Sleep problems - getting desperate - please help

[Lucysmom]

Yes, the 4 hour EASY is basically this:

7 am Eat
9 am Sleep
11 am Eat
1 pm Sleep
3 pm Eat
5~6ish catnap to get through bedtime routine
7 pm final bottle and bed

So the two naps of the day are ideally 1.5-2 hours each plus a catnap.  Are you doing wake to sleep for his naps?  Like I said previously, if you cannot get him to sleep more than 45 minutes, then just make sure he has as many 45 minute naps as he needs.  So he might do two 45 minute naps between feeds.  And remember the catnap is a freebie so you can give yourself a well deserved break and just use whatever prop you'd like to get him to take a catnap (i.e. pram, car ride, being held to sleep, etc.).

Do you have the second book, The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems?  I only had the first book for a bit and really got a lot more out of the second book.

Also, I think you should post on the props boards and ask others' opinions about whether or not your ds is dummy dependent.  I know you say that the dummy can fall out while he is asleep and he does not wake up.  But then it seems possible that he does need the dummy back to get back to sleep once he comes into light sleep.  Just a thought but I really think posting on the props board would be a good idea.  I don't have experience with dummies as Lucy never took one.

It is about 7 pm there so I hope he is settling down nicely for bed.  Just one more night for you and then your dh will give you a well-deserved break. 

[Katet]

lucysmom has given you great advice, I have been following the thread, but felt there was not much I couuld add.

 I do strongly agree at least part of it is the dummy that is the problem, the reason I think this is your little fellow reminds me of my ds#1 & he would sleep pretty well the first few hours & then wake heaps the rest of the night & would settle with the dummy (until about 5am, when he wanted a feed)
The reasons - 45min naps, & the constant waking.

The fact he doesn't wake when it falls out says it just falls out when he is in a deep cycle, but when he gets to a light sleep phase he needs it to go back to sleep.

Sorry I have to be the confirmer of bad news, but I do think that is the main cause of the problem, combined with what sounds like a spirited bub, which from my own experience means (unfortunately) every little milestone etc is going to be hard work & his sleeping through the night will probably be pretty erratic over the next 2 years if my experience is anything to go by.

I would gather together some strength & ditch the dummy if it was me... I left it till much later with ds#1 & boy has it been hard...not there yet & he is 31 months

[shazzy]

morning,

I will post ont he prop board.  Last night he was ok up until midnight ( had to go in once) overnight I left him twice and he feel asleep, once he went matt and I partly swaddled him and he eventualy fell asleep and once I was able to get him to sleep without the dummy - he kept spitting it out.  You are probably right it might be a dummy issue - I guess I am too scared to tackle that one in my current state!

In the morning he can only go 3 hrs before food as he takes so little at the 7am feed. but that does mean I can aim to get him to bed earlier and ge him to catch up on sleep.

Tonight we are going to try swaddling first, if no luck then we will tackle no dummy at the weekend!

I can't thank you enough for your help and kind words - they really have made a difference.

x