out here?  I know this sounds so stupid, I hate to waste your time.  I am sorry this is so confusing...let me know if I need to clarify some things.  Thanks so much.  Can you tell I'm a first time mom?

Emily
mom to Madeline
7-11-05
textbook with some touchy thrown in

Offline Isom'smom

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I feel so dumb asking this question...
« Reply #1 on: November 08, 2005, 00:47:03 am »
I know exactly how you feel!  I, too, could not stand to have the LO cry alone.  One night DH and I were having a pushing match in bed to see who would get up first, and then suddenly all was quiet.  I went in and he had put himself back to sleep.  Took about five minutes (we were both super tired).  That's about the only way you can tell - waiting.  You will know when the fussy cry becomes, "MOM I NEED YOU NOW" cry.  It's not a subtle change, it's a definite escalation.  And a few days after listening to the change, you'll be able to gauge at what point you need to intervene b/4 LO gets frantic, but past the fussy "mantra cry".  Just takes a little will power (or being so tired you just lay in bed praying for LO to settle :oops:  :D )  HTH

Crystal

Offline mom711baby

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I feel so dumb asking this question...
« Reply #2 on: November 10, 2005, 14:00:50 pm »
Thanks for the advice girls.  It's so nice to have a place where you can ask dumb questions...besides bugging my own mother all the time! :)

My lo can put her self to sleep sometimes.  Sometimes i hear her "talk" herself to sleep, but if she's fussing, it seems like she can never do it.  Her fusses just kind of escalate.  Hopefully she will learn someday.  I just can't keep going in and giving her a paci; that won't help her learn...am i right? 

Thanks again for the replies and encouragement.  :)

Emily
mom to Madeline
7-11-05
textbook/touchy

Offline Isom'smom

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I feel so dumb asking this question...
« Reply #3 on: November 10, 2005, 14:15:30 pm »
Oh, I wouldn't fuss with the paci so much.  She just needs to know that if she can't handle it by herself, you'll be there to give her a hug and help get resettled.  It's a learning curve for both of you.  She is still figuring out the whole tired=sleep thing too. :wink: