Very short A time for six month old

[CharlotteandCharlie]

I have been reading alot of threads these days and have attempted with NO luck to get my six month old dd on a 3 or 4 hour EASY.

I had read the BW when I was pregnant and thought I was armed and ready then all the other advice started coming at me.  The most influential advice I received from our Health Region and Health Care Providers was that when bfing you must feed on demand.  For a new mom, having surgery, screaming baby ... the easiest thing for me to do was to put her to my breast when all else failed. So here we are now at 6 months and after every nap no matter how short she must have my breast to continue on with the day.  I have tried to withhold it from her and it is at least an hour of crying.  She has cereal and veggies so I know she is not hungry after 2 hours.

So my concern is my dd seems to only be able to tolerate 1.20 - 1.40 mins of A time before she has a melt down.  Is she a rarity?  Am I doing something wrong?  Does her short A time have something to do with not being on a 3-4 hour EASY?  I thought I read somewhere that spirited babies have shorter A time.  Is this true?  She is very spirited.  I would love it if she had longer A time.  Naps are a nightmare and it would be nice if she didn't have 4 a day.

I guess we follow EASY but it is more like a two hour EASY.

Can anyone set me straight?

[Gage and Sophie's Mom]

Hi there! Gage and I have had struggles with short A time. He is just turning 5 mths, and we are PUSHING 1 hr 15min. It has taken us about 1 mth and half to go from 45 min to our current time. I am just now starting to push 15 more min. Along the way I have discovered that his short naps (45 min) were happening because he was staying up for only 45 min. So what I thought was being overtired was actually being UNDERtired.  I was so afraid of exhausting him, I wasn't allowing him to push himself.

Also, we had issues of not staying asleep at bedtime. I think this was also happening because he wasn't tired enough to sleep for the night. Since I have been pushing him, we have had MUCH better luck with bedtimes.

To get him to stay up longer, I have been feeding him toward the end of his A time and proviiding more active engaging activities until the last 10 min. I was also worried about overstimulating him during his extended A time, I think I was boring him to get sleepier.

Keep at it. It is just a matter of solving the puzzle. I know, it is easier said than done. I am right there with ya.

[CharlotteandCharlie]

Good Evening! Thank you for your post.  I don't feel so alone.  I too was wondering if I was understimulating her as well as her being undertired but she turns into a bear and rubs her eyes and nose alot.  She doesn't really yawn but at the one hour mark she begins to rub.  I have kept her up for 2 hours but she goes into meltdown and the walls vibrate from the screaming.  Poor girl.  I have noticed if we go 1.40 she will wake after 20 mins.  This is very frustrating but I guess she was overtired I don't know.  Eventually it will sort itself out but if I am doing something to cause it I would like to fix it.

Is Gage spirited?  My dd fusses most of the day and goes from happy to miserable very quickly.  I do love our play time.  I am really enjoying her personality as it develops.  It would be nice to not have to be one the edge all the time waiting for 1.20 hours to come or a meltdown, which ever comes first.

Thanks again Gage's mom.

[Gage and Sophie's Mom]

You know I am not really sure what personality style Gage is. Before I figured out his A time threshold, I thought he was GRUMPY all of the way! Now, I think he is mostly textbook (you would have thought this would have been easy to figure it out, but this my first time ), but is VERY active and little strong willed as a spirited baby. Gage also rubs his eyes and whines, and it is like clock work.... right at the hour mark. But hey I figure it used to be at 45 min, so we have made some progress.

What has worked for Gage and I is taking baby steps. Even just increasing A time by 5 min. is better than nothing. Some A times we never get to 1 hr 15, so I just try again the next A time. Or sometimes we only get to 1 hr 20 min. I just try my best to get some additional time in.

Also, I have noticed that if we are around others or in a new place he is so focused that the time flies by. However, if I push it too much he will have a meltdown when it is over. It can be sooo frustrating, but I certainly know how you feel about living by the clock. I have just come to terms with the fact that we will be kind of anchored to our home for the time being, but this will not last forever. I try to remember that I am doing what is best for Gage. If you ever want to vent, I'm here.

[katriona]

Ladies,

I also just wanted to write that I empathise. Gage's Mom, we've also been battling the 45 minutes naps, then only being able to stay up for 45 mins - 1 hour. Wow -- Theron could be undertired and that's why he's sleeping for such short periods? I hadn't thought of that. But again, I also have the eyerubs that you could set your watch by, even yawns first thing in the morning. I'm scared not to act on these cues, for fear of having overtiredness affecting the rest of his day (and night). Looks as if baby steps are the way to go. I was just able to reach 1 hour 20 mins (I think) now, and he went down for his nap without a fuss.

Last week I thought we'd had a breakthrough: he was staying up for 2.5 hour stretches between his last nap and bedtime. Unfortunately he also started waking up an hour earlier, and was inconsolable, then noticeably more fussy during the day. I managed to flip things back to his usual "schedule" by putting him to bed a little earlier than usual (he slept later than usual the next day!), so these longer stretches were obviously something he wasn't ready for.

I, too, have noticed that he's more happily able to stay awake when there's new things to look at, or we're out and about. Thankfully with spring coming, we'll be able to sit out under the trees in our new garden, and hopefully the fresh air and new things to look at will both extend his "A" time, and tucker him out when naptime comes around!

All this, and he's almost outgrowing his Amby!

Well, good luck to you both, ladies. Please keep me posted on your progress, just for my own sanity!

Mrs. B.

[katriona]

Hi again 

Gage's Mom -- I was just wondering if you'd mind sharing some of the activities that you try to keep Gage going with to stretch out his "A" time? I try for the more physically active things rather than things that will set his little brain on fire, i.e. dancing with Mom, rolling play, or jouncing on the balls of his feet. This in the hope that if he's physically tired, he might sleep longer. I've yet to see signs that its working, but I'm getting some great biceps!

Mrs. B.

[ks6]

We had short A time and short naps at that age, as well as a 2 - 2 1/2 hour EASY.  Couldn't stand the nightmare 4 naps a day anymore.  To get to a 3 hour EASY, we slowly extended to 2 hours of A time. (Still got the 45 min. naps--I had no energy to extend them.)  My ds also insisted that he breastfeed immediately, so I would carry him around the house for 15 min. until it was time to eat.  It was kind of like having set nap times and feeding times until things fell into place.  The morning nap even got longer on its own.  It took several weeks, though.

HTH,
Kim

[Gage and Sophie's Mom]

Hi katriona! I am proud to say that Gage and I are on a 4hr EASY! With plenty of blood, sweat, and tears we made it If you post your routine I can TRY to help. Here are a few tricks that work for us.

1. Just before the crabby mark (ie. 1hr) start the major entertainment until 15ish min after that mark. I do all of his favorite things, and I will list examples later. I was afraid of overstimulation so I was doing reallly low key activities, but that was making him sleepy. After that hump, Gage gets his second wind and the rest of the A time is much easier.

2. Get out of the house if you can, it is soooooo much easier. Time flies and your lo will be so entertained.

3. With Gage I found stretching his A time too slow impedes progress. I think I was extending it too slow, and Gage was getting stuck at the particular time. As a result, I started stretching the increments (your choice) every 3 to 4 days. However, if your lo just has to go to sleep (we all have those days) go with it. Before, Gage would really cry when overtired and this would go on for hours. Now, I just try to get him to sleep and if doesnt fall asleep in about 45 min, I get him up for a low key activity and try to get him drowsy again with various activites.

Here are some activities that we do throughout the day. Some are VERY silly, but work wonderfully. I dont mind making a you know what out of myself. Whatever makes him laugh. That is the best sound in the world! 


Low key activites:

looking out the window
walking around the house looking at pics or whatever
stroller ride indoors or out
laying side by side giving eskimo kisses and making silly faces
brusing his hair (he has a ton... 3 haircuts already )
Rub lotion on
propped up on mom's bed or other beds in the house
sitting in vibrating chair
read a story
have a bath
watching mom do dishes, cook, etc.,
sing lullabyes
Sometimes when he get crabby, I will lay him in his crib for quiet time. He looks at his mobile and plays with toys
put hands under running water
rub soft animals, blankets etc., on cheeks, feet, arms ect.,
compare hands and feet side by side or in the air
slow dance
look in the mirror
go outside and feel the grass and take a tour of the yard

High energy activites

johny jump up
walker
play in the exersaucer
Make silly sounds Gage loves high pitched squeals like fire truck or piggy sounds, or very loud fake laugh
Dance to ubeat music
peek a boo
practice crawling and sitting up
bouncing on my legs and kind of throwing up in the air
shaking his legs like he is vibrating
flying around like superman
singing songs that require hand gestures
making music with pots, spoons etc
giving raberries

Do whatever your lo likes and dont be afraid to be silly.
 

[katriona]

Hi Gage's Mom,

Thanks so much for those suggestions, and congratulations on reaching that four hour easy! That gives me hope that one day I'll look back and laugh.

I'll get back to you in a little while on our "schedule" and a couple more questions (if you don't mind). We wound up in the ER in the middle of the night, last night, with a respiratory infection that had come totally out of the blue. Theron was choking in his sleep and his breathing was terrifyingly laboured. Needless to say, what with the middle-of-the-night adventure, and all the fuss that the nurses made of him, his sleep was completely shot. He was back in his hammock blowing raspberries at 2am (through 3am) and wide awake at 6.30am too. Not that I care one whit. EASY is on the back burner for now!

I must say, nursing and rocking a 17.5lb baby to sleep under the bright ER lights made me incredibly glad that we were able to stop the nursing-to-sleep habit.  He's a heavy guy!

[taylorbean]

Hey. My lo is six months and that her is A time and she is on four hour easy. So, you lo is not alone on that one. 

[katriona]

Hi Gage's Mom,

Ok, back in the saddle again! Your post was really interesting, but I had a couple of questions on the way you went about things.

When you say that Gage gets a second wind and things are so much easier for the rest of his A time, how much A time were you keeping him up for after the crabby mark? Were you working in increments, or just deciding to shoot for a set period of time, like two hours?

And Theron's crabby mark is accompanied by yawns and eyerubs if I leave it to late. Should I risk overtiredness in the hopes that the adrenalin rush of keeping him up will extend his A time, and hopefully have a knock-on effect on his subsequent nap?

I really appreciate your input.

Mrs. B.

[Gage and Sophie's Mom]

It is nice to hear from you again. I hope your bub is doing well.

Gage got cranky after an hour (now, about 1.45 min). You can set a clock to him, that is how I knew it was out of boredem more than anything. When Gage does get tired he will rub his eyes or rub his face on my chest. I do act on these cues most of the time. Gage will yawn even after getting up from a nap so I dont always go by this alone.  I just extended Gage's A time in 10-15 min increments depending on the day. If we dhad a bad day and could only extend 5 min, the next day we climb right back on the horse again.

I would say you know your lo best. Does he get whiny everyday at around the same time? how is he when you go out? Gage doesnt get whiny until he is truly tired when we are out. Can you preoccupy him easily or is he set on going to bed? How long does it take him to fall asleep? How long are his naps? I usually go by these things. Gage's naps are slowly dwindling down right now which tells me he needs more A time. 

I think at this age you have to look at the clock and tired cues. If you post your routine I can see if I can elp you tweak it.

[*Natasha*]

Hi Gages Mum,

How are things going with you two? Sounds like you are doing great extending that awake time, have you managed to get a good routine going fitting in naps solids etc? Just when though we had things under comtrol DD has started waking at 6.30am She has been sleeping 7-7 since about 3 months so i think we need to tweak our routine again
Anyway my DD does the same thing when tired rubs her face in my shoulder chest when tired and very cuddly. Saying that we are going lots of that lately as she is teething very badly and wanting lots of attention.

[Gage and Sophie's Mom]

Hi Natasha! We had 2 ish great weeks. Although Gage is sleeping through the night he is waking earlier and earlier. From 7:15 to now 6am and his naps are getting shorter. It is always something.  I know how to make the naps longer.... more A time, but I have no idea how to get rid of the early rising. What are doing for it?