Hi there,
I desperately need an objective and less tired mind to just give our routine a once over please!
DS was a real sleeper until about 8 weeks of age. He slept 3 out of 4 hours most days, gained weight well with only feeding 6 times a day, with the occasional Growth Spurt. Then his reflux started in all seriousness at about 7-8 weeks and he also started sleeping 45 minute naps in the evenings after his bath. So from 7pm he would sleep 45 minutes on the dot and then wake up and be impossible to get to sleep - although yawning like crazy - until 10/11pm feed, then go down for the night basically and wake once for a feed at about 3 am. This all resolved at about 10 weeks - I think his clock needed resetting to 7-7, where I think he thought it was 10-10, IYKWIM.
OK, so at the time we got him to sleep 'for the night' at 9-10 weeks, we started him on a 3 hour EASY. He then started sleeping very poorly in the early morning hours. Very restless and squirmy, which I attributed to the reflux. (Rightly or wrongly, tell me what you think please! note that he was started on treatment at this time, so not untreated reflux) Especially after his 3am feed he would take 20 minutes to fall asleep and seemed not to enter deep sleep. Grunting, sighing, squirming. But would not overtly wake up.
Just to say here, he is on omeprazole and domperidone for his reflux, and he has no props. He has been falling asleep independently now for weeks - naps and bedtime, but some days does need me to pat him a bit when he is fidgety/crying. But as soon as he stops crying, I stop patting and leave the room, whilst his eyes still open - is that right? Sometimes I need to pick him up, pat him on my shoulder until he stops crying, then put him down, and if he cries I start patting in the crib. If he doesn't settle, I repeat the above. Few weeks ago I did this minimally, but the past week more, it feels. I am writing an exam next week, quite crucial for me to pass, so I am very stressed and anxious, so perhaps I am feeling his crying at bed time is more/ my tolerance is less, and I might be picking him up sooner than usual.
OK, sorry for all the info... Must be a bit OCD
So we sorted out the short naps - increased A time, double swaddled and mommy hung over the crib side for two weeks + patting. He fell into a 3.5 -4 hour EASY routine that seems to be working well for us, all by himself, smart DS, which is:
730 Wake and Meds
800 Eat
9-915 wind down and Sleep
11/1115 Wake
1130 Eat
1300 Sleep
1500 Wake and Meds
1530 Eat
1645 Catnap - most days goes down OK for this nap, but Thursday he fought it TERRIBLY!! Yesterday we ran errands here and he slept for 30 minutes.
1730- 1745 Wake, Go for a walk in his pouch
1800 Meds
1820 Bath time
1840 Bottle and singing - if hubby does the feed, CD with lullabies
1900 Bed - he can take from 5-20 minutes to fall asleep here (video monitor), for 6-7 weeks we have never had to go in to resettle him, we would put him in crib awake and close the door, he would grunt a bit sometimes, mostly be quiet, but yesterday, for first time in ages, he cried and we had to go in twice to pat and even after he moaned for quite a bit, no full blown cry, but enough whining that I wasn't sure whether to go in or not. Each time I got to his door he would stop before I could open the door. He took 15 minutes all together to fall asleep.
2200-2300 DF He has been waking up the past week or so when we pick him up, but falls asleep whilst drinking.
Now, here is where my problem begins - or rather manifests itself.
He slept through the first time at 3 months of age, the evening after his 3 month jabs and has done so every now and again. He would sometimes wake 4-5 am and I used to feed him, but for the preceding weeks he would only take 2 oz in 20 minutes, so we realised it was habit and eliminated the feed successfully 2 weeks ago. But for the past week he has woken up every morning, ranging from 4-6 am - generally 5-6, but this am he started crying at 340am. He usually lies awake and flails his arms about etc for about 1 hour before starting his loud cry. He lies and grunts and squirms but doesn't cry until after the hour. Then I go and settle him. Used to take 5-10 minutes, but earlier the week took sooo long and then I remembered someone saying there is a 4 month GS, so we fed him and he took 4 oz. So I upped his daytime feeds and he hasn't needed a feed, but still wakes up and needs resettling.
Earlier the week he cried on and off for 40 minutes between 5-6 am with me going in and out patting until we gave some paracetamol, as I thought he might have been uncomfortable for some reason. He then slept for 2 hours, so I don't think it could have been hunger.
Why does he wake up? And why does he need resettling by mommy/daddy if he can fall asleep independently? Note: when he slept through the routine was pretty much the same as it is here, only difference is he woke up at 8 am. He then started waking at 7 30, and we moved to the current plan. His sleep cues have all but disappeared and I usually follow the clock. He does sometimes yawn, but that could be after 45 minutes A time. Mostly he starts yawning once he is in his crib, and then falls asleep within 5 - 10 minutes (day time naps.)
My thoughts: is the DF disturbing his sleep? after explaining to hubby WHY we DF btw 10-11 pm, he proceeded to DF him at 12am last night
, and then reswaddled him, which woke ds up more - on monitor his eyes were open 10 minutes after hubby put him down in crib afterwards, so I assume he woke up. Or is the swaddle a prop? Some mornings I have seen him wake up, suck his hand - which has become unswaddled - and fall asleep again, so not sure. But my main issue is why is he waking up again, after sleeping through. He isn't rolling completely yet, goes side to side some days, rolled F --> B a few time on last Sunday, but not since and doesn't seem interested to either. I am not exactly sure whether he is teething either, as he seems to have two little peaks behind his lower gum ridge, but can't say for sure. then also I think since we changed from BF to formula - am going back to work after my exam
- his reflux has been worse. He is on a hypo allergenic feed - nutramigen - but he is definitely refluxing more and ALOT grumpier in the day time, needing me to carry him around and not even then is he happy and would he cry/squirm alot.
OK, so reading through this I realise there might be many issues contributing to his well-being, or unwell-being as it may be. The thing that definitely worries me is that I think he might becoming overtired, as he isn't sleeping that well at night. Yes he has OK naps, but where we went to solid 2 hour naps, he now wakes after 45 minutes and then falls asleep again. Last weekend we had to resettle him for both naps, which we haven't had to do for a long time and Thursday and yesterday I had to creep in and pat him for his pm nap at the 45 minute mark as he woke up and cried.
he just woke up 6 40, which is an hour early for him and also after he laid awake for an hour, that makes only about 10 hours night sleep. He is a boy that needs his sleep!! So I went and resettled him with more difficulty than normally, despite being v tired. OK, only took about 10 minutes but feels like ages if you have been up since 3 am. Mommy becoming an insomniac.
OK, so I realise many will think, this woman is crazy, complaining about *nothing* and also, how daft can she be, she needs to sort out the reflux - which we are doing, by seeing the paediatrician on Tuesday - but do you think that the DF is counter productive? I mean, if he is going to wake up in any case, we might as well not wake him, and feed when he does wake, right? Also, even though the reflux is a bit worse, I don't think it is the main problem, as he settles reasonably ok. I mean if he was hungry or in pain, one would think he would not fall asleep and sleep for another 2.5-3 hours after, right?
Now, having said he might be overtired, looking at his routine, he is getting enough sleep, right? I mean when he *does* sleep.
If you made it THIS far and have all your marbles still and made sense out of my ramblings - can you tell I am tired and very stressed??? - you deserve a Nobel Prize!!!
I would really appreciate any input.
Thank you so much!
DI