6mo new to EASY

[Batool huzaifa]

Because i think he is overtired till his bedtime comes..and the frst 2 naps are gettting earlier and earlier day by day bcoz he is waking up early in the morning..and it gets realy hard to stay him awake for more than 2.5 hours.. but i will still try 2:75 hours..i just hope he doesnt becum overtired and his horribl 45 mins naps dont hit me back..i wish the nights are also longer and with less awakenings..2 are fine..but not more than that..today i made him have the catnap and he took 45 mins to go to sleep at bedtime...horrifying it was!!thanksss bec for the link:))

[becj86]

I think the main issue is that he's not getting a proper restorative nap after that first A time, so increasing should help.  FX for you

[Batool huzaifa]

Tried 2.75 hours...frst nap was 50 mins..and for the second nap he went to sleep within 5 mins but then he woke up aftrr 15 mins..i went to check so found a dirty diaper..after cleaning and chnging him he never went back to sleep...tried twice each for half an hour..finaly in my third attempt he went to sleep at 5 p.m and woke up after 25 mins...and now its 9 p.m ..its already been an hour i have put him in his bed but he is still wide awake playing

[Batool huzaifa]

For some reason he needs me in the room..i lie beside him pretending to sleep then sometimes he sleeps after making lots of efforts to wake me up ..other times he cries n cries till i wake up n settles him..besides he finds 1 or the other activity in his bed to indulge in...like pulling bedsheet..playing with the pillow which stimulates him.. n if i pat him or he sees me awake he also becomes wide awake.. beacause of this inconsistency his wake up tomes have strted varying too.. should i let him sleep or wake him up at his scheduled time??

[Batool huzaifa]

Plus he has been very clingy this week...i suppose its because i am leaving him to cry in his bed...he is not even ready to play without me...the moment i leave him he strts crying

[Batool huzaifa]

Agaij tried 2 hrs 45 mons in the morning..he woke up in 55 mins..n he seems so so tired...

[becj86]

If you don't increase his A time so he is tired enough to take a long nap, he will get overtired, just as you are noticing. The whole point of EASY is that baby's life is predictable. When you change things up, he can't self-regulate and take the sleep he needs when he's given the opportunity. He doesn't have the capacity to decide to sleep in if he's kept up an extra 3 hr in the evening here and there.

2hr45 is to short for him, we've already established that and you're just reinforcing that in my mind by seeing these short naps of 50-55 min after 2:45.

Please, please don't leave him in his cot to cry - I'm sure you're aware BW is totally against any form of controlled crying or cry it out - if baby cries for you, he needs you. Its actually really normal for a baby to need you, when he needs you, its important to respond to reinforce his trust in you - that's what keeps him feeling secure and safe which allows him to sleep and grow.

He must be nearly 7 months old by now, average A time would be around 3:15, so its definitely worth increasing to see how he goes. I know it feels wrong to increase his awake time when he's tired but its what has to be done when he's not awake long enough to take a long restorative nap.

[Batool huzaifa]

Yeah i would definitely give it a try tomorrow...unless we have to go out ...this is also a v big prob..we have to go out atleast on weekends but since he doesnt sleep outside all his schedule becomes upside down which is why i want his bedtime to be late normally so he doesnt get oveetired wem we are out on weekends..anyways thts secondary..first i realy need to work on his naps...will try tom and keep u updated...thanks bec for all ur support n advice

[Batool huzaifa]

Last night he slept at 11 coz we were out..yestrday he was up from 3 p.m till 8:30 p.m wen he finally took a nap of 25 mins..though he slept at 11 he woke up today at 8:a.m.. woke up multiple times in the night for bf... i put him to bed for his frst nap at 11:15 a.m.. he dint sleep but cried lots n lots...finaly i rocked him n slept in my arms around 11:30.. woke up at 12...i tried to make him sleep again till 12..he dint sleep and there was unconsolable crying..he dint stop crying even in my arms..at 1.00 i strted talking to him..he stopped crying..we cuddled and talked in the same dark room till 1:40.. then i took him out...

[Batool huzaifa]

Again made him sleep at 3:05.. he woke up at 3:35

[becj86]

Ok, so you're regularly out at night til 11pm and in a place LO can't sleep? Is there somewhere at this place that you can set up a cot or pram that's quiet and dark so he can sleep? Is it the same place every time?

It sounds like he's (understandably) really overtired from such a late night and short interrupted night sleep.

What is your plan when he is going to school and has to be there at 8/9am? He will have to be in bed earlier than 11 then (I know its a long way off but if you shift your day so he's regularly going to bed at 11pm and getting up for the day around 10 or 11am, things could well be very tricky when he's older).

[Lindsay27]

Yeah i would definitely give it a try tomorrow...unless we have to go out ...this is also a v big prob..we have to go out atleast on weekends but since he doesnt sleep outside all his schedule becomes upside down which is why i want his bedtime to be late normally so he doesnt get oveetired wem we are out on weekends..anyways thts secondary..first i realy need to work on his naps...will try tom and keep u updated...thanks bec for all ur support n advice

I don't think the fact that you are out on weekends is secondary, I think it is a primary reason why you can't get a routine sorted.  The idea behind a routine is consistency, and if every weekend he is out/up until 11pm then it is absolutely going to take 2-3 days for him to recover, at which point you are near the weekend again.  I think if you are going to be out late every weekend then you really need to lose any idea of sleep training or having a regular routine. You can't expect your LO to live the life you do, he is a baby, you are not.  If I want to go out my DH stays home, if my DH wants to go out, I stay home...if we both want to go out, we get a babysitter.  You don't "have" to go out on weekends, you have to put the needs of your LO before your own.

It sounds like he's (understandably) really overtired from such a late night and short interrupted night sleep.

^^Bec is absolutely correct, it is simply a case of being chronically overtired.

[Batool huzaifa]

I know he is chronically overtired but how to end it? We are new in singapore and usually dont go out because of lo but there are times wen we have to go..like yesterday we had office dinner at my husband s company... besides it takes a loy of time in travelling since we have to use mrt and buses to commute... i dont go to the same place..its different everytime ..like a mall or so.. and its always crowded..its impossible to find a quiet dark place..but i watch other childrem fast asleep in their stroller..not even least bothered wats going on  around...but my lo wide awake...if i go out i ll miss euther his nap or his bedtime...its imposible not to miss either of them.. i know i not being consistent but i had thought once he is on his routine then he ll follow it even if m nt at hme..i gave him 2 weeks consistency...dint go out anywhr...but how is it posibl to not go nywhr even on the weekends..today he took 1.25 hours to go to sleep at night ...so tired and confused..

[Batool huzaifa]

And i love him being asleep by 8..but i want to chnge it just to accomodate the weekends...really dont know wat to do!

[Lindsay27]

I know he is chronically overtired but how to end it?

You end it by starting from scratch.  Commit to staying at home for a solid week or 2 and focusing on strictly his routine.  If you don't follow his routine regularly the same thing is just going to continue to  happen over and over again.

i dont go to the same place..its different everytime ..like a mall or so.. and its always crowded..its impossible to find a quiet dark place..but i watch other childrem fast asleep in their stroller..not even least bothered wats going on  around...but my lo wide awake...if i go out i ll miss euther his nap or his bedtime...its imposible not to miss either of them

Again I think this is a case of you needing to fit your life around your LO and not expecting your LO to fit his life around yours.  It is fine to go out, everyone needs that time, but you have to expect that if you do his day is going to be off, and if you do that every day he is not going to sustain a routine.  And just because everyone else's LOs appear to be asleep in strollers does not mean that you should expect your DS to do the same.  Every LO is different.  My DS was spirited and would never sleep out and about...it is just the way he was.

i know i not being consistent but i had thought once he is on his routine then he ll follow it even if m nt at hme..i gave him 2 weeks consistency...dint go out anywhr...but how is it posibl to not go nywhr even on the weekends..today he took 1.25 hours to go to sleep at night ...so tired and confused..

The point of being consistent is to keep the routine the same the majority of the time - so predictable naps at home, a predictable bed time.  You can't expect to dedicate 2 weeks to establish a routine and then completely throw him off by never sticking to what you had established.

And i love him being asleep by 8..but i want to chnge it just to accomodate the weekends...really dont know wat to do!

Again, you can't expect him to be in bed by 8pm 5 days of the week and then 11pm the other days without it impacting him, he's just a baby.  You need to accommodate your weekends around him, not the other way around.  And if you can't, then that's fine, but don't expect him to magically follow a routine when you are continually allowing him to become so overtired on weekends.  What you need to do is either stop keeping him out so late, or stop thinking he's going to have any kind of routine with that kind of schedule.