long naps causing nightwaking?

[lcalado]

Hi there, I would like some opinions as to whether my ds's naptimes could be causing his increase in nightwakings. DH believes that 13mo ds is napping too much, but I don't agree. Here is our current schedule (times are approximate, of course):

6:15 - wake
9:45 - first nap for 60-75 minutes
2:30 - second nap for 60 minutes
7:15 - asleep for the night

Ds has NEVER slept through the night. A few weeks ago, he was only waking twice to nurse (that's a whole 'nother issue), but I was okay with it because NW was obviously habit and I felt I could break him of it when I wanted. Then I stopped giving him his reflux meds. I had weaned him down to a small amount and then just stopped completely to see if he really needed it. I believe this is what is causing NW, because ds is also having a harder time settling to sleep, so I think he's a bit uncomfortable with the changes in his stomach. At least he is not screaming in pain like in the past, but he is waking every 90 minutes or so.

About a week after the change to the meds, I tried waking him early from the morning nap to see if I could move him to one longer nap in the afternoon. He was cranky for days and when I switched him back to the two nap schedule yesterday, it was like he was very overtired, he was dying for sleep. So he slept a total of 2 1/2 hours at naps yesterday and woke constantly through the night, so my dh is convinced he napped too much. Dh doesn't seem to realize that ds has been sleeping poorly like this for at least a week, even when he didn't have as much naptime!

As far as other potential impacts on NW, ds is getting his molars, but I tried giving him Motrin a couple of nights and it made no difference. He's been walking for 2 months now, so I know new milestones are not an issue. I'm sure it's the reflux, but I just want to be sure I'm doing the right thing for naps. I thought the signal for making the 2-to-1 nap switch was when the lo started resisting a nap or bedtime. Is this correct? Are there other signs? Ds doesn't resist sleep at all if I stick with the above schedule, it's actually easier to put him down. Am I doing the right thing? If so, help me convice dh that ds really needs this sleep! 

Thanks!
Liesl

[Layla]

Although some are on 1 nap at 12 months, most still need 2 (or a combination of both).

I don't think he's getting too much sleep at all and like you said, you did try the 1 nap but he only got overtired so I would let him have 2. Some do limit the morning nap in order to get a long pm nap but if your lo is still taking a pm nap of 1hr (at least) then I would say its ok. You can try to limit the morning nap to 45mins to get a longer pm nap.....

You did mention that you used to BF him at night and its cut down to 2 feeds. Do you think this has become a prop and he is waking to be fed back to sleep??? At 13 months, as long as he is eating well and had enough fluids, etc... I wouldn't think he still needs to be fed at night. I would work on eliminating these feeds and try to soothe him in the cot. How does he fall asleep at naps and bedtime? Does he fall asleep at the breast? with a dummy? do you rock to sleep or does he go to sleep on his own??? (sorry stupid question...reading the post you mention that you had weaned him... is that from the feeds or from the meds?)

I'll see if I can get someone to help you with reflux...

[lcalado]

Thanks for your reply! I have weaned him both from the meds and from the breast for a few feeds. He's doing great on cow's milk and I can tell that his nighttime feeds have become more for comfort than anything else. He almost never falls asleep at the breast. At naptimes, I read a few books, sing to him, and lay him down. Bedtime is almost the same except for a bf between books and singing. He does want my hand on him while he falls asleep and this definitely has become a prop. My dd was the same way at this age and we had to use gw to stop her nightwakings. You'd think I'd have learned the first time around!

He is very cranky today and I can tell that his teeth are really bothering him. On the reflux board, many posts mention that reflux can flare-up during teething. I think I might put him back on the meds just until him teeth come in...

Thanks for reassuring me about the naps! I also read the faq about average sleep and he's right on target (without taking the nw into account).

[sandraorion]

Yes, I would definitely put him back on meds for reflux before messing up with his naps.

As far as teething goes, our experience was that if we gave Motrin before bedtime, ds has a much better night than if given in the middle of the night. Don't know why, but was definitely the case.

For us the signs that he needed to cut down a nap or was getting too much sleep were resisting a nap, and bedtime routine dragging too long because he wasn't tired enough. Nightwakings were result of habit, overtiredness, and/or physical discomfort.

HTH

[imsmum]

I don't think that napping too much is the problem but sometimes if the nap lasts too long/ends too late in the day, then they are not tired enough to fall asleep at their usual bedtime.  Result:  they fall asleep too late and have NW's.

Ps.  Motrin always gets my lo wired so I can only give Tylenol at bedtime.

[lcalado]

Thanks, everyone, for your input. I feel much more confident in my decision to stick with the 2 naps and go back to the meds. Ds was super cranky today, I'm sure from the teeth, so I gave him Tylenol before bed. If that doesn't make a difference, tomorrow night I will put him back on the reflux meds. He's been off of them for 2 weeks already, so I would have expected him to be adjusting by now.

I'm just frustrated with dh's lack of support. He thinks ds is only waking from habit and we should let him cry it out. I told him that I know something is wrong and I would rather put ds back on the meds to see if that helps him. I don't want my lo waking so often because he's uncomfortable and then be subjected to coping with it without meds.

[Layla]

It is very hard when you don't the support of dh. Letting your ds cio will only make things worse to the point where he will lose trust in his parents and thats the last thing you or dh want. First eliminate other things (like reflux) and if the last issue is habit, we can help you work that out with much gentler methods we recommend for toddlers (like pd, wi/wo or gw).

Let us know how it goes
Layla

[sandraorion]

Layla, what is gw?

[Layla]

Gradual Withdrawal.

 

[sandraorion]

Oh OK. Thanks.

[donna_issabella]

Hi Liesl,

Just FYI, if you are giving him Motrin for his teething and you stopped his reflux meds - which is what BTW? - his reflux is probably the thing bothering him. Remember that motrin is ibuprofen, which is a medicine that can cause and aggravate GERD and stomach ulcers. He might not be in enough pain to cry, but mighthave sufficient discomfort to rouse him in between sleeping cycles.

We ALWAYS ask patients when they come in with acid reflux or heartburn whether they use NSAID's - non steroidal anti inflammatory drugs - and if that is the case, they are advised to stop it completely. If they do use it occasionally, they are advised to use it with food. I know with my lo, when i want him to take meds, i give it before a feed, otherwise he just isn't hungry enough to take the meds. And motrin on an empty tummy already irritated due to reflux will just make things worse.

Sorry for the rambling. Perhaps just something to keep in the back of your mind.

DI