He freaks out at bedtime! HELP!

[ashersmom]

HELP!  My spirited 15 week old DS FREAKS OUT crying when we try to put him to bed!  He's on 3 hour EASY and we have the same wind down routine with him every day and night...The second we swaddle him he SCREAMS for atleast 1/2 hour before he just passes out...and then wakes again in either 10 or 45.  He does this no matter how low key we keep the evening.  We used to give him the pacifier for this, but he began waking in the night for it.  So about 1 week ago we stopped the pacifier--he did great the first couple of nights...but now he's freaking out again AND waking a lot in the night!  When he had the pacifier we could put him in the crib drowsy, but awake and he'd go to sleep.  We thought we would slowly try and put him down in his crib and shush/pat--but it NEVER works (we have not attempted the full PU/PD yet)  Anyone had the same experience?  This is SO upsetting.  ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

Thanks!
Beth

[Caroline-Charlies Mummy]

Hello Beth, I noticed no-one's replied to you, so I wanted to bump your post up.
I don't know if I can be much help, b/c my lo does the same thing! Have you tried pu/pd? Also, we notice that he's not so bad if he goes to bed just that little bit earlier. Could your lo be overtired? How long is it btn the last nap and bedtime?

Just a thought.

Caroline

[GG]

I'm with Caroline... how long does your ds stay awake before bedtime?  You may be missing his sleepy cues.

Also, since he's almost 4 mo, how about swaddling only 1 arm or only his torso?  See if that makes a difference.  My DS hated being swaddled, too, but it really calmed him down (up to a point).

It sounds like you were using the paci properly... using it just to let him get drowsy.  But if he was waking for it at night, it's best to just get rid of it altogether, as you did.  Keep in mind that there will be regression.  I noticed that you posted this 1 week ago.  Have things gotten better?

[ashersmom]

Hi Caroline and Georgia-
Thanks for replying!  I check this everyday to see if anyone replies...and finally someone has!!  Things have gotten better in that he doesn't wake at night anymore...only once to feed...hurray!!  But he still cries A LOT when we put him down for the night....but not for naps...my DH and I were just discussing....is DS old enough to understand that this is the night sleep where he will be down for a long time??

We have begun leaving out one arm when swaddling because just in the last week DS has found his fingers...usually too upset to suck them at night, though.

Thanks again for your replies!
Beth

[Jayri]

Hi there, have you tried pat/shh instead of pu/pd.
It may be helpful to try that to get your lo used to the idea of independant sleep, and then when he is older try pu/pd.
My dd is about 22weeks, and we started her on pat/shh.
I would swaddle her, hold her in my arms facing me, she had a hand out as she likes to suck her fingers. I would do pay/shh until she became drowzy enough to not really notice I had put her down. She was still awake, but she was almost gone IYKWIM.
Good luck hun, keep us posted it, and ask more questions if you need to.

[butterfly524]

today was the first time my lo went down without me holding her and i did everything by the book.  the key for me was to put her down BEFORE she was too tired, she actually didnt seem tired at all and i doubted it was going to work but i was sooo tired of holding her for an hour till she went to sleep i tried it and it worked!

rebecca
dd juliet rose
8.12.05

[ashersmom]

Hi Naomi--

We have tried Pat/Shh.  It only works if he's just woken up and we catch him right away to put him back to sleep.  I suppose we should give PU/PD a try!

Thanks for your support!

Beth

[ashersmom]

Hi Rebecca-

Congratulations on getting your lo down without any crying!  How long did it take for you to get to this point??

Thanks for replying!   I really appreciate it!

Beth