What to do when pat/shush wont work

[koshaughnessy]

I have a 3 month old and recently adopted the EASY routine, although I was somewhat using this before without knowing it.  This is her daytime routine.
E 7AM
A 7:15-9
S (45 min)
E 10
A 10:15-11:30
S (45 min)
E 1
A 1:15-3:00
S (45 min)
E 4
A 4:15-?
S (45 min) then bedtime routine: bath, massage, quite lullaby
E 7 feed

Dream feed 10

Over the last week her EASY has turned into EASA, as she gets tired more quickly ( I have learned her ques of rubbing her eyes and yawning) and only sleeps 45 minutes.  I try the pat/shh to try and get her to continue into the next cycle, but she gets frustrated and ends up crying and fighting very hard to get out of her wrap, so we give up and do activity time again. 

Also, at night she is now waking up at 11ish and then every hour after that.  I go in each time and pat/shhh but she just moves her head from side to side making grunting noises and lifting her feet off the bed.  She seems to be in a semi sleep phase because her eyes are close.  Last night I did pat/shh for 2 hours with the continued side to side head motions and grunting.  I finally went to the glider and paci and she was out in 5 minutes, I rocked her another 5 minutes and put her down in the crib...but she was crying 5 minutes later.  This repeated until I finally gave into a feed a 4AM, but she didnt go to sleep after that either...pat/shh for 2 more hours and finally I rocked her for an hour and she slept without the grunting.  I hate to do the rocking as I know this is a prop, but it's the only thing that works after hours of pat/shhh not working.

Any ideas, I'm exhausted.  Nothing else has changed except for the decreased activity time during the day needing early sleep and therefore a repeat of activity time.   Is this the problem???

Thanks
Kiley's mom, Kristina

[Lucysmom]

Hi Kristina -

Sounds like you are having a hard time of it.... :cry: HUGS to you.

The first thing that occurred to me was that Kiley's first activity time is rather long for a 3 month old I think.  I remember with Lucy I kept her activity times at about 1.5 hours or less when she was 3 months old.  Especially that first activity time many babies prefer it to be shorter as the first nap is somewhat of an extension of their night sleep.  It sounds like she is overtired, thus not able to settle into sleep and perhaps the pat/shush is too stimulating for her.  It does not work for every baby.  But maybe what I would do is try to shorten her activity times, esp. the first one and see if things improve.  Unfortunately, 3-6 months is a wonky time in terms of daytime sleep and being overtired can mess up night sleep.  If she will only take 45 minute naps no matter what, just make sure she gets in loads of 45 minutes naps (so your day would look like EASASE).  I hope this makes sense.  I am sure you will get great advice from others here.

Take care,

[FrasersMum]

Hi Kristina

I agree with everything Melissa said!!

Also, there is a post at the top of the Naps board about trying to extend Naps, and the mums on that board will be able to give you heaps of suggestions about helping your LO get past that 45 minute nap hurdle.

Good luck!
Jo