Old wives' tale?

[tuta]

Hi ladies, I had a conversation with my Nana last night and I am a bit worried.  Let me give you the facts first:

Nana had three sons, all were bottle fed, the last one had a hernia which they operated on at 7mo.

DS is nearly 14 weeks, has just gotten over chickenpox and has (in the last 2 weeks) become increasingly bothered by wind and has stopped sleeping as much at night.  When I was talking to my Nana on the telephone two nights ago she heard him crying, I thought it was a 'I have wind so give me some milk to help it through' cry - which I did.  Last night when I talked to her she asked if I ever heard gurgling sounds coming from his stomach - I said yes - and she old me he was starving - she based this observation on the fact that she underfed her youngest (as a newborn 7lb baby when he was actually 10lb at birth) and he screamed just like DS and had gurgling noises in his stomach because if there is not enough food there air will take its place.  She thinks I should give him a bottle because I a not giving him enough food.  I just want to check with the experts, I think that she is wrong - but hey you can't really tell your 86yo Nana to back off can you?  Thanks   

[Erin (redstarfalling)]

No, you can't tell her to back off, even if she's wrong! 

If he's gaining weight well, then you have enough milk.  What is his weight gain like? Tummies gurgle as they digest. So even if he's eating well, his tummy will gurgle.  More so if there's gas - and gas can come from a poor latch (swallowing air as he eats) or from things like hicups or crying (you swallow air then too).  Try burping him more, check your latch and Nana should give the poor guy a break - chickenpox at 14 weeks!! 

[Samuel's mum]

Tummies gurgle during digestion and it doesn't have to mean starvation. Very gassy babies with serious gurgling can also be the guzzlers with MAJOR weight gain/ oversupply etc.

Your poor nan has obviously got a sad history which is bound to colour how to sees any new baby and 'hears' their cries. If her youngest had a hernia with any kind of complication (i.e. occasional strangulated intestines) this may have contributed to his problems and his noises.

He's had chickenpox poor bloke. He's recovering. Go by weight gain and wet nappies (around 6 in 24 hours - don't judge by poo) more than phone calls with well-meaning nans.

[clh]

I agree with pp's.  If your ds has enough wet diapers, seems satisfied after nursings, and is gaining, then you have nothing to worry about.    I'm sure any routine that you had established (EASY or otherwise) has been disrupted by his sickness (you poor things! ) and it'll take him a while to get back to his normal. 

BTW...  *my* stomach gurgles and let's just say that I'm certainly not starving!   (I know it's a bit different with babies, but that was my first thought, it made me smile, and I hope it does you, too.)

[tuta]

Thanks ladies, logically I knew she was misinterpreting but I think that she doesn't really approve of BF and so if there is a 'problem' she automatically thinks that that is the route of the problem.  The other thing is that when she asks about the kids it is always 'how are they sleeping/eating/behaving' and it sounds to her like I have one big list of problems (which I don't).  She sort of thinks that I am a C grade mother because of the old 'In my day' stuff we didn't allow this that or the other.  Also if it didn't happen to her then you are sort of making it up or you brought it on yourself.  When I was pg with DS I had SPD, I was trying to explain it to her and all she could say was 'well I didn't have any of that stuff' and then tells me about how she 'overcame' her morning sickness by sheer willpower and making herself sick.  I contribute as well I let her make me feel crap, I always feel like a silly kid who doesn't ever quite get things right KWIM?  Anyway DS is now crying for food so I must go but thanks again. 

[clh]

Awww... Hang in there.  We'll be here to support you.  I remember hating it when folks would tell me that formula (or whatever it was that I wasn't doing) was the answer to all my problems.      You're doing a great thing for your lo. 

[Erin (redstarfalling)]

Seriously!  If you have a "good" baby who eats and sleeps like everyone else expects them to, then it's because of the type of baby you have - ie. a "good baby".  If there are ANY "problems" then it's because of bad parenting. RIGHT!