First of all, I think we've all caved in more often than not so don't be hard on yourself for bringing him into bed. I was the worst for a while with giving Nikolas the breast in order to fall asleep.
I think it's also fantastic that you were able to lengthen his day naps using wake to sleep.
As far as I can tell, your day schedule looks fine, pretty much ideal I think. It doesn't look like he's getting overtired at all. If he didn't have the late catnap I'd say he should be going to bed around 7 but otherwise I think it's all okay.
When you say that you put him to sleep at 8 but you don't get him to sleep until 9, is this because he cries? Or is he just in his crib? If this is the case, I would leave him in there if he's not upset.
As for the soother, does he fall asleep with it in his mouth or do you remove it when he is still sleepy? If he falls asleep with it in his mouth, when he partially wakes in the middle of the night, he may need it to be put back in as he's accustomed to falling asleep this way. IF this is the case, you may want to think about weaning him from it. I don't have too much advice about that because our lo started preferring his thumb at around 4 1/2 months so he started refusing the soother. I find it interesting that you say Liam only wants the soother for night sleep. Maybe he would then be okay without it because he's obviously capable of sleeping during the day without it. (Check out the Props board for more advice on this)
As for grandpa's sleep style, he's not there everyday so I wouldn't worry about it. My FIL whose absolutely wonderful does the same thing with our son whose 11 months!!! I used to cringe but the once a month he does this, I figure it won't hurt. However, if he or someone else will be watching Liam regularly, I would talk to them about how you want him to be put to bed.
That's all I can think of for now....I hope Jo or someone else can offer you something more. Let us know how things go!
