Getting my newborn to nap

[choc]

Ok great. Thanks for all your help!

[choc]

Hi, I'm back and needing some more help please! I have been trying for one nap a day in the moses basket and the only one that it can be really is the last nap of the day before bedtime, after his 4.30pm feed.  But I just can't get him to take the nap. I've tried everything. I'm obviously not reading his cues right and have no idea if I'm putting him down too early or too late. We do a wind down. I have used the 5ss which calm him but he won't actually sleep. I've stayed with him, hand on chest, patting, rocking, holding, swaddling. I just don't know what else to do. If it helps here is what happened today

E 7.30
S 8.30 pram on school run
E 10.30
S 12.30 (put down earlier) in pram in living room as had visitors and couldn't be upstairs settling for hours
E 1.30
S went straight back to sleep in my arms then transfered to pushchair for school run
E 4.30
Put down at 5.20 as was really fussy, crying and seemed a bit 'staring'. Didn't see a yawn though.

Was maybe UT then? Any advice on what to do?

[lily_layne]

Can you post the end time of each nap? I am assuming the naps are lasting until he eats next but I want to be sure before I give advice.

[choc]

Yes the naps do last til the next feed.

[lily_layne]

So aside from being awake for to eat, he slept from 12:30-4:30? If that's the case then he definitely wasn't tired at 5:20. Babies are often fussy at the "witching hour" (5/6 pm - right when we're busiest with other LOs and getting supper ready ) so I think that may be the source of the crying. I would give at least 1h30 A time after an afternoon like that unless he is clearly drowsy and yawning. He may even do more - some babies are quite alert in the early evening.

[choc]

Ah OK. I think I am so worried about OT that's why I am putting him down so early. So much you read says 3 and 4 week olds are only awake long enough for feed and nappy change so I didn't know he might be OK to stay awake that long! Yesterday I had to resettle many many times during all his naps for the first time ever. Do you think this might be to do with being  UT as well? He was also awake for about 3 hours in the night last night, which is also a first for him. Could that also be UT?!

[lily_layne]

I think I am so worried about OT that's why I am putting him down so early. So much you read says 3 and 4 week olds are only awake long enough for feed and nappy change so I didn't know he might be OK to stay awake that long!

I was the same with DD. Some babies are just more alert. Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child has some good stuff on sleep (and some absolutely horrid stuff on CIO) and it talks about the window being anywhere from 1-2hrs and just following cues for the first 3-4 months. It might be worth a read (please, please ignore the CIO stuff) if you need some reassurance.

Honestly, sleep went so much better with DS when I gave up worrying about A times and just went with cues. Some As were long and some were short. I also didn't wake him from naps very often. DH always said I "messed with" DD too much (waking her, trying to get her to sleep before she was tired, etc) and I didn't agree at the time but I think he's right. It would have been easier to let her lead a bit more when she was  a newborn.

The resettling could be UT but it could also be developmental. How old is he know? I think he's approaching a big mental leap that can disrupt sleep.

[choc]

On Sunday he will be 4 weeks.

The thing is I have been watching his cues. I go up for the wind down  on the first yawn. He does actually yawn not long after he wakes up but I have learnt to ignore that and wait for the yawn that is roughly around an hour ish of A time. Maybe that yawn is not reliable either? I just got him to drop off in his basket so I'm happy with that but it took 45.mins. Earlier today it took one hour, but again he fell asleep in the basket which is good.

[lily_layne]

That's great that he's sleeping in his basket. It sounds like the yawns may be unreliable. What about waiting about 10-15 minutes after a yawn to see if that helps?

There is a huge developmental leap around 4 weeks which can really impact sleep.

[choc]

Ok, do you mean wait 10 to 15 mins to see if he yawns again or to start wind down 10 to 15 mins after he yawns?

[choc]

Well I thought I had nailed it today. I didn't take him up on the first yawn, I waited 10 more minutes and had 2 more yawns in that time so we went up and he was asleep within 15 mins! I was so happy! But then he woke at 30mins. I assume OT as I took longer to put him down, but what doesn't make sense is that usually it takes me an hour to get him to sleep after roughly 1 hour A time, so that adds up to 2 hours awake and he hasn't woken at 30 mins then?! Anyway I had to keep trying to resettle him for 40 mins then got him up. . This has never been a problem before, getting him to sleep was the problem  but never keeping him asleep! He usually does 2 hour naps at  least.  I'm not sure what to do for the next one now.

[lily_layne]

My DD did lots of 20-30 minutes naps around 4 weeks. It's often developmental.

[choc]

Ah OK, so not necessarily OT?

[lily_layne]

They may not be OT. It can be tough to tell with spirited babies. Have you heard of the Wonder Weeks? There's a good website and an app that explain what wonder weeks are (huge developmental leaps), when they happen and how they impact sleep. At 4 weeks. babies really start waking up to the world and some would rather look around then sleep (and then end up OT and OS after the short naps - but things will get back on track).

[choc]

I realise I sound like such a moaner but I really feel like I can't do this. 2 weeks ago he would take ages to go to sleep in his basket if at all, but once asleep would sleep for hours. at night he would go straight back to sleep after his feed. Now he takesnearly 2 hhours to get to sleep for a 30 min nap that I can't resettle and stays awake all night. I don't know what to do. Sometimes I think I'll give up but he won't sleep on me or in swing either so I wouldn't know what to do with him. I need him tosstart self soothing or something. I have no plan though.