Twins- habitual night waking

[katie80]

(((Hugs))). So now we need to decide if they're waking due do developmental stuff, teething, or needing less daytime sleep.  What do you think?

[Beweakley]

Oh geez, I don't know anymore.  Everett's got a little tooth barely coming up, and he has taken longer to settle at BT, so I think his issue is teething and a little OT at bedtime.  I just don't know what to do with Elijah anymore.  His NWs have been going on so long and I don't know what's perpetuating them.  I don't think they can handle less daytime sleep; they barely get to 3.5 A time without allying apart.  I think his started as just habit from being fed in the MOTN, but has been complicated by a little teething and developmental stuff at different times.  This morning he was kneeling in his crib-that's the first time he's ever done that.  He's pulling up and standing a lot during the day so I think it could be that more than teething since he doesn't appear to be in any kind of pain.  And I've complicated things over the months by responding inconsistently in the MOTN. 


Let me describe what he does in the MOTN.... It starts with just stirring like he needs to change positions.  And he'll do that and shuffle around a little more and finally progress to some kicking and fussing. Then he'll start talking (I guess to see if anyone answers) and he'll kick around.  After he's done this a while (about a half hour- depending on how awake he is/ also depends on how quick i respond--the quicker i go in the less he wakes) then he'll start to get in his little comfy spot and quiet down like he's nodding off.  That's when the crying and fussing really starts because he's frustrated that he can't get back to sleep.  And he'll fuss and then get quiet. He might even settle down for five minutes or so and I'll think he's asleep or it's over and then he'll let out a cry and start kicking or moving again.  That will continue for another half hour to forty five minutes.  When he's worn out then he'll go back to sleep. I can shush/pat til the cows come home, but he won't drift off until he's ready.  I basically go in for crowd control so that I can keep Everett from waking and making the situation worse.  I stand and shush or every now and then roll him back over or try to move him so that he'll settle down.  When he starts to get frustrated then I'll comfort as needed and I'm usually standing near the crib or sitting on the floor when he finally falls asleep. 

I'll try a different schedule if you think that will help. Hecko, I'll do W2S every hour if that will help, because  I really don't know what else to try anymore. 

[katie80]

Hmm, I don't really know either. . They sure have had a cut in day time sleep over the past few weeks, so it would be hard to think that they are still UT, but it is a possibility.  I think what they're doing right now is a pretty average routine for 10mo, but it can really vary depending on the LO.

The way you describe the NW sounds like it is still either developmental or UT to me (could be discomfort, but that's hard to say if he's not struggling during the day; although, I'm sure if Everett's getting a tooth through, Elijah probably won't be too far behind).  He sure is doing lots of developmental stuff, so I guess we'll go with that and keep working through it.  I would try really hard not to intervene though if he's not crying for you.  I know you don't want Everett to wake and I don't either, but sometimes our intervention in getting things done quicker ends up biting us in the bum later, because they become dependent on it.  My DS woke often at night at this age, and all it took was for me to go in, lie him down, and say my sleepy phrase and he'd be back asleep.  But, he didn't stop waking.  So, finally I made him lie down on his own for a few nights and he finally stopped waking.  Turns out my little cuddle and put down had become a sort of prop.