bedtime crying

[ekaleksak]

I have a 4 month old who I can not seem to get to sleep at bedtime.  For naps I put her in her crib, make sure she can get her thumb to her mouth, and typically I can leave the room.  Occasionally I have to stay for a minute of two to keep her calm, if my 3-year old son has been playing with her too close to nap time for example.  She takes the naps fine, but in the evening nothing seems to work.  I can get her calmed down and she seems to be alseep, but a few minutes later she is wide awake and screaming again.  Her third nap is typically less than an hour, then she is up for a short time and then in the bath.  After bath I go into her room (around 6:30) nurse her, and then try to get her into bed.  She can continue her crying, almost asleep, awake, crying again pattern right up until 10, when I would dream feed.  What can I do to help her fall asleep in the evening?  I know that nursing her in my bed and then staying there with her until 10 will work, I have on occasion been that desperate, but it is really not a habbit that I want to get into.  I would definately appreciate any thoughts.

[chell]

Hi, sorry that your having these difficulites at the moment. Are you following 4 hour EASY? If you have nursed her in bed on more than a few occasions, it may have already become a habit. I am also wondering if she is overtired, as the behaviours you describe would fit in with this. How long is she up for after her last nap, and what other naps does she have during the day?

[ekaleksak]

She is good about her morning nap, usually 1.5 - 2 hours.  Her second nap is usually the same length of time in the crib, but broken up.  She doesn't sleep straight through.  Then her third nap, before bath time is usually just a cat nap, less than an hour.  She does eat on a four hour schedule during the day.

[chell]

Hi, that sounds about right. For a 4 month old the approximate maximum awake time is2-2.5 hours, before they need to nap. I'm not sure if you swaddle, but it can help, also ensuring you have a good wind down ritual before nap and bedtimes...see p 181-182 the Baby Whisperer Solves all Your Problems. It sounds as though the day gets progressively difficult- which could indicate increased tiredness throughout the day, plus the falling to sleep, then waking, constantly - falling asleep, probably when she is exhausted.

 I would make sure you really observe her, so that you don't miss the window of opportunity to get them to go down more easily, once past this you're into the overtired realm and it becomes much harder to get them to sleep.

Keep activity times short and not too stimulating, act on your observations, rather than sticking to EASY exactly.

Use the 4-S wind down ritual.

Use pat/shh to help her get off to sleep, but try to let her do the last little bit of falling asleep herself, in her crib.

Give these a go for a few days adn see if it helps.

Let me know how you do or if htere is anythign eles you want to discuss.

[Katw]

Hi

Another thing you might want to tryis to make bath time earlier. When my DD was 5months she suddenly got wound up at bedtime, yet day naps were fine. This went on for ages until I moved her bathtime earlier and then she had quiet time before her bottle and bed.

It definately helped us as I think the bath was overstimulating her, just a thought anyway.

[chell]

Good idea Kat.