9-months old and too many sleep problems to count.

[llmommy]

I need help! 

Logan is 9 month old and NEVER sleeps more than 2 hours in a row. He gets nursed, walked or rocked to sleep for both his naps and every waking all night long. My husband, who works 3 jobs, wound up sleeping with Logan in the rocking chair last night. This has to stop.

I don't know where to start. He's 26 pounds, almost walking and very strong which makes it a really physical struggle to keep him lying down or wrapped up at all. He likes to stand in his crib too which is a problem.

I know we've left this really late but we always thought he'd just sort of start sleeping through the night on his own like his big brother did. Unfortunately he's sleeping worse now than he did as a newborn. 

HELP!!

[llmommy]

Here are the answers to the questions from the Night Wakings forum:

How old is your child? 9 months old

What’s his/her daily routine? Up at 7:00 (ish), Breakfast, Nap at 10:30 (45 minutes), Lunch, Nap at 2:30 (45 minutes), Dinner at 5:30, bath at 6:00, BF to sleep at 6:45 pm.

What’s nap routine? Usually Baby Einstein in his comfy chair for a few minutes, then gets nursed to sleep or sleeps with Daddy in the armchair.

How long are naps? 45 minutes with the rare 90 minute nap

What's bedtime routine? Time? Dinner, bath, nursing to sleep at 6:45 or 7:00

Do you bottle or breastfed?? Breastfeed

How much? or how long?  On demand. Usually every 2-3 hours or so

If breastfed.. one side or both?? (at each feed) One side. Always have because of a foremilk imbalance. If I feed on both sides he gets gassy - pediatricians & LC advice.

How many wakes per night? 5-6!!

What’s your LO like when waking at night? How long is he/she up?  Cries and nurses to sleep. Sometimes we can get him back into his crib but usually he wind up in our bed or sleeping with Daddy in the chair.

When you go to him/her is she fussing or crying? Or is it a mantra cry? CRYING.

What have you tried to settle?? We've tried rocking and patting but he usually wants to nurse or cuddle for HOURS.

What do you do for A time and how long is it? We play on the floor, he crawls, pulls up and cruises. Sometimes Baby Einstein before a nap.

Are there developmental issues such as teething or milestones? He's just gotten his 3rd tooth and expect there will be a 4th on the way. He also gets stuffed up at night and we often have to suction his nose which is disruptive.

Do they have a prop? If so what is it? No prop. We've tried binkies but he just wants his Boobies. 

Do they have a lovie? See above.

[Mia & Scarlett's Mummy]

Hello!

Right, goodness me, I'm worn out after reading that!!  Seriously, thank you for such detailed information.  So to summarise ds associates the breast with sleep, each time he wakes he does not (yet) have the skills to put himself back to sleep and so he cries until he has the breast.  So the boobies are the prop.

Mmmmm. this really reminds me of a babywhispering episode I watched about a little boy called Mack who was 8-9 months old and constantly night waking because of this exact same problem.  Traceys answer was to do PU/PD - which cracked it after a few nights.

Are you familiar with this method and do you have both of Traceys book - there is an indepth explanation on how PU/PD should be used on babies over eight months on pp.242-246 of bw solves all your problems.

If you don't have this book I'd recommend you get it and quick!!  In the meantime if you don't have it I can pm you the method you need to use.  If you do decide to go for it there is also a PU/PD board with lots of info and where you can get lots of support while you're teaching ds independant sleep.

PU/PD is the method to use to improve naps and nightime sleep - although you tend to get better results at night at first because you have a longer time period to work with.

Let me know of you need any more help.

[llmommy]

Thank you for responding.

I just got him down for a nap. I put him in his crib awake. I did have to swaddle him because it's the only way to keep him from struggling to stnd up. It took 35 minutes of patting and crying off and on but he's asleep and has been for 40 minutes! 

I'd love that method if you could. I've had the BW book from the library and I'll get it out again but it could be a week or two before I can get it.

Thanks again. And wish us luck. 

[alyssa1]

I feel that same way with my 14 month old.  We have had multiple sleep problems.  He used to wake in the night many times and want fed (the bottle to help get back to sleep).  We knew that we had to stop but it was so hard.  We gradually stopped going in when he woke in the night. When we would hear him, we would wait 5 min. the first night and then gradually increase the times each night.  When we would go in, we would try to comfort him by telling him it was ok and laying him back down and telling him it was still time to sleep.  After many nights - it worked!  We still have the occassional wake up, but not often.  We also decided that past a certain time in the night, if he woke up, we would feed him and then gradually increased that.  I really don't know the right answer but what we did seemed to work for in the night anyways. 

[Mia & Scarlett's Mummy]

PU/PD for the ages 8 -12 months:

When dc is in their cot and they cry out for you you go into their room and wait for them to stand up rather than pick them up straight away, the theory being babies of this age settle alot quicker out of your arms - only completely pick him up if he's very upset.  The actual quote from the book regarding the technicalities of the technique is:

"While standing at the side of the cot, put your arm underneath her knees, and with your other arm around her back, turn her and lay her back down on the mattress, so she's looking away from you, not at your face.  Each time wait until she stands up all the way before you lay her back down again.  Then pick her up and immediately lay her straight back down the same way.  Reassure her with a firm hand on her back "It's okay darling, you're just going to sleep."  At this age you start to use your voice even more....She'll eventually start to run out of steam.  Then, instead of standing, she'll sit up.  Each time, lay her back down"

That's the basics of the technique at this age.  Before you do it though I really would recommend you read the whole chapter on PU/PD in tbw solves all your problems just so you know exactly why you are doing what you are doing.  I found with my lo that she got very upset and the thing that got me through was being able to recall Tracey words of wisdom on the technique and the whole theory base around it.  Its emotionally and physically exhausting so arm yourself with as much knowledge as you can to prepare yourself!

Also, visit the PUPD board - here's a few threads you may find interesting to start you off

https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=36950.0

https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=28650.0

https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=3189.0

PUPD is really, really hard work but it is so worthwhile - especially when you get your nights back!

I really hope this helps you - let us know how you get on and any more questions, just ask! 

[llmommy]

Thanks so much for the advice. I was doing all patting and shhhing yesterday and last night. I tried pu/pd for his morning nap today and it worked really well. After about 4 pu/pds he just turned his head to the side, stopped crying, fiddled with the crib bars for about 10 minutes and then fell asleep!! 

I will try more pu/pd tonight and less patting and shhhing. Thanks again. There is light at the end of this long, sleepless tunnel and I'm very excited.

[Mia & Scarlett's Mummy]

Great, I'm thrilled for you.

Let us know how you get on.

[llmommy]

Oh dear, things are not going well.

For the first few days we were doing really well and now we are on day 6 and it's awful.

He is taking 2 naps a day which take about 15-20 minutes to get him to sleep and then he is only sleeping for 45 minutes instead of the 90 he was doing the frist few days.

He's fighting sleep big time at night!! He goes down at 6:00, fights for about 20-30 minutes. Wakes at 10:00, fights for 30-45 minutes, wakes every 2 hours or so after that and fights sleep then too.

It is currently 10:35 and we have been trying to get him back to sleep for almost an hour. I give up. 

We are having some pretty heavy duty construction going on at our house for the next week which is going to majorly interfere with nap times so I think we will start again when that construction is over and we can be consistent. Hopefully by then this current bout of teething will be finished with.

I'll try to get my hands on a copy of the book this week and give it a good read.

This sucks. 

[Mia & Scarlett's Mummy]

It does indeed suck big time when it goes wrong.

Really try to get hold of the book - its really inspiring and as you will read it's perfectly normal - and predictable -  for it to all fall apart just when you think you've got it.  Tracey highlights that you can quite easily go back to square one with this method - especially with little boys.

Stick with it though because you and ds have both proved that it can work for him.

We are also having construction done on our house (well our garden) and Mia is not sleeping very well at the mo because of it - why do they have to be so noisy?

Please stick with it though - hope you enjoy reading the book.