Drpping a feed = Boob obsession!!

[JKL]

Hi!  Wanted to get someone elses thoughts on this.  I have reluctantly decided to start weaning my 13 month old son very, very slowly (I am very susceptible to plugged ducts and mastitis, and still wake up engorged in the mornings, even though he hasn't BF in the night for months!!!)  We were on 4 feeds a day (wake up, 11, 4, and before bed).  I dropped the 4 (he was hardly taking any anyway), and moved the 11 later in the day, with lunch about 11 and a BF at 1:30 or 2.  At the same time, DS decided to start transitioning to 1 nap (his idea, not mine!).  Anyway, literally beginning the day I dropped that BF, DS has been requesting to nurse at random times (never asked before, just always took it at the usual times when I offered).  Also, he is constantly coming up to me and lifting my shirt and laying his head against my boobs--again, he had never done this before.  Is he trying to tell me something???  I feel like we are nursing even more than before (I don't refuse him when he asks).  This is all complicated by the fact that I really do not want to stop BF, but several factors (I want to get pg again later this year, and AF has not yet returned; DH and i want to go away for a weekend in May; I am totally exhausted and can't figure out what else could be causing this--posted about this before; I have zero sex drive, and DH is really urging me to stop BF) made me start the process.  I'm so torn!  Anyone else with a similar experience?

Jen

[daisymelan]

Does your lo drink out of a sippy or cup of any sort?  Even a bottle?  I don't think you need to wean in ordre to be able to take a trip away.  Of course, when you return you may not have much of a supply if you haven't been pumping, but you can deal with that when the time comes.

As for wanting to get pregnant again, that's a personal decision, but this is my thought process.  I was in a similar situation to you and was bfing ds1 and wanted to try for #2, but my period had not returned.  I debated about weaning ds1 in order to try for #2 and almost did, but then a lady on this site reminded me that even if you do conceive, there are no guarantees and do you want to stop bfing ds1 just to try with no certainty?  It hit home and I didn't wean, well lo and behold, a month later I was pregnant without having a period.

But again I want to emphasize that I do believe it's a very personal choice and I'm only sharing my experience.

I don't have much advice on stopping your shirt from being lifted, etc.  So hopefully some other bws come to the aid.   

[LyndaManus]

I am not there yet, but, from what I understand, the shirt pulling and all of that is very natural.  BFing is an extremely bonding experience for you and your lo - not just a nutritional experience.  Most likely he is not hungry but wants that bonding time.

As the pp said, stopping bfing is a very personal experience, but should you choose to quit, maybe try to think of other things to replace it with.  Going back to recommendations from when our lo's were 0-3mths old and wanting to suckle all the time - maybe replacing that time with some snuggle time would help (schedule it in when you use to do the feeding instead of waiting for him to come to you - maybe hold him tightly while reading a book or something like that).  Also, maybe schedule some alone time this weekend to run some errands during your feeding times so dh can hang out with ds (out of site/out of mind).

Good luck!

[JKL]

Thanks guys!  Chase takes a sippy very well, and even drinks cows milk from it if I give it to him.  I think I was just using the trip as sort of a goal date to be done BF.  Daisymelan, thanks for sharing your personal story about TTC and BF.  I have actually had the same thoughts--and feel guilty about stopping something my son really enjoys for the sake of another child who does not even exist yet.  Hmmmm....
  Anyone have any statistics on increasing fertility by reducing the # of feeds vs. totally weaning (I know, it's different for everyone...)

[daisymelan]

I do not have stats, but we had dropped down to 2 bf a day.