Terrible Night Issues - Desperate

[BBD]

Hi we are really struggling @ night with multiple wakings.

S is 7months old, we started weaning a month ago and she does very well. She is completley bf.


We ditched they dummy about 2wks ago due to multiple wakes from naps and night sleeps (up to 10+ a night)

Since then naps are pretty perfect 2x2hr naps in her cot falls asleep on her own - great.

Night times are another matter. She tends to jolt awake after 45mins (although not always) sometimes I can get her back down either by leaving her for a few minutes, rubbing her back or if all else fails bf'ing her again. Sometimes though we miss the boat and she is awake for another 2/3hrs before giving into sleep.

Average good day

A 6.30/7am
E 7.30am bf
E 8.30am solids
E 9.30an bf
S 10-12
E 12/12.30 bf and solids
S 2-4 ish (give or take 30mins)
E 4 bf
E 4.30 solids
E 6.30 bf
S quite often falls a sleep @ the breast and then bed

She then sometimes wakes every hour or so (not always though) We also have two tricky times in the night 2am ish and 5am ish last night I bf her @ both.

Any ideas were exhausted, thanks

[mum101]

Hi BBD, I'm sure you will get some great advice from many parents here!

One suggestion I'd have is for her not to fall asleep while breast feeding at night (perhaps you might need to make her  second nap later in the day or get her to bed at night a little earlier) so that she goes to bed awake.  I would guess she wakes up and wonders where the breast has gone as it's the last thing she was doing and it soothed her to sleep.

This might be so too, as you say she sometimes bf at night.  Theoretically she could be getting enough milk/food during the day and doesn't need night-time food, but likes the comfort. 

To nip it in the bud you might need to get some tips on stopping bf at night (unless she is unwell or wakes up stressed after a scary dream or such). 

We had some rough times with our DD waking up at night and found that sticking to our guns and the plan we had set (which didn't involve rocking to sleep or milk etc).  She learnt soon enough that we'll be there for her, but she also learnt how to put herself and resettle on her own, which is invaluable to her also.  Tough work though 

Some things we did were to sit by her cot and sing a song while rubbing her back. Then after some time, we would gradually reduce down the time we pat/shhd or sang a song.  We would never revert back to rocking/feeding/cuddling, as you go backwards because they know they can get you to do it. 

You may find too that she will get a better night's sleep when she wakes and settles herself independently (as well as YOU!!) and improve her sleep as a result. 


Hope it gets better for you soon!  char

[midnightspace]

Hi
firstly *Big Hugs*
Can I ask a question what does she sleep in? sleeping bag ? covers?  Is there any external factor that could wake her ? lights?

Have you thought about doing a dream feed?

Our little girl goes 4 hours between b/f  dont know if that makes a diffrence?

What is she eating? could this be upsetting her?

Sorry cant be more helpful ...

hope you solve the prob . x

[Peek-a-boo]

If I'm reading your routine correctly, you are looking for 12 hours of night sleep and 4 hours of day sleep, for a total of 16 hours?  I think that you are expecting too much sleep.  I depends on the baby, but by 7 months my little guy only needed about 13 hours--he seems to need less sleep than others around here.  It seems like 14, 15 hours at the most for this age would be a reasonable expection.  

If this is the source of the problem and DD keeps waking because she just isn't tired enough to sleep really soundly for long chunks at night, you may need to reduce her day time napping and increase her A time.  This may mean waking her up after just 1.5 hours from one of her naps (probably the am nap), or stretching the time between each sleep so that bed time gradually moves a bit later.  

Bethany

[BBD]

Thanks for all your replies. She was having a lot less day sleeps before we got rid of the dummy and still had bad night sleep but I guess that is prop a dependency.

I should of mentioned that she is still in our room, which is fairly light. We haven't really got anywhere else to put apart from in with her brother (20 months) but don't want to do that until she is a relible sleeper.

She sleeps in a gorbag on her tummy. The end is tucked under the matress so she can't turn over in the night. I've given her a lovey but she hasn't formed an attachtment to it yet.

She had 2hrs this morning and 1hr this afternoon and then went down awake @ 7pm and self settled within minutes, so am praying we have a better night.

I struggle with how long to keep her awake in the day as I don't want her to get over tired. What A times a realistic?

Thanks again x

[Peek-a-boo]

It's important to watch her cues.  Also, if you decide to extend A time, only stretch it by 5-10 minutes every couple of days, giving her time to adjust.  Hmmmm, at 7 month, I think my DS was going 2.5-3 hours between sleeps.  At this age it really starts to vary, so you have to figure out what works for your LO.  Also, A time won't necessarily be the same all throughout the day.  It is common for the A time before first nap to be the shortest and the A time before bed to be the longest--it shouldn't be waaaay longer, but I think many LOs can handle an extra 1/2 hour or so of A time before bed. 

What happens if you untuck the grobag and allow her to roll? 

Bethany

[BBD]

She rolls on to her back and sither bangs herself into the cot sides or keep flailing her arms around.

Last night she slept from 7pm-4.45am with out a peep. I then fed her and she slept again til 7am.

So I'm going to aim for the same amount of sleep time today and put her down awake again this evening.

[Peek-a-boo]

I'm glad last night was better.    It may just be taking her a bit to adjust to no dummy.  Keep being consistent.  It really helps also to keep a record of when she is awake and sleeps each day so that you can see trends of what works and what doesn't.

Bethany

[BBD]

Terrible nigh she woke @ 10pm and didn't go back to sleep for over an hour. She then woke every 1.5/2hrs through the night and we are now up after her waking @ 4.30am, help

[Peek-a-boo]

I'm so sorry things are rough for your right now.  Could you post your nap routine from yesterday?  When she's awake in the night--especially that very first waking--how does she act?  Happy and ready to get up and play if you'd let her?  Or sleepy and tired but just can't seem to settle?

I'm guessing something with your routine needs tweaking--it sounds like she's either overly tired or not tired enough and I'm not sure which it is!  It is really important to be as consistent as possible--no dummy, no nursing to sleep.  How are you handling it when she wakes and won't go back to sleep?  Are you using pu/pd? 

[momofclaire]

I agree with PP.  Feeding her to sleep at night is probably not doing anything for the night waking.  Are there any developmental things going on?  A new skill can really do a number on sleep.

[stheo]

i agree with the feeding to sleep... Ainslee used to fall asleep on the bottle and would wake up 45 mins after going to sleep... we stopped feeding her to sleep and she stopped waking at the 45 min mark... still happen every once in a while but not every night...

[BBD]

Its gone from bad to worse I don't know if I'm comming or going. She's been up @ 4/5am for the lst 3days and today has only two 45min naps.

I don't know where to start we are so tired I can't think,

[momofclaire]

Have you worked on the feeding to sleep?  Is she totally done with the paci?

[BBD]

Right. She is no longer fed to sleep. I've removed her dummy for all day time sleeps which seem to be back on track today 1.5hrs this morning and is 1hr into her pm nap.

Last night she woke @ 11pm and cried until I fed her @ 12am. I then gave her the dummy when she woke every 2/2.5hrs through the night and fed her @ 7am.

I'm thinking of giving her a d/f and then dummy for any night wakings or is that bad?