Need to night wean my 1 year old

[Fiver]

If I were you, I'd try sending in DH to resettle her in the night so there's no temptation for you to feed and she more than likely realises he can't help her out there

[*Ali*]

Yes it is sad but like you I needed my sleep and my boys did too. I weaned the last NF from DS1 at 12.5mo and from DS2 at 15mo and I was so glad I did honestly. After a week or two they didn't even seem to remember NFs.

[fellianne]

So tonight I will get rid of the 10ish feed.  I have not fed her at night other than that and she still continues to wake a lot.  After the first waking it's nearly every hour.  Do you think it's cause she wants to nurse?  It doesn't seem to be pain related right now.  Also, she has been REALLY clingly lately.  And wanting to nurse all the time during the day.  She tries to pull down my shirt - even if I've nursed her less than an hour before.  I try to go 4 hours or so between nursing.  Do you think all this is because she isn't nursing at night?  And should I just nurse her all the time during the day now?

[fellianne]

Also, I'm confused about her naps, too.  I try to keep her A time 4.15 to 4.45 in the AM.  She gets really fussy in the AM.  Some days she will sleep 3 hours without waking up!  Other days she will wake every 45 minutes and need me to resettle. Sometimes she'll sleep a second 45, sometimes a third, and sometimes only the first 45 minutes.  I don't understand.  Do you think it's related to not feeding during the night?  I don't resettle for naps with nursing.  I try to keep her in her bed and pat her back, but I'll usually have to pick her up and then she'll relax back to sleep.  It can be the exact same schedule for days in a row, but the nap is still crazy.  And the nights are never the same, either.   Do you think it's feeding related?

[*Ali*]

When I hear a LO is waking every sleep cycle or every few sleep cycles at night and naps there are two things that spring to my mind immediately. Discomfort and prop. It sounds like she is coming into lighter sleep at certain points in her sleep and she is either disturbed because she is in pain or discomfort from reflux or teething (or illness) or she is looking for mum because she has got used to mum being there when she falls asleep and she isn't in a mind to just roll over and put herself back to sleep. So if you are sure she is pain-free from the reflux and she isn't teething then it is probably a self-settling issue. So she has got used to you being there patting or feeding or just having a hand on her or whatever and when she stirs she is looking for you to do that again to get her back off.

If this is the case then getting her back to independent sleep for all sleeps will go a long way to getting her comfortable to be alone in bed and just resettle herself.

[fellianne]

Thank you so much!  It's been a hard year because of all the reflux pain.  I have definitely become a prop.  But I am pretty sure that at this moment (sometimes it changes quickly) she is pain free.  When she does start to teethe again or if the reflux flairs again, do I nurse her?

Last night went WAY better than I expected!  She woke at 7:45, 9:30, 9:50, 11:00 and then not again until 4AM!!!!  Then again at 5:52AM.  It has been at least 8 months since she has slept for 5 hours straight.  I didn't nurse her at all.  DH settled her the first 3 times and I did from 11:00 on.  Do you think it was a fluke or do you think we are on the right track?

[Fiver]

Also, she has been REALLY clingly lately.

Also sounds like there might be a bit of separation anxiety creeping in there.  Are you able to distract her during the day to do something else if she asks to feed?

When she does start to teethe again or if the reflux flairs again, do I nurse her?

I think I would try to find some other source of relief/comfort for her at those times.

[fellianne]

Okay, thank you.  I'll try to play with her when she tries to nurse.  And what do I do about separation anxiety? 

And that night was a fluke because last night was AWFUL!!!!  She woke 6 times from 1-3 and then stayed up from 3-3:57.  Then woke again at 4:48 and I had to have my husband take care of her until morning.  I think maybe something was hurting?  I don't see teeth, but gave her Tylenol and also some tummy drops we use that are supposed to help with reflux pain.  But it was a rough night.  I'm trying to rule out food intolerances.  I didn't nurse her at all when she woke. 

[Fiver]

Tips for seperation anxiety