Can someone plse help me drop the catnap

[*Jo*]

dont worry, he only slept an hour so he has to have a catnap. how come yesterday i get an hour and a half out of him after a 3 hour A time and today I only get an hour???

Theres just NO consistancy, its doing my head in!

[Mashi]

Could it be activity level?  The day of the longer nap was he more physical or did he do more "brain work"? 

I found at this age, for me, "A time" did not always work out to a tee -- one day would get us one length nap and another day another length.....it was frustrating, and I wish that I had just learned to roll with it a bit more, but it was impossible for me to do. It stressed me out a lot.

I learned, looking back, that a lot of my DS's lack of sleep was because he was too nosey and curious - he wanted to be awake to learn, play, roll, see, do...not to sleep.

He will get there, I promise you!

[*Jo*]

hmmm, well hes just fought me for the past 40 mins to not have a catnap, so hes not had one, hes irritable too now, grrrrrr

[Mashi]

Yes, I remember those days. I found the irritableness was from the fight. Can you have some quiet time and early bed again?  Really, what he is doing is normal, when you keep that in perspective it helps to not get angry!

Where are you -- just curious because you are at catnap time and I just did the morning nap fight!

[*Jo*]

Im in Aussie whereabouts are you?

Is it possible that he still needs the catnap, isnt ready to drop it, or is this just all part of the process? He never fights me on any other naps or even going to bed for the night, he hasnt fought the catnap in a long time, perhaps i just missed the cue (not that they are very clear these days, he usually gives them and it would be two mins later and i wouldve missed the window so i have to be on top of it)

im not even going to give him a bath tonight (just a small wash with a cloth) because he gets excited in teh bath and starts splashing like a maniac and the last thing i want is for him to get over excited.

Oh i hate these days, usually DH does the evening bath, bottle and bed and I get a rest but the last few days we havent made it in time for DH to be home for any of these so im doing everything, im feeling quite tired tonight.

[Mashi]

It's quite normal with the catnap to need it one day and then not need it for 3 or 4.  Process of dropping it.  What I did was plan a walk during that time, for 30 minutes or so, and off we would go - up to the shops to by some biscuits for DH and I to eat in front of the telly that night - anything at all. If DS slept, great, if not then at least it was quiet time in his pram, relaxing. The fresh air helped us both.  If he didn't sleep then bed was a wee bit earlier.

I hated, also, the nights when DH wasn't home in time for bath. He was so good at it, it was the first he had seen DS all day so he had the patience for him, but I was up the wall and had had enough by that time and would lose my patience. I think you are right to just do a quiet wash and massage. 

Are you sticking to a 12 hour day -- I found that getting DS into bed 12 hours after he woke really helped with the no catnap days.

(Of course you are in Oz, that makes sense now! I am in Germany now)

[*Jo*]

If i did a 12 hour day he would be in bed 10 mins ago at 5.50pm, i figured if i did that then he would be up just as early tomorrow morning as he doesnt sleep longer than 11.5 hours at the moment. Im aiming for a 6.30 bedtime, about to give him his bottle shortly and do the bedtime routine and pray for the best tonight!

[Mashi]

Yes, believe it or not we did the 545 - 545 for a while! It was really hard on us, DH getting home from work and me doing wind down for bed, dragging myself up at 545 while DH got a bit more sleep before he had to go to work....I know the stress it causes.  BUT it really does help to build up the OT when dropping the catnap. And yes, he may wake a bit before 6 again tomorrow...but once that catnap is gone, you can start pushing him 10 minutes at a time every few days, soon it will be 6-6, then 615-615....and then in another couple of months it will be where you want it.

It seems like "another couple of months" is a looooong time to keep going through it, I really know.  I know.  I promise - in two months time it will be long forgotten and things will be sooooooo much better!

[*Jo*]

its 9.20pm and ive just spent 20 mins doing Pu/Pd on my screaming son, this is ridiculous, i cant imagine doing this for the next few months, Ive never had this before and now ive had it two nights in a row!

I feel like I messed up so bad, if i had just left things the way they were this wouldnt be like this now, My poor boy was so exhausted he fell asleep at the bedtime bottle, i couldnt wake him up, he just wouldnt stay awake so I had to skip the story time, the cuddles and put him striaght to bed.

[Mashi]

I do think it sounds to me like he is OT by bedtime -- I know it is hard, but getting him in bed by 6pm instead of 630 really may help -- take him up at 545 and try to have him asleep by 6.   He will probably make up for the missed catnap with some extra night sleep.

[~Jen~]

Hi there, Was just following your post and had to sympathize b/c we are going through the same thing with the blasted CN.  We've made some good progress the past week dropping it and have had some 12hr nights without the CN.  I do find he needs a CN every 3-4 days but then he'll go a few days without.  The days we do CN, he fights so hard not to take it - I have to really APOP (usually rocking) him to sleep.  The first few nights we went without, we had the sceaming 9pm waking as well.  I think Caleb is definitely OT as he is adjusting to life without CN.  We did a little APOP to help DS settle b/c we knew it was the change in routine.  After a few nights, it stopped.  I suppose he is more used to stretching his A time at end of day. 

I actually hate the days we have CN now b/c I know we will get an EW.  And we never get 12hrs at night on those days either.  But we just have to deal b/c those are the days I know he won't make it to bedtime without a total meltdown.  Usually coincides with a crappy afternoon nap day.  Lesser of two evils... EW with catnap or OT meltdown at bedtime without CN 

I definitely agree with the early bedtime during this transition.  It feels way too early but it really does work.  I think they need it as they are so tired from no CN. 
HTH!

[*Jo*]

Ok, i feel better now after reading the last two posts, i will keep going with it and def try for earlier bedtime, good news was there was no more NW last night and he slept till 6.30am (never thought i would be thankful for a 6.30am start) so today I aim for no catnap again. I just wonder why he never makes it to 2 hours, the most he does is 1 jhour 40 mins with his naps

[*Jo*]

first A time was 2 hours 50 mins and hes woken up at 50 mins, should I be doing Pu/Pd in this case? problem being that as soon as he sees me he wont go to sleep, oh and i think he is teething, bright red hot cheeks and drooling like a machine, chewing on anything he can. Ive given him Nurofen already. I cant do Pu/Pd if he is teething can I?

Oh i feel like smacking the wall!

he already has his bottom two teeth, i had a look and it looks like anotehr bottom tooth beside the left one, i thought he was supposed to get the top teeth tnext?

[*Jo*]

right, im gonna scream in a minute, hes been up 3 hours since then, refuses to go to sleep. When i try and soothe him in his cot by putting my hand on his chest and saying "Its time for sleep" he just laughs at me but if i leave he starts crying again. Hes finally gone quiet now.

I cant get him to go 3 hours at the first A time but he goes 3 hours after only a 50min nap!!!!!??? I mean come on! I havent had days like this in months, Im seriously considering just going back to the way things were, I mean theyve got to be better than this surely!

Ok ive given him a paci and hes gone to sleep, he NEVER sleeps with one. Ive given it to him once before when he was teething and it worked and I do think he is teething now, even wiht pain relief though he wasnt gonna go to sleep, ive just checked on him and hes fast asleep with the paci still in.

I know that whenever he sees one though, he wants it, we just keep them out of site for emergencies (like this one), should i just let him have one now that hes old enough to put it in himself etc or should i not even go down that road? would it stop his good sleep even if he is the one to replug??

[Mashi]

A few random things --

First, somethign I thought of this morning, and I smacked myself on the forehead and as we were walking out the door, I didn't have time to pop onto BW to post to you.  When we were dropping the catnap, I didn't just cut it out totally. I can't believe I didn't think to suggest this to you before!  I started cutting it to 20 minutes on days when he had it, then even some days 10 minutes near the end.  It helps him get used to not having it, but getting that wee little snooze in to stretch him to bed. It takes the edge off of the tired but doesn't rest him.  Maybe on days when he does have the CN you can try to cut it short a bit.  Sorry if that seems pointless NOW, I wish I had remembered to suggest it earlier.

With teething, yes, most often the top ones come in next, but there are no hard and fast "rules" where teeth are concerned. Last month DS cut ONE of his two front teeth, then the two on either side of the front teeth, but was still missing his one of his front teeth - looked hilarious.   He could be cutting teeth, or they could just be shifting and causing some discomfort. I have always been one to be liberal with meds, both paracetamol and teething gel, to rule out any possibilities.

Another thing is that A times can be really out the window with OT starting and building up. Something to keep in mind is that he may be getting very OT from the lack of CN and you may have to do shorter CNs, or every so often a full CN or VERY early bed.

With his first A time being 3 hours, he could even be OT from that - if he is teething and is in the process of dropping the CN then he may need to go down at 2h 30/45min...or so.  (My 13 month old still only does 2h30m for his first A time!)

Another thing - lots of things like this are developmental...is he learning to roll? Starting to babble? Getting good at doing mini push ups? Etc Etc....they can ALL throw off A times, nap lengths, and so on.  He is going through a sleep cycle transition and sort of stirs and his little brain says "Wait a minute, I can ROLL!!! Mommy, get me up I want to roll! I want to reach for my toy!!"  And so on. Frustrating, but cute at the same time!

For the paci, well, I'm not the best to answer I don't think.  I never tried to take the paci away - it's a part of who my son is, and we will deal with it when he is older....! 

Not sure if anything there helps, or if more hugs are best. I check in on you every day, wish I could offer more....I know I keep saying this, but things WILL get better, and it will start to turn around soon.  ((HUGS))