4 month sleep regression?

[Ulrica83]

Hi everyone,

My LO is now 4 months and 10 days old. On the same day he turned 4 months his sleeping habits dramatically changed (and we don't know how to fix them). He used to go down really well, napped for 1,5-2 hours with just some help around the 45 min mark. Now it's difficult to make him nap more than 45 minutes and he seems constantly OT and unhappy. During the nights he wakes up frequently, but goes back to sleep after we reswaddle/put paci back/shh pat. What can we do to get our rested, happy baby back?

I would really appreciate your advice!

[Lindsay27]

Hello!  Can you post your day in EAS format so we can take a look at what might be happening.  45min naps can be either a transition issue (between sleep cycles) or can also be UT (undertired) so it could be that you need a push in A times.

Are you feeding at night at all?  There is a pretty big growth spurt at 4 months as well so the more frequent wake ups could be hunger, or could be a result of being OT if naps are short all day.

We are right there with you in the 4 month fun!

[Ulrica83]

Thank you for your quick reply!

Here's what it's been like for the past three days:

W 7.00
E 7.15 (expressed milk + formula for every feed)
A 7.30
S 8.30-10.00 (this is the best nap, goes down OK, needs shh/pat at 45 min mark, sleeps for another 30-45 min, wakes happy)

E 10.15
A 10.30
S 11.45-12.30 (wakes up cranky, yawning, not wanting to eat. I try to resettle with shh/pat for 15 minutes, no success.)
A 12.30-1.30

E 1.30
A 1.45
S 2.15-3.00 (super tired when put down, I try to keep him up longer, but he can't make it since the nap before was so short)
A 3.00-4.15
S 4.15-5.00 (same as above)

E 5.15
A 5.30
S 6.30 (used to be 7 or 7.30 pm, but he is tired by 6 pm, so we start our BT routine then)

DF 11 pm
NW 2.30 am (resettle with shh/pat, reswaddle, paci)
BF 4 am (no formula here)
EW 6 am (resettle same as above)

He used to wake every hour during the night at 3 months, wanting to eat. My milk supply wasn't enough, he stopped gaining weight - so we started adding formula and everything improved. The nights are so much better, but the days are all off!

He manages fine with 4 hour intervals for feeding during the day. His first A time of the day is always the shortest. I tried pushing his A time towards 2 hours, but I don't think he's ready, a specially not with the short naps - or should I push them?

He has started rolling over, so we are now worrying about the swaddle. Should we remove the swaddle? The paci? Oh dear, I can't even think about it..

[Lindsay27]

I think a large part of the short naps are the A times, at 4 months you should be nearing 2hrs.  My DD is only a few days younger and we are doing around 1.50-2hrs most days.  Sometimes it can seems like they are tired earlier but they just need a change in activity.  I would try extending to at least 1.45 and see what happens.  I think you are in a UT/OT loop which means under tired for the first/second nap which result in a short nap, so then overtired for the remainder.

I hear you in the swaddle, we just started weaning today and it has been disastrous, sigh.

As for the NW have you tried feeding at the 2:30 one? I know my DD used to sleep through to 3/4am but she is now waking at around 1am for a feed and she is starving (we don't DF).  I am just wondering if you feed at 2:30 if it will eliminate your 4am NW.

[Ulrica83]

Oh, excellent! Once again, thank you.

I tried pushing the A times today. First and second A time was 1,75 hrs and then 2 hrs. He slept 1,5 hours for the first nap! Didn't need any help/shh-pat at all.

This past night was horrible, he woke up at 1 am, needed shh/pat to fall asleep. Woke again at 3 am, needed to breast feed (hungry!). After that he woke every 20 minutes until 5.45 am.. Phew!

So today:

W 5.45 (earliest EVER. Had been shh/patting since 3.15 am, so both him and I were tired of it)
E 6.30
A 7.00
S 7.30-9.00 (woke happy)

E 9.30
A 9.45
S 10.45-11.45 (woke happy)

E 12.45
A 1.00
S 1.45-2.15 awake 30 min, then asleep 2.45-3.30 (woke almost happy..)

E 4.00
A 4.15

And here we are.. The E times are a bit off r/t the sleep issues. Now I don't know whether to put him to bed really early, at 5.30 pm? Or do I give him a cat nap at 5.30-6 and then BT 7/7.30 pm?

He has been fighting the last (fourth nap), so we were thinking of dropping it. But then this regression came and we lost track..

Any recommendations?

[Lindsay27]

Well at least the naps have improved! Nights...we are in the same boat honestly and I'm calling it the 4 month sleep regression, but as I said my DD is taking her NF a lot earlier so just watch for hunger earlier in the night

We are also having an awkward time in the evening with A times.  I think it depends on your LO, my DD can handle OT fairly well so we usually end up with a long A before bed, or if the weather is nice we go for a walk and she might take a 15 minute CN just to get her through to BT.

[Ulrica83]

You are amazing! So quick as well.

We chose to give LO a cat nap now at 5.30 pm, he fell asleep without any fuss in the stroller - we'll give him 30 minutes there. The naps today has been really good! Not as good as when he was 3 months old, but a lot better than yesterday.

Our little guy is not too good on handling OT. The first and last A times of the day are always a bit shorter than the rest - or else he gets really upset. So, we normally take around 30-45 minutes of winding down before he falls asleep at BT, and 5-10 minutes before naps, to avoid OT - and it almost always works. He rarely cries.

I tried feeding DS at 3 am last night, but he was still waking frequently after that (not wanting to eat). We were trying to push his 4 am NF forward until it coincides with breakfast, i.e., the 7 am feed. Is that a correct way of eliminating NF:s? Or should I decrease the amount of time I breast feed until it's down to zero? If I remember correctly, that's how Tracy recommends to eliminate DF when solids are firmly established?

Maybe you have saved us from the 4 month sleep regression? I'm not going to count my chickens just yet.. But you've got my hopes up. We can get through this!

[Lindsay27]

I would maybe just hold off on any major moved to eliminate NFs right now.  It is perfectly normal for a 4 month old to need multiple feeds in the night, especially during growth spurts (4 months, 6 months).  My DD went from 1 NF back to 2 over the last few weeks and my DS didn't drop them until he was 8 months old. 

If he doesn't handle OT well then best to offer a CN if you can, it sounds like that worked well for you?

[Ulrica83]

Ah, OK, then we'll wait a bit longer before eliminating NF!

DS got his first cold yesterday: coughing and feverish - and also super tired. Napped 2 hrs in the morning, mid day and afternoon. Didn't sleep too well during the night, NF at 9.30, 1.00 and 3.00.. He even cried a bit (!), we figured maybe he had some pain in his ear/throat? Gave him some Paracetamol and it calmed down.

Today we're trying to push his A times still. He manages 1,75 hrs in the morning quite OK now. Aimed for 2 hrs second A time, but he was really tired and almost cried after 1 hr 50 min, so I sent DH for a walk with LO in the stroller - he fell asleep within a minute (LO, not DH).

We will keep extending A times towards 2 hrs, it seems like LO is ready for that now - which he wasn't a couple of weeks ago. And hopefully that will shed some light over this 4 month sleep regression.

How are things working out for you and DD? Would you mind sharing the routine you're using for her right now? It would be interesting to see how you do it!

[Lindsay27]

If he doesn't make it to 2hrs that's okay, we sometimes bounce anywhere from 1.45-2hrs and I just try to watch her cues.  Also, if he's feeling a little unwell A times can really decrease.

Our routine has been a bit wonky lately because my DD needs to go usually 4hrs between feeds, so sometimes if she has a later NF she doesn't want to eat when she wakes up, so we sometimes end up with a A-E-A-S routine (like today).  Today was:

NF 4am
WU 6:45am

A 6:45 - 8am
E 8am
A
S 8:45am - 10:30am (woke after 45mins and I resettled her)

A 10:30am
E 11:45am
S 12:30 - 1:50

Then we went to friends so the day went wonky

A 1:50
E 3:45
A
S 4:45 - 5:15 (clearly OT!)

A 5:15
E 6:45pm
S 7pm

[Ulrica83]

Same here! 4 hrs between feedings is no problem, but A times and sometimes naps are shorter than 2 hrs. Good to know that AEAS-routines also work.

LO is now well and happy, but I have a fever and not feeling to awesome. We'll stay in today and practice to take all naps in the crib (normally we take one of the naps during a 2 hr stroller walk). Wish me luck!

[Lindsay27]

Try to get some rest for yourself if you are feeling unwell!

[Ulrica83]

Thank you, I'm starting to feel better (after spending almost three days in bed sleeping or in the sofa playing with/feeding LO).

Just one more question:

If LO wakes up from the last nap around 4 pm - do I give him a cat nap at 5.30-6 and BT at 7-7.30? Or do I move BT to 6 pm? What would you do?

[Lindsay27]

It really depends, I kind of play it by ear.  My DD can handle OT fairly well and she generally likes an earlier BT anyway, so I would opt for a long A before bed and maybe a 6:30 BT.  If I don't do that I would maybe take her for a walk after dinner and hope for a 15-20min CN in the stroller to get her through to a 7pm BT.  She is pretty well in bed by 7pm at the latest no matter what, she is not a party animal lol

[Ulrica83]

I'm back again.. We have tried putting LO to bed earlier, around 6.30 and it has been working fine. He now manages 3 naps a day (1,75+2+0,75 hrs). The A times are also working fine.

BUT.. The past two nights have been awful. He sleeps from 6.30-10 pm, wakes and feeds. Then he wakes every 20-30 minutes almost all night long! It's exhausting, both for us and for him, the poor little thing. He's not hungry, won't take bottle or breast until around 4 am.

What's going on? What are we doing wrong?

The one thing that I can think of is that he's starting to Houdini his way out of the swaddle and so we leave the left arm out (we have never swaddled his legs). So now he rubs his face and accidentally pulls the paci out. We want to wean the swaddle since he's rolling over easily. Also, maybe we should wean from the paci since he wakes up when it falls out? Is this how the nights are going to be now??

Any help is SO appreciated!