Climbing out cot, moved to BBB now taking hours to sleep

[Buntybear]

Sounds like a good idea Ali. You can't force him to nap, he is a good sleeper and I am sure will let you know on the days he does need a nap, will you give him rest time instead?

[teilvnav]

Can you try putting him down earlier? Maybe like 1:00?

[katie80]

(((Hugs))) Ali. I agree with Amy. I know it's not possible on your pg days, but going earlier always helps Claire, even at 3.5 yrs. I also agree that he's a good sleeper, though, so hopefully he'll catch up when he really needs to. FWIW, I don't think he's hating you for trying the nap. He's just really tired, and they have a hard time expressing their emotions and dealing with them properly when they're tired (heck, so do I ). You're safe for him and he's frustrated so he's hitting at you, but also really tired and wanting comfort from you. We went through the exact same thing with Claire, but it did not last long. It's no fun, though, I know that. 

We did continue to offer the nap/rest time every day when she wasn't napping, however she was almost 3 at the time. I'm not sure she would've done very well with that at just over 2.

[*Ali*]

Urgh he was up at 6.44 this morning. Can't remember the last time he was up before 7. Again dh disturbed him. Normally he sleeps through dh's shower but I think he's restless now.

I do normally offer the nap earlier but on play group days (mon-wed) we don't get home til 3. I tried from 1 til 4 on Sunday! I would love to offer rest time but how can I do that when he won't stay in his room without yelling he wants to come out and trashing his toys? I've tried saying he can play quietly but he's not interested. Sometimes he will say he's tired and wants to go back to bed but when it comes to it he won't go. I have even tried snuggling with him on the sofa in front of the tv but he doesn't sit still long enough to fall asleep.

[*jazzberry*]

(((hugs)))) it is a tough phase. The only way I could do it with ds1 was to let him trash his room for a couple of weeks. For us that was the only way he could get the message that he was gonna stay in his room whether he slept or not. I didn't stay with him either, having me in the room would never have worked for us, I would be far too much of a distraction! It really didn't take long for him to get the message.

[barbaraz78]

(Hugs) Ali, it must be really tough! I hope things settle soon... I also think he probably needs now a earlier nap, is there any way you could offer one in the morning?
Anyway, I think that if he really needs it he will crash at a certain point. Not the best thing to expect, as we all would like having more control, but sometime there is not much you can do about it. Just keeping offering and hoping that he will self regulate. He will catch up eventually!

[*Ali*]

No there is no way he would nap in the morning. He hasn't had a nap before 12.30 since he moved to 1 nap at 12mo. And we have to be out of the house by 11.45am so there is no time.

I'm not going to keep offering because it is just resulting in an hour long struggle and never results in a nap. I think I'll have to face it that the only naps he will do from now on will be flukes in the buggy or car.

[*Ali*]

I thought he was going to sleep in the buggy today as his eyes were closing and his head kept dropping so I kept walking past our house since we were just arriving home. But the kid is too smart and sat up like a shot and was asking where we were goi.g and why etc. So I just headed home after 5mins or so.

[*Ali*]

Jazz as much as I would live to just leave him to it he wakes colby if I allow him to get too loud. And I hate to think of all the stuff he would get up to. We only have a small 2 bed so all his toys are in his room pretty much.

[*jazzberry*]

Jazz as much as I would live to just leave him to it he wakes colby if I allow him to get too loud. And I hate to think of all the stuff he would get up to. We only have a small 2 bed so all his toys are in his room pretty much.

I know, I do understand, really.

I was thinking about this today whilst painting ds1's bedroom.... What about giving him a set amount of time in his room at naptime - say 5 minutes to start (or however long he might accept without kicking off...) then going to get him say when a timer goes off. If you could get him to accept this as a normal everyday occurence you could perhaps then increase the time little by little, hopefully he may just realise that he can stay calm cos he knows you are coming shortly.. The idea being that ultimately he might be chilled out enough to fall asleep?

I'm pretty tired from my days exertions so hope that makes sense

[Buntybear]

That sounds like a good idea Jazz - do you mean not act like it is for a nap - ie lights off, normal WD. Create almost like a new WD but for a rest period and not a nap? light bulb moment for me  - will log that in the grey matter for when it comes to it with Olly 

[*Ali*]

Ah bless you for thinking about us.
That is definitely something I could try, thank you.
And sorry if I came across as obstructive in the face of your really helpful suggestions, I feel a little defeated I guess.

[katie80]

But the kid is too smart and sat up like a shot and was asking where we were goi.g and why etc. So I just headed home after 5mins or so.

Little stinker! Claire started doing that in the car at that age... "But Mommy, this is NOT the way to Target."

Great idea from Jazz, I think it's worth a try. 

And...

I think I'll have to face it that the only naps he will do from now on will be flukes in the buggy or car.

... if this is the way it ends up, than that's ok too.  What I've learned with more than one kid is that sometimes we have to let things go for the benefit of the whole family rather than trying in vain to get everything to work for each kid.  Sometimes, we all have to take one for the team. 

(((Hugs))), hon, I get the defeated feeling.  It's no fun.

[*jazzberry*]

That sounds like a good idea Jazz - do you mean not act like it is for a nap - ie lights off, normal WD. Create almost like a new WD but for a rest period and not a nap?

Yes exactly. It's just a thing that happens every day. I still do it with ds2 - leave him with a pile of books and say I'll be back later. Obviously he is older so it's different but if I think he needs it I leave him for an hour and he goes to sleep at least half the time. Hope it works Ali. I'm sure he will nap again eventually, I know it doesn't feel like it at the time though. Hang in there..

[*Ali*]

Wow your almost 5yo still naps sometimes. I'm so jealous lol.
He was asleep by 7pm tonight.