2 yo with nightmares/terrors after 3 surgerys in 3 weeks

[tinytatsmom]

Help!!
My dd who just turned 2 is now suffering from nightmares/terrors after 3 surgerys and 2 hospital stays totalling 12 days.  Some nights you can tell she is just having a bad dream and other nights she wakes up screaming and shaking.  She has never been a good sleeper but  usually she would go right back to sleep after she would wake.  Now she tries and will wake screaming minutes later.  Since her surgeries I have been going to sleep with her and if she is having a bad night will sleep with her, because she still has a tube coming out of her kidney and draining into a urine bag.(we are afraid that she will pull it out and end up in surgery again.)  Once things are good medically we will work on her falling asleep indpendantly (she did b4 this all started), and sleeping alone.
How did you help a lo that is so absolutley terrified?  She actually wakes up saying no be all done which is what she would say when they had to do anying in the hospital.  To make matters worse we have another procedure next week which will just add to the whole mess.
Anyone, anywhere with a suggestion?

[M and N's Mom]

I don't have any advice, I just wanted to send you and your LO great big {{{HUGS!}}}  Hopefully someone will be along to help but I'm sure the fact that you being in her room will help with the fears over time.

[em_here]

Bless you and your lo, what a rollercoaster. Does she have a lovie she takes in with her, that would comfort her at night.  I also think that being a bed with you for a while will help her, just the closeness and security of it all, will hopefully help her heal over time.

Sorry I cannot be more helpful to you, big hugs, you sound like a very strong mum xxx

[tinytatsmom]

Thanks for the support.  She does have a blanket and a stuffed animal but nothing seems to help during the time of the episode.

[mari]

Hello.  I am sorry to hear of your LO's ordeals, I hope that she is well and truly on the mend.

Have you seen the thread about Gradual Withdrawal?  I think that this is what your little one needs until she gets back on track.

This is the link.  Have a read and see what you think.

https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=80750.0

[tinytatsmom]

Thanks Mari,
That is a great link.  Where do I start as right now I lay with her til she falls asleep and leave.  I come back if needed.  I have done the blow up bed in the past with good success but I tried that a couple of weeks back and getting her to fall asleep was a scream fest any suggestions?
Tracy
P.S  Your son looks just like Daniel Cook - a kid on a Canadian T.V show

[mari]

Well, when I started Sleep training Alex I had a bed next to her and she did cry, but I laid there anyway reassuring her and telling her that it was ok, mum is here and we need to go asleep.  It's letting them cio as you are with them, tending to them and helping them through it.

Is he over the surgery and well?  If so then it's ok to start now, but if he is still ill or in pain then I would continue to do what you have been doing until he is fully ready to start sleeping independantly.

[mari]

Your son looks just like Daniel Cook - a kid on a Canadian T.V show

Hm, had a look at the link and not sure about that!     Nathan is a better looking kid don't you think! 

[tinytatsmom]

I think that Tatiana is now over all the medical stuff for at least 3 months (we are praying so anyway), and we don't think that she is in any pain.  I was considering putting a chair beside her bed so I could be closer to her and rub her back if she needed.  Then I was hoping I could gradually move it further away.  I was also thinking I would do the bed on the floor to try and get her thru the night as well.
Your son only reminds me of Daniel cook in the close up picture and your right he is cuter and probably not as annoying.
Tracu

[em_here]

Glad to hear that your lo does not have to have anything done for a bit. How are you feeling?

[tinytatsmom]

I am feeling a bit nervous/excited right now as we are hoping she won't have a relapse.  3 days ago I went with my SIL to my niece's grade 5 class to thank them as they have been praying for her to get better.  All I could do while they prayed to thank God was stand there with tears streaming down my face.   So at least I am not feeling like an emotional wreck anymore.  Check out what I wrote in great and not so great news on "i have never been so happy to change a diaper".  Sorry don't now how to add the link.
Tracy

[tinytatsmom]

I am feeling a bit nervous/excited right now as we are hoping she won't have a relapse.  3 days ago I went with my SIL to my niece's grade 5 class to thank them as they have been praying for her to get better.  All I could do while they prayed to thank God was stand there with tears streaming down my face.   So at least I am not feeling like an emotional wreck anymore.  Check out what I wrote in great and not so great news on "i have never been so happy to change a diaper".  Sorry don't now how to add the link.
Tracy

[em_here]

I'll have a look. You must be real strong to have got through this, I admire that, you have been through so much and at least you are looking at some positives x

[mari]

I'm praying for her too Tracy, I'm glad that things seem to be going ok for you and Tatiana right now.

I found that the bed was better for me as I was so tired that I needed to sleep too!! but go with whatever you feel better with and whatever you think Tatiana will respond better to.  Just be careful not to become a prop.

Mari