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Author Topic: SA w/ mom... screams w/dad  (Read 1029 times)

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Offline RachelC

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SA w/ mom... screams w/dad
« on: May 22, 2006, 22:58:09 pm »
Ok, so we think our lo has SA with me.  She is all ready for bed and I handed her off to dh so he can put her down and I can go to the gym.  She screams as soon as I leave.  Should i stay so she learns that I am still here, or do I just leave them to 'fight it out'?  We put my shirt in her crib tonight, but dh hasn't even laid her down yet, so I don't know if that will help.
Any advice would be appreciated... my dd1 didn't go through this... she was Daddy's girl (still is) and this one is Mommy's girl.
~Rachel
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Offline JennŠ

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Re: SA w/ mom... screams w/dad
« Reply #1 on: May 23, 2006, 17:33:07 pm »
Here's to hoping someone has an idea.  Mine goes down much easier for me than dh, so I feel your pain.  So why does she always talk about "dadada"?  ::) 
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Offline Jaime

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Re: SA w/ mom... screams w/dad
« Reply #2 on: May 23, 2006, 19:43:59 pm »
if you're only going to the gym once a week i might leave them to fight it out that one time... but if you are going out several times a week i might wait to put her to bed first if possible. 

though truthfully - you really could go either way on that one!  how's that for a waffle!   :P
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Offline Mom2katiebug

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Re: SA w/ mom... screams w/dad
« Reply #3 on: May 23, 2006, 20:13:22 pm »
Hi Rachel.  I want to lurk as Katie is doing something similar.  She'll go to bed for either of us, but keeps checking to make sure we're still there.  Those cute little eyes just keep popping open and if we're not there, she lets us know she misses us by screaming the house down!  Not sure if this will pass on its own or if we should do WalkIn/WalkOut.  PU/PD didn't work well for us as she's a spirited LO.
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Offline *Nicola*

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Re: SA w/ mom... screams w/dad
« Reply #4 on: May 23, 2006, 21:22:42 pm »
Hiya Rachel,

(((HUGS))). It's such a stressful thing.  When Ciara was doing this I would just leave if I was planning to go out, but make sure she knew I was leaving.  This was the same for whoever she was with - Dp, family, childminder.  It was really difficult for dp, as I think he felt bad that she didn't want him.

At bedtime we were also quite firm, but did go in to check on her and reassure her - kiss then right back out again.

It did pass but it was a difficult time.  For us, consistency was key x
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Offline RachelC

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Re: SA w/ mom... screams w/dad
« Reply #5 on: May 23, 2006, 22:59:37 pm »
Thanks ladies.
Before I pulled out of the driveway last night, she was asleep  ::)  I think she was overtired as she was a little noisy last night, but no wake ups, except she did wake early this morning.  Of course, we didn't help the situation today by taking her to the zoo all day and not having good naps   ::).  I put her to bed tonight and it took 15 minutes (with me standing with her.... I haven't had the guts to start walk in walk out yet)
~Rachel
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Offline Mom2katiebug

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Re: SA w/ mom... screams w/dad
« Reply #6 on: May 24, 2006, 02:23:28 am »
Rachel - As I was sitting in the dark room watching Katie fall asleep tonight, I was wondering if instead of WI/WO if this would work.  Just slowly move the chair to the foot of her crib and/or further away from her crib.  That way I slowly get harder to see and can eventually slip out entirely.  Do you think that might work for you?
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Offline RachelC

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Re: SA w/ mom... screams w/dad
« Reply #7 on: May 24, 2006, 12:42:48 pm »
I have thought of that Casey.  Jalyn's room is so small, 4 steps and I'm out the door.  As soon as I am out of sight, she screams  :-\ She slept through last night (I only heard her whimper 2 or 3 times)  I know she was overtired and she was up early this morning.  We'll get there.  But, when DH is home and can, he will be putting her down so she does get used to the idea that it is not always Mommy.
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