I think you have replaced one prop (binkie) with another (mommy and daddy). We used to be the parents that laid beside our dd for 45mins until she fell asleep then had to creep out of her room.
It seems like so long ago but it was only 3mths ago (dd was 2yrs 2mths old) that we bit the bullet and moved her into a big girl's bed and changed our bedtime routine:clean teeth, bedtime stories, let her choose a favorite toy to sleep with, cuddle, kiss & hugs, turn off lights & leave the room straight away.
A few things I've done that seems to work for us:
1. Before I start the last story, I tell her what is going to happen after the story is finished: cuddle & kiss, sleep on her own while I will go downstairs and that she's a big girl now so there is no need to cry because I’m right downstairs.
2. While we are cuddling, I would again tell her that she is a big girl now & big girls sleep by themselves, how proud I am of her, and that her favorite toy will look after her while she sleeps.
3. The next morning, when I wake her, I would say how proud I am of her for sleeping on her own and also, in front of her, make a big deal of telling people we knew.
4. While I'm reading or if I see anything relevant during the day, I would point out pictures of kids with their own beds & reinforce how she is a big girl just like them with their own beds.
It sound tedious but its better than having to regress to those horrible nights again.
Did it go smoothly from day 1? No, it was rough for a week and I started to think that its too traumatic for her.
She would cling on to me for dear life (knowing what's going to happen next) and cried while I separate myself from her, turn off the light & leave the room. However the crying only continued for less than a minute and she's all quiet. The longer I stayed, the more dramatic it got.
She was waking up very early around 5.45am but that fixed itself after a week.
Did it get better? Yes!!!
After a week. She didn't cling on to me too much, and there was minimal or no crying when I left the room. She was also sleeping better: not a sound until 6-6.30am.
Then she started telling me that I should be very proud of her for sleeping on her own. At night she tells me that I'm going to be downstairs while she sleeps. :-)
Why did it work? I think it was because I was extremely consistent & strongly believed that any slight regression to old habits or new bad habits would come back to haunt me when the baby arrives, and I would not be able to physically or mentally deal with it.
